Jason Bourne: Portrait of an Artist

Rating: 10/10 (6 August 2007)

In "The Bourne Ultimatum" titular character Jason Bourne (a.k.a. David Webb) has finally elevated ass kicking to an art form. You could say he is the premier artist working in the medium of anal annihilation. He is peerless. Contemporaries such as John McClane and Jack Bauer have made relevant (and to be sure, important) strides in the field. But only Jason Bourne has mastered the rump-rupturing arts. To him, a book is not merely entertainment for a leisurely afternoon at the beach. Nor is a towel simply a convenient drying device. In the supremely talented hands of Jason Bourne these innocuous objects become weapons of ass destruction. It's truly a remarkable sight to behold, and one I encourage you all to witness.