over-rated unrealistic

Rating: 6/10 (4 November 2007)

In the days before Tom Clancy Robert Ludlum wrote the most popular, if fantastical, even slightly ridiculous, spy novels. But of course, times change and there is no way that a movie can come close to covering the complexities of a good spy novel. The Bourne Identity had to be updated because there is no more Carlos the Jackal, (in fact, there never really was, he was somewhat bad at his job- the press actually created a mountain out of a dung heap). Having read The Bourne Idnetity back in the day I had trouble equating Mat Dillon with the title character but realizing they would make the movie according to today's realities I tried to go in with an open mind. However, the movie was just too ridiculous.
(warning a summary and two spoilers)
The movie's premise stays true to the book in that an assassin named Jason Bourne is rescued by a fishing boat in the Mediterranaean. Half-dead, Bourne has two bullets in him and is soon in shape (a few days with scant medical supplies in the movie versus the book in which a drunk ex-British doctor sews him up and gives some good advice while rehabilitating him.) Next we see Bourne, though he doesn't know he's Bourne because he has amnesia, going to the Swiss city of Zurich because he has a small laser pointer containing the bank's address and an account number surgically implanted in his hip.
From there it is a whirl wind adventure through Europe as Bourne struggles to recall anything from his memory regarding his identity. All this man seems to be cut out for is killing. Along the way he picks up a wandering German chick who happens to agree to drive a mad man to Paris.Then he kills a lot of guys.
People have tagged this movie "relaisitc". that is both absurd and frightening. Bourne here is so bullet proof he seems like a kung fu movie hero from Saturday afternoons or a James Bond from the seventies. ALthough Damon does not seem to have the mileage to pull off the character- it is Bourne's inability to do any wrong that is too much to swallow. For example, in an old,lone french house in a tiny valley, surrounded by forested hills, the children's dog does not answer a morning call so Bourne, realizing he is being hunted (not so unrealistic) finds a shotgun, does not look outside and study the surroundings, then walks out and shots a heating oil tank and uses the ensuing smoke screen to run into cover towards the waiting assassin. Excpet for the fact, of course, how could he know where the killer was? Another even more implausible scenario was when he was at the top of stairwell being fired at by man coming up the stairwell, Bourne used a corpse as cover as they plummet five or six stories between the stringers of steps. Not only does Bourne shoot the assassin on the way down (at what, 64 feet per second) but he lands on his stomach on the corpse, as if that would break his fall (safety tip: when you try this at home you need to fall on your back, otherwise the force of the blow travels to your spine and blows it to pieces).
The gaps in reality are big enough to accommodate Al Gore's carbon footprint, if you want to see Chris Cooper and Matt Damon in a realistic movie, watch Syrianna. Or see Munich, that movie will show you how crazy the espionage game is. The Bourne Identity may be fun, but it's mental junk-food.