The Emperor's New Movie

Rating: 4/10 (17 July 1999)

With great anticipation I went this film, having heard so much buzz from critics, Internet postings and such. My oh my. Rarely has there been so much ado about nothing. I'm not going to outline the plot because you know it by now but here's a couple of thoughts: exactly who was the audience for this "documentary" that was being shot? It's filmed with all the technique of Uncle Jim's video of Timmy's birthday party. There's not even the slightest pretense of trying to make it look somewhat professional with interesting compositions, framings. The footage was UNWATCHABLE. I couldn't imagine watching their video for ten minutes much less a half hour to an hour.
Why must every banal moment be filmed? What possible interest could their viewers have in watching the filmmakers shoot the breeze in the motel room or talk in the car? It was unbelievable to see the amount of video that was used to capture moments that flat out did not belong in a supposedly serious documentary about the Blair Witch.
Here's the situation: You're in the middle of the woods at night in pitch black darkness. You hear groanings and rumblings in the distance that scare the living hell out of you. The first thing you do is... a) grab a weapon or some means to protect yourself and wait
b} grab a flashlight to investigate or c) turn on your video camera even though it's far too dark to see anything. EXCUSE ME!!???
Ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. All of the above contributed to my never buying into the nonfiction reality the filmmakers tried to convey and as a result I wasn't scared or thrilled one tiny bit by this film. It was a gimmick movie and the gimmick didn't work. Its sole redeeming feature lie in its performers. They were very effective. But other than that, you can have this movie.
Most disturbing film since The Exorcist? Puh-leeze.