Warning...Adam Sandler fan rips 'The Benchwarmers' a new one

Rating: 1/10 (19 August 2006)

This comment contains no spoilers, because the movie has already spoiled...it's rotten to the core.
I have just watched this piece of trash and I am convinced, that on my deathbed, and looking back upon my life, what I will regret the most is that I wasted 80 minutes of my life watching this garbage.
If it is true, what other users say about entire theaters laughing so loud that most of the jokes were missed, I worry about America's future. I believe the reality is that everyone was laughing because they were high on crack and the jokes were missed because there weren't really any jokes in this movie. Was this supposed to be a comedy, or was it simply your neighbor's god-awful home produced movie posted on YouTube? To compare this movie to crap, would be an insult to crap. I have lost intelligence due to watching this movie because the mere act of listening to the stupidest dialog ever written has destroyed more of my brain cells than any night of drinking or hard drugs I might have done in the past.
And who are the moron movie executives that green lit this project??? Why are they even working in Hollywood??? Did someone lose a bet, or does someone have video of them in a compromising position? I've seen better work at a mentally retarded home for children's playhouse than this movie. This movie reminds me of a preschooler's artwork posted on mom and dad's refrigerator and displayed for the world to see, not because it's good, but rather just to boost the poor talentless child's self esteem in an effort to encourage creativity, not to entertain the viewer.
I could throw letters from a Scrabble game on the floor and find a better script than the one that was written for this movie. It is interesting that most of the people who posted comments on this movie and enjoyed it cannot spell and have very bad grammar, it goes to show the intelligence level of fans of this movie.
I am 37 years old today, and I love movies, but only twice in my life have I been so disgusted by a movie, I felt moved enough to comment on it. This movie sucks, there's no doubt that my friend's two year old daughter could make a better movie.
John Heder needs to figure out how to shake off Napoleon Dynamite and get on with his life, lest he be dammed to these kind of crap roles for the rest of his career, which will end as soon as his face is too old to allow him to continue working. Does anyone remember Jim Varney??? How pathetic will John Heder be playing a Napoleon Dynamite knock-off role when he's 40.
I would rather go hunting with Dick Cheney, I would rather move to New Orleans, I would rather work as a meter maid in Baghdad, I would rather be sent to the gulag, I would rather listen to Fran Drescher's voice for 10 hours straight, I would rather watch the Czechoslovakian version of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy marathon than ever even hear about this movie again.
My disdain for this movie is not because I'm not a fan of this genre, I love Adam SandlerHappy Gilmore, The Wedding Singer, 50 First Dates, Tommy Boy, Joe Dirt, and Deuce Bigalow are some of my favorite movies, but The Benchwarmers sets the level of quality to an all time low.
If I were involved with project in anyway...I would do my level best to erase all trace of my involvement. If you liked this movie, then you are probably too stupid to understand this comment, so I don't worry about offending you.
If you are considering watching this movie, my advice is simple, save yourself some heartache, make your life a lot easier and just throw yourself in front of a train instead, believe me, you will be better off in the long run. Remember, you can't un-see something...you'll regret it, in fact... this movie is so bad, just reading reviews of it will make you stupider.
The more brain power I waste thinking about this movie to write this comment, the stupider I get. Please, for the love of all that's holy, skip this.