Ultimately a Long, BORING day at The Beach

Rating: Null/10 (14 February 2000)

This film was simply just middle ground. Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert Carlyle, and that new french chick are all game, but the plot and the writing is definitely not. Some of the dialogue in this mediocre film is simply banal. However, the cast is game (although you really wish that the french guy, the swedish injured guy, and most of Tilda Swinton's followers would simply just leave the film). Danny Boyle seems to think that visual flair can be substituted for a lame script, and to a point it does. But at the end of this torturous and lame LORD OF THE FLIES wannabe, you realize that it does not. Do yourself a favor and rent LORD OF THE FLIES or read THE BEACH instead (the paperback probably costs less than a movie ticket anyway) ... you'll thank me for it. If you want to see the french chick (or Leo) naked, I'm sure you can get pictures off of the internet.