Boring, and the plot has more holes than a golf course

Rating: 2/10 (31 December 2012)

This movie is sorely disappointing for at least two reasons.
First of all, it is plainly boring; most of the time is spent in pointless, overly dramatic dialogues that possibly would like to explore the emotional side of the characters, but which are so filled up with stereotypes - being a nerd, being a nerd that all of a sudden becomes cool, and being a rebel to your (adoptive) parents that don't understand you - that they quickly become unbearable. It takes you thirty minutes only to get to the point where Peter gets bitten and becomes Spider-man - hey, that could have been easily summarized in the first thirty seconds. Also, when at last you get some action, it is the kind of brawl in the dark side alley that looks like a bland replica of a Michael Jackson video from the 80's - not very exciting.
Secondly, the plot has more holes than a golf course. Every minute or so you stumble upon an unbelievable set of coincidences (your hottest schoolmate and love interest, who is also the most intelligent girl in the class, is also the assistant of your father's best friend and colleague, and also the daughter of the head of the local police - how likely is that, one in a billion?) or into a very apparent lack of coherence (e.g. Peter's hands stick to pieces of paper, but in the following scene they don't stick to the pencil and book he is holding, but in the following scene they stick to the computer's keys so much that they break, but they start to stick only after a minute of ordinary typing). In a scene Peter's uncle tells him that he is absolutely identical to his lost father, but just a few minutes later Peter meets his father's best friend and he won't recognize him. This is the kind of stuff that will break the suspension of disbelief and make the movie unbearable to anyone over 10 years of age.
In the end, for a while we enjoyed laughing at the plot's repeated inconsistencies, but after some time the experience became totally boring; when we realized that just one hour had passed and there was still over one hour to go, we just gave up and saved us the pain.