The fourth best Spiderman film out there.

Rating: 1/10 (22 January 2013)

The trailers made this film look like a first-person Spiderman game. I expected as much just to show off the 3D. I wasn't expecting much going into it, Spiderman is my absolute least favourite superhero after all, but thought there was no way it could be as bad as Spiderman 3! Oh how wrong I was.
I hate Kirsten Dunst in the other trilogy. I find Tobey to be annoying. But given the choice, I will watch one of their films over this, any day of the week.
I was bored the entire time. There was no coherent plot. I mean sure, a nerdy teen gets bitten by a spider, has Uncle Ben killed and becomes Spiderman, a vigilante who then gets involved with a mediocre arch- villain. But each of those things seemed to be taken from completely separate (and very crap) films, and sewn together in an attempt to make another film.
Peter Parker is meant to be some kind of social outcast, but he just comes across as a giant pervert, taking candid photos of his attractive schoolmates. He is meant to be some kind of genius, but the opposite is shown. He designed a wonderful gadget that locks his door closed, but he had to shut the door with his hand first, then go back across the room to push the special lock button. It is just very pointless and contrived. Don't even get me started on his preferred choice of internet search engine. I understand that I am meant to suspend belief, watching a film about a boy with spider powers who fights a lizard man. But I will not believe that any self respecting nerd will use Bing.
He then sneaks into a supposedly high security building, that uses ID with no photos, and gets bitten by a spider. After this he wakes up on the subway because a bum rests a beer bottle on his forehead, and a drip of water lands on him. He jumps onto the ceiling and then kicks everyone's butts. He somehow has these amazing fighting skills, and super strength. These are witnesses. He then goes to school where he uses his reflexes to humiliate the bully, and then smash a basketball hoop. Yet no-one is curious.
Martin Sheen gives him what for and then sets the scene for his murder. One of the worst things watching the film is that you know Sheen will die. Angsty teen then gets his Uncle killed and proceeds to try and hunt down the murderer for a half hour. He does not succeed. He then argues with his girlfriend's dad, who is the police chief, tells lovergirl he is Spiderman, then stumbles into a fight with the lizard dude.
Lizard man is the doctor who suddenly goes from wanting to grow his arm back, to realizing that humans are doomed and should be evolved into lizards themselves, in the space of about five minutes. He plans to release the virus he created (with Spiderman's help) into the air, failing to realize that Emma Stone can create an antidote in about 5 minutes.
The whole thing is just pointless, disjointed, and not worth watching. I had low expectations going into it, but was somehow still disappointed.