How can people who don't like Spider-Man make a Spider-Man movie?

Rating: 1/10 (5 August 2014)

I'm a mid-level Spider-Man fan. I've read most of the comics, at least up to the mid-90s when the continuity got harder to follow. I still follow what happens in the comics now. So I like to think that I have a handle on the character of Peter Parker.
What I see is a movie that was made without any consideration as to what makes Peter Parker a likable character. I'll ignore all the missteps of the first Amazing Spider-Man, and instead focus on how they messed this movie up. After Spider-Man enjoys a bit of action, he arrives in time for Peter to get his diploma. He strides onto the stage, wearing his backpack, takes his diploma, then delivers a substantial kiss with Gwen Stacy. This is not a Peter Parker that I've ever read comics about.
Later, Peter is transfixed by Gwen as he crosses a busy street to get to her. He steps forward and back, avoiding cars, until he just decides to hold his hand up, motioning for a truck to stop for him. Now, I know that a lot of people do this kind of thing. I think they're inconsiderate. Why is Peter like this?
There are two other key aspects of the movie that I think are indicative of a bigger problem. First, Gwen Stacy's death. In the comics, the direct cause of Gwen's death was uncertain. It could have been the Goblin, before she was thrown, it could have been Spider-Man's web breaking her fall. Peter isn't certain, and the uncertainty plagues him. Here, her cause of death is explicit. The script misses the point of the story.
The other thing is a little more abstract, and most of you won't understand, but some of you might. The planes. This is one of the most terribly done ticking-clock scenarios I've ever seen. It's clunky. Spider-Man gets no motivation out of it, since he doesn't know it's happening! The scene exists to try to force the audience to raise the tension. But why do we care about it? We don't!
There are a number of other problems - the storyline about Peter's parents. Aunt May becoming a nurse for some reason, Peter finding his father's secret lab. Peter's remarkably short 1.5-scene long friendship with Harry. Peter decides to retire from being Spider-Man for one whole scene, then comes back immediately. Why? This was a storyline that took a lot longer, and was developed and played out far more carefully in Spider-Man 2.
I have lots of other complaints about this movie, but mostly, I think it boils down to this.
We really don't have many non-fictional heroes nowadays. Spider-Man is one of the only characters I actually can look up to. This version of Spider-Man is not a hero. He's an annoying teenager with powers, and not even a smart or nice one at that. He doesn't have heart. He doesn't feel hurt. And somehow, he's well-liked around the city. The police like him. Why should I root for this guy? Cause he gives people hope, as the movie says? No. Spider-Man isn't about giving people hope. It's about inspiring people, and showing them that doing the right thing is its own reward.