What do you mean you didn't bring the lights either?

Rating: 2/10 (27 September 2002)

What the hell happened here? For starters where are the lights? Not one scene takes place and is filmed while properly lit. Including ones that take place during the day. Yeah, I know, y'all are going to say "Hey they take place at night, dude! All they had was candles!" What do I have to say in response to that? Watch Amadeus! Watch Braveheart! Watch damn near anything else!	So okay, you can't see anything that happens in this film, all right. I can let that go. It takes the entire point out of an action film, but okay. How does Antonio Banderas learn the freaking language so fast? That just ain't possible, kids. Granted I am watching a film about cannibal warriors, but still. Where is the motivation for any of these characters? Why does this story exist? Word is that McTiernan stormed off of the set because he too realized that it was terrible. Who directed the rest of the film and even re-shot footage? Crichton. Good God, who thought up that brilliant plan? Was is someone who happened to be a big "Coma" fan? This movie is awful. Awful awful awful! It made my brain hurt it was so bad. The costumes were pretty good, I guess. So that's something.