Did I miss something?

Rating: Null/10 (20 October 2003)

Spoilers... What the **** was THAT? I could've sworn I read somewhere that T3 was not complete and utter garbage. Whoever made that claim was completely and utterly wrong because - guess what? - T3 is complete and utter garbage. In a bold nod to originality and inspiration, this movie is about a terminator coming back from the future to kill someone, and being stopped by Arnie. Sounds pretty radical, right? Please, try to stay awake, it gets better. John Connor, who lives "off the grid" (an interesting concept symbolised by his throwing a bottle of Bud in a river) meets his old girl-friend from school, just in time for both of them to get attacked by a naked female Terminator. Unfortunately for the future of mankind, this is a "12" certificate movie, so we don't even get to see her bod. Which might just have alleviated the boredom. Also, that "12" means we cut down on the violence too. Hmmm, a Terminator film with no violence and a boring villain who's nowhere near as sinister or impressive as the ones in the first two. Yikes. T3 is a dull, uninspired, tedious bit of cash-in rubbish of which the governor of california should be mightily ashamed. He probably thinks it great, though. He's wrong.