Pointless sequel of a sci-fi classic

Rating: Null/10 (28 September 2004)

I love Terminator 2, possibly even more than the original. I admire the way it skillfully creates the idea of the unstoppable machine (the liquid-metal T-1000) mindlessly and tirelessly on the trail of our heroes. The action scenes are world class and the effects, revolutionary in their day, are still pretty impressive. There are some pretty big faults, demonstrated by the poor attempts at humour and personified in the role of John Connor (Edward Furlong), but as a piece of movie making it is a good benchmark. Much of T2 involves the characters trying to avert a war against intelligent machines, which is due to start in 1997. I'm sure I won't be giving away too much when I say that they succeed in preventing the war. The end.
So, why a third installment? Well, the rules of Hollywood accountancy dictate that, since T2 made so much money and since Arnie didn't object, even averted wars can get started up again.
In T3 we meet up with John Connor again, now in his 20's and living "off the grid". It seems he didn't trust that the machine threat was completely gone, so he is drifting around, using assumed names and doing his best not to appear in any databases. So when the inevitable happens and a new terminator is sent to kill him (along with a now-obligatory "friendly" terminator to protect him) its first mission is to track down and kill all the people who will help him in the future. His future lieutenants, as it were. In doing this, the new Terminator stumbles on John's trail and the chase begins.
This is not a James Cameron film (the other two were, and so was the 3D short which you can only see at Universal Studios) but he did contribute to the script. I wonder how much input he really had though, because it definitely lacks the Cameron sheen you expect from his own projects. It's just not as tight.
The new terminator is a female robot, with some of the abilities of the previous liquid killer but the new twist is that this one can form itself into a variety of high-powered weapons. Whereas Robert Patrick's T-1000 was limited to shaping himself into knives and sharp spikes in order to kill the Connors, the new T-X can whip out a souped-up plasma rifle which could blast a rhino in half. So, all the powers of the last one, plus some extra makes for a much more interesting character, right?
Not really. The T-X is not as engaging as the T-1000. Robert Patrick's character had oodles more menace than pretty girl Kristanna Loken. I remember being shocked the first time I saw bullets splat big holes in his liquid body, then watched the holes mysteriously close. The same thing happens again here, but it's a case of "yeah, we had that 13 years ago. What's new?"
Well, there's the certificate for starters. T2 was a 15, this is a 12. There's more humour too, unfortunately. Too often the movie tries to get laughs from Arnie's grim cyborg saying lines you wouldn't expect from a killing-machine. Like "talk to the hand". Har-bloody-har. Again, we had that 13 years ago and it was cack even then.
There is a nice destructive car chase and the action is well paced, but in the end it all seems rather pointless. Our only hope is that Arnie becomes so embroiled in politics that he can't find the time for another one.
I'll give it 5 out of 10.