Toy Story gone wrong; Tasteless and Forgettable.

Rating: 2/10 (26 March 2013)

Doesn't every child want their stuffed animals to come to life and talk? In fact, wasn't that the same idea which made Toy Story wildly successful? For a premise with endless potential, director/writer/actor Seth McFarlane does not deliver a story worth watching once, let alone twice. TED has received more hype than perhaps any other comedy in the last ten years, but has let me down the most.
The humor is crude, offensive and leaves me depressed and hopeless. In many ways, the film is trying harder than it should have to to get a laugh. I would have liked to be in the room when the writers decided "I have a good idea! Lets make a TV fall on a guys crotch and stab a knife into another guys hand. That'll be funny!". Though in many ways, this kind of so called "humor" is to be expected of the creator of Family Guy, which in itself is tasteless, I expected more of Marc Wahlburg and Mila Kunis. Both actors have previously been very creditable in dramas, Wahburg in The Fighter and Kunis in Black Swan, and both had supporting roles, which were actually funny, in Tina Fey and Steve Carell's Date Night. I kept watching TED with the hope of the end holding a redeeming quality, but it only got worse. Lets just say the best part of the movie was when the credits rolled and I could finally turn it off. I must thank McFarlane for one thing, I now have a sure fire way of telling if a man is worth dating by asking a single question; "Did you enjoy TED?". If the answer is yes, he is likely not worth my time.
The idea of a sequel makes me weep for the movie industry, America's intelligence and the fact the future generation will one day be leading this country. I mean, what are we really teaching our kids by portraying their beloved stuffed animals as unsympathetic, sex obsessed and downright rude characters? Nothing worthwhile, I can tell you that. Avoid this movie at all costs, and for goodness sakes, leave the kids at home watching something innocent and actually enjoyable.