Do you like cheese with your crackers?

Rating: 4/10 (29 January 2008)

One could honestly say, that Tim Burton is a legend in film making. His dark approach to films, that gets you under your skin and doesn't hold back. Quite often he's attempted to try his hand at other things, such as "The Nightmare Before Christmas" and "The Corpse Bride", which do the trick, if your a goth. Unfortunately, even the best have their off days, and this shows why you should stick to what you know, rather than be a jack of all trades.
With Johnny Depp playing really vital roles in the majority of Burton's films such as "Sleepy Hollow" and "Edward Scissorhands", Burton continue's his tradition of plonking the main role for Depp as Benjamin Barker. Judge Turpin (played by Mr. Bad himself, Alan Rickman) deports Benjamin Barker for a crime he did not commit, leaving Turpin to Barkers wife and daughter for the taking! With his wife dead, Barker returns to London to find salvation and seek revenge on the Judge.
With this, the story itself is brilliantly portrayed, Burton sprinkles his dark, moody, bloody self all over it. And thats brilliant.
What kills the whole film for me, and I didn't realise this upon entering the cinema screen, was the fact it was originally based on a Broadway musical. Way to go Burton! You've just made me pay £7.50 for what can only be described as your brilliant dark and dirty mind (which is what I love about Burton) ruined with the Broadway cheese wiped all over a pretty decent excuse for a film! From start to finish, you get cheese, cheese and more cheese. Actors who wouldn't really sing, trying to sing with dodgy cockney accents. Its been tried and tested before, and it didn't work. Oh, and abit of over the top blood for the sake of blood.
The only salvation in this film, is the fact that the supporting cast do really well to pull the film back on track. Sacha Boren Cohen shows how much of a multi talent he is as the mischeivous Pirelli, Timothy Spall also, shows how much of a talented actor he is, by being the dogs body for Judge Turpin, but it just doesn't hide the fact, that these actors should not be in a god damn musical. Even Depp, who I do hold high in esteem for his acting, can't face the music for this poor excuse of a role. At points, he even seems like he doesn't care. Like a bad Jack Sparrow.
To be honest, people who are voting this film extremely high 8, 9 or 10's, should be ashamed of themselves. This isn't Pirates folks, its Tim Burton picking at genre's he shouldn't be touching.
If you do like musicals, you will love this, and you will love it even more because Johnny Depp is in it, and you obviously like Andrew Lloyd-Webber. If you don;t like musicals, simply avoid this movie, you won't like it going in, and you won't like it coming out. Even if you TRY and cover up the fact its a musical, it still won't work. Even with Tim Burton and Depp behind the wheel.