There's a total of about 30 minutes worth of good movie in there.

Rating: 4/10 (23 March 2009)

Most negative reviews here complain about things like excessive profanity or the stupid and completely irrelevant dick story. Nevermind that; those were honestly the BEST parts of the movie! Unfortunately, that says a lot about the film as a whole.
For starters, the narrative is completely retarded. The reason I hesitated to see this movie for so long in the first place is because the premise was practically non-existent. "Huh? Two guys in high school want to buy alcohol and get laid? They make Hollywood MOVIES about that kind of stuff nowadays?" You know, it's sad... there are plenty of struggling writers out there who are pitching ideas based on new and imaginative concepts... giving the audience some credit, thinking they're expect fresh and imaginative ideas. Nope. Apparently the public actually wants to see a movie about the daily life of a horny teenager. What's next? "Okay, okay, I totally have a killer idea... let's make a movie about a guy, right, who -- get this --- wakes up at 2pm every day, eats a few frozen pizzas, takes one good sh*t, watches some TV, and falls asleep masturbating to Internet porn. Killer, amirite??"
Second, the fact that the movie has almost no interesting plot means it has to rely on quirky characters and Tarantino-style quotable dialogue. Okay, so Jonah Hill is a pretty good re-incarnation of Chris Penn and Michael Cera, well, he's the quirkiest thing since Amelie. And that skinny third kid... come on, we've all had friends like that. So kudos on that department and they have quite a few flat-out hilarious scenes. If you wonder which ones I'm talking about, check the Notable Quotes section for this movie and it will be whichever scenes are quoted IN THEIR ENTIRETY.
But that's about it!... and it's not enough. I think what happened is Seth Rogen was having a drunken conversation with his friends one day, had some good laughs, and then realized that what just transpired was movie-scene worthy. So I think he started with a couple of funny scenes and then tried to shoehorn them into some painfully-generic plot just to get us from one joke to another (think Family Guy). I mean how else can you explain the hilarious albeit 100% UNNECESSARY AND IRRELEVANT dick-drawing story? Seriously, what point did that serve in the movie?? It came practically out of nowhere, accomplished nothing, and was never mentioned again. But hey, the audience laughed, and that's enough, right? Seth, there's a show called Robot Chicken based entirely on funny short scenes/clips. You'd do best writing for them.
Oh yeah, and another thing Seth: write yourself a little cameo if you have to, don't give us a pain-inducingly annoying character midway into the movie. The movie pretty much jumped the shark the minute those two idiot cops showed up. They are introduced in what I thought was going to be another short humorous scene (and it was solid enough) but after that, they just don't go away! And you really want them to, but instead they become the worst and most tired running joke of the movie. Ehck.
In short, while a few of the scenes are really worth watching (on hulu.com or something), spending 2 hours is just way too much an investment.