lukewarm action porn

Rating: 4/10 (16 June 2011)

I'll begin with a good analogy. You should know by now that every porno flick has the same formula – a terrible storyline, and hot scenes at every interval. You don't watch a porno for the story. You click 'forward' and get to the good parts. Why do they even need to have a story, you ask? To tie it all together, that's the only reason. This movie is action porn. The plot is so, so bad. I mean REALLY bad. If you pay attention to the plot, then you will feel lobotomized. When you see the first action scene, you will be amazed, and you may even feel that this was worth your time and/or money – but, don't let this fool you, my friend. They simply repeat the same action sequence, four or five times, under different conditions. Did I mention the story sucks? You'll just fantasize about the blond chick for two hours.