Not a Fun Action Movie

Rating: 4/10 (23 March 2011)

To start off, I like dumb action movies, I even liked 300 and Watchmen. But this is a terrible movie for two very good reasons. One is the characters, which is to say there are none. Nobody has a personality in this movie, you could swap the main character for any one of the other girls and it wouldn't make the slightest bit of difference, she's just 'special' because the plot demands it. Yes it's a dumb action movie, but I still want the characters to be likable, to actually be interested and care about them. Leonidas was a badass warrior, Rorschach was an insane vigilante. The main character here is...a pretty girl. That's it. I dare you to find another personality trait on this chick because she does not have one and shows zero emotion during this film, she doesn't even look like she's having fun making a cheesy movie like Ahnold might be able to bring to a dumb action movie. And lets not forget the main villain is a weaselly dude that most of the girls tower over, so don't expect to find him menacing either.
So that leaves the action to save things. And it doesn't. The movie doesn't have the visceral gore of Snyder's other movies since this is PG-13, so the CGI battles are all bloodless gun battles and chopping up CGI effects. And what I said about characters hurts things here too because there are no standout baddies to fight. Only the first fight of the movie features any sort of trouble for our hero, after that it's just mowing down hundreds of faceless dudes which gets boring surprisingly quick. There's no Agent Smith, no Darth Vader, no climatic battle where our heroes have to summon up all their strength to defeat the main villain. Just chop chop, shoot shoot, done.
You wanna see this movie? Watch the trailer, guess how it ends. You just saved yourself some time and money. The only positive thing I have to say about this movie is the girls are quite nice looking, but this is the Internet, finding pretty girls to ogle isn't terribly difficult.