Boring and amateurish

Rating: 4/10 (8 September 2007)

I'm amazed at the good reviews for this boring, amateurish and overlong stab at a PRINCESS BRIDE-type fantasy. There's a reason why this tanked at the box office -- because it's a mess. It's like someone took a bunch of fantasy film elements, threw in De Niro as a gay pirate as a sop to PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN fans, then tossed in a Renaissance Faire and threw it all in a blender, set to "baby food puree." Maybe the book is really good or something and the film just didn't capture it, but I don't have much desire to read the book after seeing this. Charlie Cox was just about the only watchable element; Claire Danes seemed seriously miscast (maybe Gwyneth Paltrow was unavailable?), while De Niro and Pfeiffer did the best they could with what little they had. Subplot with murderous princes wasn't very interesting (and the dead princes commenting on the action just wasn't amusing at all). Special effects were hokey when they weren't pointless (did we need an extended scene of shards of shattering glass, and three falling chandeliers when one would have done?), the film had no original visual style whatsoever, and the score was pedestrian. I would like to see Charlie Cox again in a better film, though.