This had a great Director and Writer along with a dream cast... What the hell happened!?

Rating: 1/10 (22 February 2018)

I... Just don't know what to say. This Star Wars movie might actually be the worst of the lot. No this isn't "Empire Strikes Back of its time" syndrome, this i a genuinely awful movie... And it has some of the best talent assembled. I'm not kidding, this had a great director and writer along with a dream case... What the hell happened!? I don't fully know if it was pushed by some stupid agenda (many quote Producer Kathleen Kennedy for that reason which sadly holds weight), if it was the wrong director for the job or what but this movie is just BAD! I felt both wounded and insulted after watching this movie, the same way I felt wounded and insulted after Transformers 2; Revenge of the Fallen. After reading that, you must be wondering why I am saying all of this... Well, here we go.
First: the story. Oh it is so scattered. It does not have a focus of any real kind! Not to mention there are things here that just don't add up considering what was built up from the previous movie. Suddenly it starts with the Alliance (sorry, "the resistance". Still not used to that) escaping the First Order who has discovered them. This fleet is lead by General Hux... Who last I checked was still escaping Star Killer base... Yeah, you see the first problem here. There's no consistency. Maybe if it was a different commander it would be smoother but that was rather dumb. Then Poe comes along and distracts Hux by "tooling with him" as the captain says and then enters problem no.2: Marvel movie style humour. Perhaps this sort of humour works for Guardians of the Galaxy and The Avengers but definitely not for Star Wars... And there's so much of it, it really is forced and takes you out of the magic. Star Wars did have humour with some hits and misses but even the misses still felt like it belonged somehow. Moving on, Poe then destroys a dreadnought's guns allowing bomber ships to launch an attack... And every single one of them must have been made from tin because they just fall apart after being shot six times by enemy fighters. Anyway, one bomber manages to succeed in destroying this dreadnought by dropping its payload (there's gravity in space now) while sacrificing itself. The Resistance escapes, Poe gets demoted by an angry General Leia... Who is angry for both an understandable reason and stupid reason. Poe may have cost them a lot of bombers but he took out a super ship while doing it and she could have over ridden his orders at any time and-Oh lord there's the third problem which I'll get into when I talk about the characters. Meanwhile, Rey is on the planet which Luke has exiled himself to. Here I wondered what Luke was going to say after getting his father's lightsaber back, here I wondered if he was doing some sort of special training, or teaching a new Jedi academy underground or both. What happens? After he's given the lightsaber, he looks at it then tosses it over his shoulder then walks off and wants to be left alone... Later he talks about wanting to die so that the Jedi will no longer exist... Which really defeats the purpose of the previous movie, does it not? Rey must convince Luke to train her and the Resistance must now escape the First Order who is now able to track them with a hyper-drive tracking machine of some sort...
Okay, now let's get down to the next part, the plot: There isn't one. Or rather, one that lacks consistency and focus. There's something like five different stories trying to come out here. There's Rey trying to convince Luke to train her, there's the Resistance trying to escape, there's Finn and Rose (new character) who are on a secret mission, there's Kylo Ren's progression and there's Poe struggling with their new commander. After throwing away the potential of a Jedi academy or Luke's secret training, we get only a couple of scenes of Luke training Rey after too many scenes of Luke being a grouch, drinking alien sea cows milk right after milking them and fishing with a 100 foot spear. There's this whole anti-extreme capitalist message at this very boring casino where Finn and Rose are trying to find this hacker (which kinda ends up being a red herring)... And I can't help but feel like there is some sort of good movie trying to get out but it's marred with so much stupidity. I'm sorry, there's no other word for it. What happens during the escape of the resistance, the bridge of the capital ship gets destroyed and Leia, along with other officers such as Admiral Ackbar (yeah, no one's ever heard of him) get sucked out into space, but Leia survives because right out from no where she can use the force and fly back to the bridge and get through the door while surviving in space... Never explained how she learned to do that by the way. It would have been nice if there was a reference to Luke training her but NO we are just supposed to accept that she's superwoman. Then this new Admiral comes in, Vice Admiral Holtz (the only character worse than Jar Jar Binks) and she doesn't tell anyone what the plan is and only to hope for the best as they flee from the fleet, which Poe gets angry about and after butting heads with each other, Poe leads a mutiny against Holtz and then tries to do something for the fleet only for Leia to come back, stun Poe and the plan then was to escape to the nearby planet on stealth ships that cannot be scanned on any radar this whole time... Why Holtz never told Poe anything is beyond me, especially considering that in real life, if something like that was happening, every member of the military including the privates and cadets would have been told that plan... But her reason was to teach Poe a lesson and she never gets called out for it. Meanwhile, Finn and Rose where on that casino planet looking for a hacker. They park on the beach instead of a place where it could have been better hidden (I don't know why) and as you expect, they get imprisoned. They find a hacker in their prison cell and they escape with him only to be later betrayed by him and that hacker, DJ I think he was called, also gives the Resistance the ability to scan those stealth ships. The First Order opens fire and Holdo, who remained behind on the ship, just watches in horror while nearly half the fleet is destroyed until she decides to do something which is enter hyperspace at the First Order fleet which leads to cool moment number two.
During the time Luke and Rey are "training", Rey and Kylo are able to communicate with each other with some sort of telepathy and okay I'll admit those moments weren't bad but again a few off putting moments again during that. Though we do learn the truth why Kylo went to the dark side: It's because Luke after sensing his struggle with the darkness considered to murder him....... Our once lead hero, the man who against all odds managed to redeem his father who not only turned to the dark side but actually did commit many nearly successful genocides, thought about killing HIS NEPHEW based on visions which probably could have been avoided if he didn't activate his lightsaber (also you only see him wield his green saber twice, both in flashback which is very weird)-can you see where I'm going with this? After Rey learns that she goes off with Chewbacca (who I only now just mentioned because he barely gets any screen time at all) to confront Kylo, only to be captured, brought to Snoke, briefly tortured by him, then Kylo kills Snoke unexpectedly and Rey and Kylo fight off Snokes guard. Kylo then talks to Rey about how everything needs to die and should die so new things can begin which... To be fair is an interesting idea but the execution could have been stronger. Oh, also Rey's parents are nobodies now... Yeah, that was another red herring. So far she's not Kenobi's granddaughter or Luke's long lost daughter, no she's just this omnipotent being who can fight off Sith Warriors with very little training and there's no explanation. Anyway, after breaking Anakin's lightsaber after a force struggle, she escapes after Holdo hyperspaces through the First Order fleet. Kylo then takes the fight to the salt planet (not snow planet) and then there's a diet version of Empire Strikes Back battle scene. You see, they have to stop the first order from using a battering ram cannon (yes that's what it's called) and the First Order has walkers on the attack and the Resistance, old speers. Finn attempts to sacrifice himself to take out the cannon but rose rams his speeder to save him... All the while dooming the rebellion. Finn manages to get Rose all the way back to the base somehow and before the Resistance moves forward, Luke appears. Talks to Leia then goes to fight Kylo Ren on his own. When Luke confront Kylo... With Anakin's blue saber which we all saw destroyed instead of his green one which he made (you know, the one everyone wanted to see), Luke sort of humiliates Kylo in combat, then when Luke gives a speech, Kyloe tries to strike him down only to realize that he was a projection this whole time. Luke was on that planet the whole time. After his ends the confrontation, We go back to real Luke who looks out to the twin suns of that planet... Then just disappears.... For no reason. No amazing sacrifice, not old age after a hard life, just ran out of juice and just decided to apparently............ For a man who really wanted to die, he didn't try very hard. Anyway, what's left of the resistance escapes on the Millennium Falcon and Rey and Leia have a heart to heart talk. Then the movie cuts to a scene of these kids who were scene at the casino talk about the legend of Luke Skywalker, then one goes outside to sweep and somehow uses the force to pull a broom to him............
Can you see how little, if ANYTHING here makes sense whatsoever!? I can go on and on but IMDb has a limit. Let me just finish by saying just go watch the How It Should Have Ended episode of The Last Jedi and there you will get a much better Star Wars movie...... I seriously do not understand what happened here.