The Last Jedi Broke My Heart

Rating: Null/10 (22 December 2017)

And, the hearts of my children. I was extremely skeptical when Disney first bought this precious empire but my heart was won by TFA and RO made me a believer. I went into TLJ on opening night full of trust and expectation.
Within the first two minutes of the movie I found myself launched into the stages of grief, beginning with denial: I actually felt confused and found myself wondering if the movie was starting out by showing outtakes from the filming. Surely, Star Wars does not open with yer-mom jokes.
As the scenes rolled by I was gripped with a something-is-wrong feeling that didn't leave me until the later that evening when I entered into the anger portion of the stages of grief.
I don't want to simply repeat everything that other devastated fans are saying. Simply put, Rian Johnson butchered this movie and has made a giant mess for J.J. Abrams to deal with. He made jokes out of serious SW elements; the Force, the Jedi, Luke Skywalker, Master Yoda, saying, "May the Force be with you," the sith tradition of wearing a helmet, etc. He needlessly killed off characters whom we'd only begun to get to know and from whom we wanted more; Phasma, Snoke, Holdo. He needlessly ended Luke's story and Leia, who deserved a noble hero's death is still alive to be dealt with later. The Skywalker lightsaber: destroyed. Snoke's disco robe: good grief.
The pace of the movie was bad, giving the impression of a slapstick comedy or, well, a Disney movie. Like watching a SNL skit about SW. The story was a mess with no clear beginning, middle and end. The force ghosting felt weak and unbelievable with Rey and Ren and disappointing with Luke. The conclusion-less, failed missions were disheartening. The major conflict was boring; seriously Rian? You can think of anything more exciting than running out of gas?
The one good thing I can say about The Last Jedi is that the fight scene with Rey and Ren was amazing. Too bad it was pointless and didn't actually accomplish anything.
I'm moving towards acceptance and taking the stance that this is #notmystarwars.