Plz Read..First IMDB Review, and I Love Star Wars..

Rating: 4/10 (29 December 2017)

*Edit - This got a little long, but it's worth the read.
Disney is dumbing the Star Wars universe down to appeal to a broader audience.. not a Star Wars audience.
I saw this movie the Thursday that it came out, the next day, and the following day after that. It was more enjoyable the third time simply because my expectations had been destroyed and I knew what I was getting myself into (obviously, I saw it 3 damn times in 3 damn days).
I shouldn't even have to point out how well the film looked - top dollar Disney should provide AT LEAST a good LOOKING film, and they did. So yay a little. First thing that I liked was how eager Rey was to learn the ways of the Jedi. I love the original Saga more than the prequels, but after seeing The Last Jedi, I seriously miss the prequels. Aside from awful dialogue, the prequels weren't bad at all, some lackluster acting around most corners, but a high quality Star Wars story told nonetheless with great action and distinct fighting choreography for each film. I'm sorry - this review is not about the prequels.
Aside from the over the top attempt at comedy and the cash grabbing Porgs and the feel as if it were an average MARVEL film.. here we go.
Luke was an absolute disappointment, a child who can't get over his past mistakes to save the galaxy and his damn sister. I'll pretend like the force presence at the end wasn't stupid and credit his strength with the force to even accomplish this feat (honestly hate it though).In Empire Strikes Back - Luke disobeys his master to put his life in danger to save his sister (he didn't even know at this point that she was his sister! And he still made the decision to risk his life to save her...)
Remember when people had a problem with Luke only training for a short time on Degobah? haha Well Luke was training for an eternity compared to how long Rey trained with Luke. I understand that she's a strong force user by nature, sure, but it takes legitimate training to defeat trained body guards of the strongest force user in the current universe.. one would think at least.
The Force Awakens was a great film and a great softball toss up for Rian Johnson to hit out of the damn park with 8, but he decided to headbutt that softball toss up and plop it right onto the ground. The fans wanted at least ONE THING to be answered, but we sadly got NOTHING. Worse than NOTHING! Our hopes were cut and half and sold for drinking money.
Snoke.. who were you? Because I wanted to know who you were more than I wanted to know who Rey's parents were/are. Good thing you apparently were worthless because you're gone, and killed in the most pathetic way possible.
Critics had their fun pulling apart The Force Awakens due to how similar it was to A New Hope, but come onnnnn. This movie was The Empire Strikes Back mixed with Return of The Jedi with all of the awesome parts taken out. Luke goes into the dark part of Degobah - Rey goes into the dark part of Luke's Island. Luke turns himself into the Empire to try to turn Vader - Rey turns herself into the First Order to try to turn Kylo (THEY ALMOST HAVE THE SAME DAMN CONVERSATION!!! IN AN ELEVATOR TOO!!!) Then Snoke/Sidious shows Rey/Luke how he's destroying her/his friends attempt to win the day. Then Phasma/Boba Fett look badass and ultimately die falling to a lame premature death. Then the walker fight scene on an ice/salt planet..
Don't even get me started on how worthless Finn and Rose are. They would've been more productive to the plot if they were killed as soon as they made an appearance. They did nothing but hurt what the Resistance was trying to accomplish. Also.. Why the hell was Poe not filled in on what the ACTUAL plan was? Because a "flyboy" like him was likely to cause a ton of damage being held in the dark. The Casino scene.. I went and took a dump during that scene the 3rd time.
Leia and the space thing?? What? haha what was that??
People keep crediting the movie for the fight scene with Kylo And Rey vs Snoke's guards. It was a fun fight to watch, but the fact that THAT was the coolest fighting scene is just not a good sign for a Star Wars film with an awful plot.
Phasma appears to be dead, and it's ridiculous to think that she could still be alive. I don't know what I expected with Phasma, but I wanted more than for her to be killed by someone as worthless as Finn.
I hate Rose, 100% unnecessary. When I saw that Finn was going to sacrifice himself to save the Resistance - I was relieved. It would've been a noble death and for a greater purpose - but instead Rose sacrificed herself to save Finn... then she kissed him......? lol wut.
---HERE ARE THE THNGS THAT MAKE ME HATE IT LESS... I mean it.
Yoda - at least he was there, and I actually appreciated his classic puppet self - I had no problem with that.
Rey did take the ancient Jedi texts when she realized that Luke was going to be a toddler about saving the galaxy. Yoda even specifically didn't let Luke know that she took them too! I liked that. Luke was going to go in and burn the books alone, but Yoda shot it with lightning and didn't let him enter the library. I had no idea that Rey even took the books until the very end when you saw them in the drawer in the falcon. But what I loved was that Yoda was being literal when he said "there's nothing in that Library that the girl Rey doesn't already possess" I originally thought that he meant it was all inside her and whatnot and that's stupid lol. But he literally knew that she took them and he didn't let Luke find out.
The kid at the end has some significance that I noticed after seeing it the second time. When Rey is in the dark area of the island and she's touching her reflection you can here a little boy's voice yell "Rey!" It's really subtle but it's definitely a little boy's voice.
Luke will be back as a force ghost most likely - that's a relief at least.
There is a chance Snoke is alive, Rey and Kylo had their connection at the end and we know that they only had that because Snoke was manipulating it.
Ultimately - episode 9 better be DAMN GOOD, or else I'm done with Disney and Star Wars.