I'm Mary Poppins y'all.

Rating: 1/10 (22 December 2017)

I'm still in shock!
After watching Rogue One I thought Disney were taking Star Wars seriously. The trailers for this movie gave the impression we were getting a grown up, mature film. Wrong!!!!!
Rian Johnson wants us to let go of the past, to grow up and move on from our childish enjoyment of the Star Wars movies. This to me is very ironic as he has given us one of it's most juvenile instalments. The Porgs and Horse things chase on the Casino planet are there only to please the under fives along with some very misplaced humor. This movie seems to treat long term fans with disdain, a Star Wars movie for people who either dislike or are indifferent to Star Wars movies.
In this poor excuse of a film we are given the explanation that Ben Solo turns to the Dark side because Luke tried to kill him in his sleep because of a darkness inside of Ben. Had anyone bothered to watch the original trilogy they would know that Luke would not be inclined to do such a thing as he was never frightened by the darkness inside of his child murdering father and chose instead to help him. Rian Johnson has explained that the reason for this is because even Luke Skywalker is still susceptible to the lure of the dark side and for a fleeting moment considered choosing the quick and easy path. To me this is also ironic as the writers seemed to do just that. Instead of writing a compelling and convincing reason for Ben Solo turning to the dark side and his dissolution with Skywalker, we're just told to accept Luke had a funny turn and everything went south from there.
In terms of plot, it's just a very slow chase through space. All the interesting stuff from The Force Awakens is jettisoned for uninteresting sub (par) plots, captain Phasma has pretty much nothing to do again and the other instantly iconic looking characters, the Knights of Ren, weren't even mentioned. Instead we get uninteresting characters that have no other purpose than to spout exposition because we're too dumb (or bored) to follow proceedings. Rey just seems to be there, Finn is given a rather unnecessary romantic plot line and sent on a wild Bantha chase, Poe is now an idiot and Hux a bafoon.
I got nothing from this movie that I couldn't have gotten from a Guardians of the Galaxy or any other Marvel effort. Rian Johnson has thrown away Star Wars' unique individuality and supplied us with something which resembles every other blockbuster. More irony this as he wanted to give us something totally different but ended up giving us more of the same. The ground work has been done for you Rian, all you had to do was expand!!
Unfortunately this movie has made a ton of money so they won't care.