Episode 8

Rating: 5/10 (19 December 2015)

I can complain about everything that's wrong with Episode 7, but it won't do any good -- what's done is done. Here's what needs to be done in the next episode to get Star Wars back on track:
+ Kylo Ren needs to grow a pair. He started off as a true bad ass, but by the end of the movie he's completely harmless, even laughable. I mean is anyone really scared of Kylo Ren anymore? He lost a light saber duel to a girl who never held (let alone used) a light saber in her life. Heck, he had a hard time taking on Finn who also has virtually no experience using a light saber and isn't even force sensitive. What happened to Darth Maul, Vader, Dooku, Palpatine? -- you know the bad guys who were so skilled with a light saber it took multiple JEDIs to even stand a chance in a saber battle. Snoke mentions at the end that Kylo Ren needs to return to 'complete his training' - - hopefully this entails learning how to use a light saber. Kylo Ren coming back in Episode 8 as anything short of the most evil villain in movie history will ruin this trilogy.
+ Finn needs to go away. Sorry, but it's the truth. He was in a coma at the end of episode 7 and let's hope he remains that way for episodes 8 and 9. Within the first 30 minutes, we learn he's a traitor, coward, and liar. Why would anyone like this character? The fact that he used Luke's light saber in a battle and is not a Jedi is sacrilege to all of the people who grow up with the original trilogy. It's clear as a day Finn's just in the movie for PC reasons which is nonsense. I couldn't care less when he got injured at the end of the movie because he's not likable.
+ Rey needs to train with Luke to become a Jedi in the most epic Jedi training scene in Star Wars history. The fact that she somehow already knows how to use the force, mind-tricks, light saber, etc is going to make this difficult, but it needs to be done. Of course, we don't know why she was able to learn this stuff almost instantaneously while it took Anakin, Luke, Obi-Wan, etc years of training. The movie needs to climax with Luke/Rey battling a MUCH, MUCH more powerful Kylo Ren in an EPIC light saber battle -- a battle that ends in Rey losing an hand, arm, leg, etc.
+ We need a back story. What the heck is going on? Why did Kylo Ren switch to the dark side? Why did Luke give up after Ren turned to dark side (he should be used to it by now)? What were Han and Chewbacca doing for the last 30 years besides looking for the Falcon? What has Luke been doing on his island? Who is Rey and why was she abandoned? Why is Finn against the First Order? Why did Han and Leia separate? What happened to the Empire after the second Death Star was destroyed? How did the First Order rise? Why does Kylo Ren have Darth Vader's mask? Why did that yellow creature have Luke Skywalker's light saber in an unprotected box in her basement? Why does 3PO have a red arm? I was looking forward to hear what happened in the last 30 years since I saw 'Return of the Jedi' and we learn nothing.
+ Stop with the CGI -- This movie definitely cut back on the CGI compared to the prequels, but still used too much. Why was the 'new Yoda' CGI? Why couldn't they use a puppet? The 'new Yoda' was some pretty lousy CGI too -- she looks so fake and we're supposed to find deep meaning in what she's saying? When she first turned around and screamed 'HAN SOLOOOOOO' with that horrible fake CGI face, I felt embarrassed to be a Star Wars fan. And, then there's Snoke -- another CGI character that looks straight out of a 10 year old video game. The original Emperor was much scarier because he was a REAL person.
Some other thoughts:
+ Luke Skywalker being in the movie for 30 seconds and not saying a single word is a really crappy move on Disney's part. I know I'm not the only person who's been waiting 30 years to see Luke on the big screen again and then to pull this crap and make us wait another 3 years is a cheap move -- especially when they made such a big deal about Mark Hamill being in the movie and giving him top billing. Heck, I would have been happy if just said one or two lines but, no, we get him turning around and looking like a crazy homeless drunk.
+ The trailer is misleading -- two of the coolest scenes were 1) Luke touching R2D2 with his robotic hand and 2) Kylo Ren lighting up his light saber in the rain with his knights around him. It turns out neither of these scenes are actually 'real' scenes -- they're just part of some vision Rey has when she touches Luke Skywalker's light saber for some reason.
+ I'm OK with Han dying and it helped to make Kylo Ren look evil by killing his father (which was later ruined in the subsequent saber battle). But I'm not OK with the way it happened. Han should have died in a blaze of glory. This is the guy who, being told he'd freeze to death if he went outside to find Luke on Hoth, responded 'then I'll see you in hell'. And he gets killed by a cheap 'saber though the chest' move. Wrong.