Thank you, Disney, for murdering a huge part of my childhood

Rating: 6/10 (25 March 2016)

Despite the review's title, I actually enjoyed the movie quite a lot - hence the rating of six out of ten. I think Abrams did a good job as a director, and the actors were also good enough. But that is it. In fact, the writing of this movie is so deeply flawed I have a hard time finding anything positive about it. And yes, by the way, that is a fact. You will forgive me for saying it like this, but the prequels are better. Again, that is a fact. It is not a matter of opinion. I will try to explain it here.
First, 'The Force Awakens' can be described as, well, "Same, but different... But still the same." That has been mentioned more than once by pretty much every single film reviewer on the planet, but it just needs to be said again - a direct remake of Episode 4 would probably have less in common with it than Episode 7 does. And the similarities with the original trilogy do not end with the plot or even the characters. No, everything is the same but with a different name. Everything. We have a desert planet that is not Tatooine, an ice planet that is not Hoth, a green planet that is not Endor, a cute little trashcan that is not R2-D2, a planet sized weapon that is not a Death Star... You get the point. Honestly, if this were a piece of fan fiction written by a 13 year old, I would probably applaud its author for the effort. But it was written by Lawrence Kasdan - a legendary writer with four Oscar nominations, who worked on - arguably - the best movies in the entire franchise and on the Indiana Jones franchise. If there were only one writer in the entire Galaxy who would know how to do a proper Star Wars movie, that would be him, right? No. He and J. J. Abrams just cobbled together some elements from all six previous movies, changed a few names and wrote a few pages of dialogue that doesn't suck completely. Seriously, the only thing that this movie has better than the prequels is the dialogues, and that is because the dialogues in Episodes 1-3 were simply awful.
Second, this movie is just not finished. Honestly, I am this close to dropping the Marvel Cinematic Universe, because I am getting tired of movies that don't work as stand alone pieces of entertainment. You know, every single MCU movie, with no exceptions, is just a set up for the next one. Apparently, Disney are going to treat Star Wars the same way - the development of the new characters is all left for the sequels. Rey is a perfect fighter, a perfect shooter, a near perfect Force user, a perfect pilot... And why is that? Watch the sequels and you will know... Finn can use a lightsaber... Why is that? Watch the sequels and you will know... Poe and Finn are set up to be a couple, or are they? Watch the sequels and you will know... Well, I probably won't waste my time. Despite the admittedly good acting, I couldn't form an emotional connection with any of the new leading characters, because they were so underdeveloped I couldn't give a damn about them, no matter how hard I tried. And I did try. Very hard. It is just that... Well, half of the movie consists of nostalgic hooks connecting it with the original trilogy, and most of the other half consists of hooks connecting it with the inevitable sequels. The rest is plot holes bigger than the Death Star.
Third, Finn... Boyega's performance was probably the best acting in the entire movie, but the character was so horribly written I had to devote an entire paragraph to him. In his first scene he is completely gobsmacked by the sight of another stormtrooper's death, but just a few minutes later he shows no remorse while killing tens of stormtroopers. In one scene he is the perfect fighter, in the next one he is a blundering comic relief. A stormtrooper wipes the floor with him in a lightsaber fight, but then Finn manages to fight off the best lightsaber master in the movie for almost a minute... It is just like... In every scene Finn is what the scene needs him to be, regardless of what he has been just five minutes ago. I could continue, but I would need an entire review just to count all of this character's writing's flaws.
Fourth, this is what is the most painful to me. This is what Disney murdered for me - the old trilogy. How can I watch it now that I know everything Luke, Han and Leia fought for ended with a spectacular failure? Han and Leia ended up separated, their son - the biggest evil in the Galaxy. Luke ended up a complete failure as a Jedi master and teacher. Everything they achieved by defeating the Empire was obliterated in less than three decades. So... They failed, as they were thrown to the ground, if you'll forgive me the Tenacious D reference. Disney didn't fail, though - the movie was the biggest financial success ever. Well... I hope they choke on that money. They killed something I love and ate its corpse right in front of me. Thanks.