The Force Reawakens... on Déjà Vu Planet or 'That's not how Star Wars works!'

Rating: 1/10 (19 February 2016)

This review contains all possible spoilers, but so does A New Hope.
Allow me to briefly summarize the story of The Force Awakens: A young and adventurous orphaned main character is stuck on a desert planet. She meets a cute, small droid who can only bleep. He carries very important data that could eventually help to prevent the enemy and his consorts from carrying out their evil plan. They built a dangerous globe-shaped weapon of gigantic proportions that can destroy planets and they plan to use it. The main character is discovered to be force sensitive and is thus expected from the start to stand up against the central villain, a guy in a dark suit with a mask who is the offspring of and trained by 'the good guys' but turned evil.
Sound familiar? It should if you consider yourself a Star Wars fan, which at least requires you to have watched the 2 previous trilogies. In fact, if you've watched the first Star Wars movie, A New Hope, from the original trilogy, that's enough to be able to predict the plot of this entire movie. This movie blatantly steals all the previous Star Wars plot elements and has the guts to think it can cover that up by replacing them with their polar opposites or the replacement of a few syllables.
Lucas says Rebellion, Disney says Resistance. Lucas says Darth Vader, Disney says Kylo Ren. Lucas says the Emperor, Disney says Snoke. Lucas says R2D2, Disney says BB-8 (and R2D2 as nostalgic sidekick) Lucas says Death Star I and II, Disney says Starkiller base. And so on, to infinity and beyond...
I was not surprised when this 'Little Mermaid II in space' was received as a masterpiece by the so-called 'fans', roughly the same people who called Avatar 'Pocahontas in space'. Their criticism towards George Lucas's prequels and their irrational hatred of Jar Jar probably blinded them to their own double standards. When a director decides an extra movie will do a book more justice in an adaptation they immediately have the word 'capitalist' ready but when a movie obviously recycles a previous success for commercial reasons it is a masterpiece? Actually, the fact that I saw this ill- deserved rain of praise of The Force Awakens coming makes having to deal with this unfounded hype every day even worse. Disney's early trailers clearly illustrated their efforts to please an insane minority of self-proclaimed intellectuals drunk from delusions like 'CGI is evil and rubber puppets are objectively more credible characters'. This cunning visual trip through nostalgiarama even had me in its grip for the first minutes of the movie. The retro visual style and music brought you back to the future of 1977, amongst your favorite characters. Only, they were not your favorite characters anymore. Leia was an extract of her old self, Han Solo was back to his old game as if his old adventures had never changed his personality at all, Luke has crawled away like a coward on some deserted planet after a lifetime of heroism... Once you could no longer avoid the black plot holes in the story I realized that copying the plot elements from the very first Star Wars movie keeps you warm and fuzzy for a while until you sense the absence of lore, a political background and pretty much everything that made Star Wars Star Wars. I call it: the Lucas touch, which is in my opinion the core ingredient to what Star Wars REALLY is, not what a bunch of crazed fans, who have only ever consumed Star Wars and never contributed to it, make it out to be. The essence to the Star Wars story arc, the warmth to the stories and coming of age of the characters, all lost.
I really did enjoy the movie at first, even though the stolen parts from George Lucas were smacking me in the face. The dialogs were fun, the characters were fun (because most of them were Lucas') and there were some witty, enjoyable lines, my favorite being: "That's not how the Force works!" I wanted to rate this movie a six or a seven, but that was before it left me empty after the credits. Disney threw away a big part of the Star Wars lore in favor of their own amateurish, commercial perspective on it. Praising The Force Awakens is like praising a cook for putting another cook's ingredients in a bowl and even using his recipe. This can hardly be called a sequel. First, I don't acknowledge it. I don't want this to be the outcome of all previous Star Wars adventure. I refuse to accept that. But secondly, it's more of a remake anyway or a 'requel', whatever...
If this what is generally accepted as the movie of the year: a blunt copy mixed with a politically correct checklist? A New Hope but with a feminist Mary Sue character and a painfully stereotypical black character as protagonists? Motives that have nothing to do with creation or artistry anymore and that have even lead to the creation of an abomination like a silver female Stormtrooper (Whaaaaat?!)? Then maybe we should give up Hollywood altogether and turn to other media for entertainment.
But, who knows, maybe Disney was a bit insecure and decided to make their first movie a summary of the previous ones while working on more imaginative sequels that are not driven by political correctness but by creative integrity.
After The Force Plagiarizes, I'm still looking forward to Star Wars episodes 8 and 9: Nostalgia Strikes Again and Return of the Same Old Movie...