"Are you kidding me?" is what you will hear yourself saying aloud.

Rating: 1/10 (6 January 2016)

This is like having a money tree. Can't you just see them sitting around drinking their lattes and smiling at each other, phones in hands watching their bank accounts fill up? Just imagine, every year they can release a new reboot-quil. J.J., how many are there? 6? Okay, five more to go, buddy. Bang up job taking Star Trek even further away from the point than the intro to Star Trek Enterprise did (it's been a looonngg rooooadddd. getting from there to here). There's no way you could muck up Star Wars. Ask George Lucas, he says it's basically Star Trek for kids without any science and just the fun stuff! Actually, don't ask George Lucas. We don't even want his input, I mean look at the Phantom Menace, what does he know about Star Wars anyway ("lolz," latte sip). Well, one sure-fire way to not muck up is to just do the same thing again! If it's already been done, do it again! And even if someone else has already cashed in and it's been redone? Do it again! So JJ, for Episode VIII (or V or maybe it'll be back to I for some reason), when you make the feature length trailer, we're gonna need a winter planet for these AT-AT walker toys. And in the short length trailer, we need a two second quick shot of a snow planet and a walker stepping down and an X wing flying past the camera. That X Wing will be on screen for at least 9 frames, so make sure you spend a few hundred grand on having them build a model.
This movie does not fail and is a success. That is undeniable, but the fact remains, it really seriously is a perfect example of at least half of what is wrong with movies in the modern day and age. The production value, editing, cinematography, special fx, cg stuff, all was absolutely amazing. It really did have a fantastic look, that makes Star Wars come through visually better than EVER before, but guess what? It doesn't have any significance. The movie is not just predictable, it is totally unoriginal, stale, dumbed-down, empty, and really feels like they are screwing you over and laughing like you just won't notice. Look at Harrison Ford and Carrie Fischer in the movie, look very closely at their eyes. Seem like they are not taking it seriously and laughing at you?