Star Wars is Dead

Rating: 4/10 (21 December 2015)

The Force Awakens Rant. So I watched Star Wars The Force Awakens again last night. Just because I had to make sure I didn't like it. WARNING SPOILERS, even though the spoilers are predictable and lame. The first 30 minutes of the movie is amazing. You get that Star Wars feeling and actually care about the new characters. Right about the time Han Solo enters the film, things surprising start dragging. The plot starts becoming convenient and predictable, and I'm not even talking about the major plot points the film rips off from Episode 4 and 5 and even 6. Safe is a perfect way to describe this film. Safe and boring. I didn't even care when they were taking out the super mega Deathstar, and I don't even think Jar Jar Abrams gave a s%&t. Who knows? Maybe it isn't his fault. Maybe Disney told him to remake Episode 4 because they do not respect Star Wars fans enough to give them an actual movie. This wasn't a movie, it was propaganda begging Star Wars fans to like the new cast and new direction by treating us like babies and sandwiching in nostalgia in between recycled plot-points. And the character of Rey. She was likable until she became a Mary Sue. I'm glad what's his name had the balls to call her out on it because no other critic did. She became an unstoppable Jedi Master within seconds and just because we're all guessing she was probably trained by Luke as a child; but that doesn't make it any less boring or believable to watch. The light-saber fight between Kylo Ren and Rey is just laughable. I'm sure Rey is supercharged with the Force or whatever other bullshit but the fight wasn't believable to watch on the big-screen. Strong female characters are one thing. Watching Uma Thurman kick butt all over Kill Bill one and two is believable because she is a strong female character based on something called character development. The movie was just lazy. After the first 30 minutes, it was just lazy and bad filmmaking. The reviews of the film are bulls%&t. It isn't anywhere near as good as Episode 4-6 or even Episode 3 for that matter. I wonder if the hype-train was this bad with Phantom Menace? The Force Awakens isn't a Star Wars movie. It is Star Wars fan-fiction at best. And don't even get me started on Kylo Ren. At least BB-8 was good. Star Wars is dead.