Episode VII: Just good enough to continue the financial exploitation, AKA we're going to build a yuuuge Death Star and the fans are going to pay for it bigly

Rating: 5/10 (3 January 2016)

Lets start with the fact that surprisingly, the movie is not "a total disaster" as Donald Trump would say. It manages to entertain and in some minor ways surprise. But lets face it, if anyone says this is the episode seven they were hoping for, you can probably bet they are employed in some degree by the Walt Disney Corporation. Even George Lucas isn't a fan of this flick, but he has room to complain after selling out Star Wars to Disney, and making the prequel trilogy (ie Jar Jar Binks and Darth Vader's classic "NOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo".
But as much as we all hoped Disney would succeed, this is what they came up with?! 1. A plot ripped not from the expanded universe that Disney tossed aside, but straight from a New Hope. Death Star with critical weakness that will blow it up, and search for droid with plans. The only difference between the rebel death star command center and the resistance death star command center is that Leia looks older.
2. Kylo Ren is a colossal wuss. We all would have been happier is he either kept his helmet on the whole time or died at the end of the film.
3. Han Solo's DEATH is dramatically anti-climactic. Colored only by Chewie's reaction, which barely saves the scene.
4. The new Supreme Leader is hilarious not mysterious, basically just Golem from Lord of the Rings enlarged on an Abe Lincoln style chair.
5. The First Order's General Hux is like a bratty kid and a pathetic replacement to Thrawn in the EU.
In sum, Disney, and JJ Abrams should be lauded for making a new Star Wars film without over-using CGI and stupid characters to make it a kids flick. But whatever accolades they have coming should be substantially outweighed by the calamitous decision to abandon the Expanded Universe in favor of making a New Hope remake that barely holds water. Sadly, the mass marketed picture will likely only serve to encourage more films in this terrible direction.