A Long Time Ago . . .

Rating: 1/10 (16 December 2015)

... but somehow it's unfortunately real in the present. I am completely shocked. My worst concerns came true. But to be honest to myself: what should i have expected from the master of empty and shallow mystery boxes, Jar Jar Abrams?? The talentless hack who gave us completely retarded movies like Super8 (train wreck) or Star Trek (Power Rangers on Warp speed)
Remember the discussion about the childish stupid design of Kylo Ren's light saber? This was one of the first hints, how badly Jar Jar Abrams gonna screw this up .
Everything that was halfway plausible in the original movies (no Midi-chlorians, of course)is now crippled to a chowder of references, obviously with the purpose to expand the range of the target audience from 5-95 y. (To be fair, yes Lucas did similar by including the Ewoks, but it made sense somehow).
Here, everything comes from the "wouldn't it be cool if" think tank. E.g. Han Solo is wearing exactly the same clothes he did 32 years ago. Yeah, how cool is that? Did i mention the stupid light saber design? The large Millennium Falcon escaping from much smaller Tie-Fighters by flying through narrow caverns where the Tie-Fighters crash but not the Falcon. BTW there is no reason, why the Falcon should fly into a Star Destroyer wreck to shake the Tie-Fighters whilst the Falcon can fly much faster than any Tie-Fighter, etc....
Well there's a lot more of it. Wait until you realize, what happened to Luke Skywalker, mysteryyy...not!
This is not your father's Star Wars ... the last time they said this about the reboot of the beloved Star Trek franchise, it was the end of the franchise as we knew it.