Pay the Price for Your Lack of Vision

Rating: 4/10 (30 December 2019)

Following the generally liked Force Awakens and the divisive Last Jedi, Rise of Skywalker comes to end the Star Wars sequel trilogy, and supposedly the "Skywalker Saga." JJ Abrams returns as director, so it was expected to play it safe. Rise of Skywalker plays it extremely safe. The best way to describe this movie is that it's a turd with icing and sprinkles on it. It looks nice on the outside but cut it open and there's nothing but crap. Virtually every scene in the movie is ripped straight out of a previous Star Wars movie, Avengers: Endgame, or Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. It even rips off the "I am Iron Man" scene from Endgame.
The main problem with this movie is that it tries to please every part of this fractured fanbase, and it ends up as a jumbled, convoluted mess as a result. It spends the first half of the movie undoing virtually everything Last Jedi set up, for better or for worse. It reveals Rey's parentage as a Palpatine, Snoke's true identity, completely changes Luke on every level, and makes it that the lightspeed ram is a one-in-a-million chance of working. If you like Last Jedi, you won't like that it got rid of everything it set up. If you don't like it, it feels like too little, too late, especially in the scene with Luke. That being said; it feels like two movies stuffed into one: JJ's Last Jedi the do-over, and Episode 9. It appeals to the nostalgia crowd and general audiences by bringing back Lando and being filled with references to the originals and big action scenes. It goes for the Prequel fans by getting Hayden Christiansen and Ewan McGregor back. It even tries to please the Reylos, the worst of the fanbase. The scene at the end when Rey and Ben Solo make out is possibly the most cringeworthy cinematic moment of 2019.
Since it feels like two movies stuffed into one, the entire first half feels extremely rushed. A lot of the stuff like Hux's betrayal, Finn being force sensitive, and Leia's past with the Jedi all felt like things that would've been set up in Abram's Last Jedi and could have been good. Some stuff is just plain dumb. The fake out death with Chewie was inexcusable. They don't even pretend he's dead for a minute. At least Batman v Superman had the courtesy to keep Superman dead for a good 20 minutes. What did Finn want to tell Rey? Rey's force powers come out of nowhere, like she's Neo from The Matrix. If force healing works like that, then Obi-Wan should've saved Qui-Gon, Anakin should've saved Padme, so on and so forth. It even contradicts the other sequels. If Rey is a Palpatine, why did the Skywalker saber call out to her? Speaking of, where did Maz get the saber, anyway? If Snoke was the Emperor, why did he want Rey dead in Last Jedi? There are too many loose ends and plot holes to count.
The biggest, most fatal flaw of this movie is the Emperor. By the sole nature of his survival, the sacrifice of Anakin Skywalker has been rendered entirely meaningless. But hey, no one's ever really gone, so maybe he'll be back in Episode X. This trilogy retroactively ruined the originals and even the prequels by resetting the conflict to "empire vs rebels." The victory at the end of Return of the Jedi was short lived, and Luke, Leia, and Han became a suicidal hobo, a failed politician, and a deadbeat dad. This is a problem with all three sequels, but Rise of Skywalker drives it home. The entire move of bringing back the Emperor reeks of desperation, as we know Kylo is an insufficient villain on his own.
Hot take: The absolute worst scene in this movie is the ending on Tatooine. It's that one final gut punch that completes the trilogy's ruining of the Originals. The image of Luke standing looking at the two suns in A New Hope signifies his desire to get away from the planet, and a desire for adventure. Bringing his lightsaber there completely contradicts that. Leia's only connection to that place is that she was briefly enslaved there by Jabba. And Anakin's lightsaber is buried in the sand, on the one planet he would never go to. That's like if Harry Potter died and they left his wand under the stairs at the Dursley's house.
Additionally, all the Skywalkers are dead, their lightsabers are buried in a shallow grave, and a Palpatine has taken their name and legacy as her own. Rey calling herself a Skywalker is dumb. She should've said that she's just "Rey." Even calling herself Organa would make more sense.
While there is a lot to hate about it, there is some good stuff. BB-8 is adorable. They didn't ruin Lando, which is a pleasant surprise. The visual effects are spectacular. The ships, planets, battles, it all looks great. All of the new planets look great as well. The lightsaber duels between Rey and Kylo, despite feeling like they have zero stakes, are good battles that are reminiscent of the great duels of the Prequels. Adam Driver is one of the best actors out there right now, and he's fantastic. The scenes of Kylo being a villain at the beginning are cool. Kylo with his helmet on still looks awesome. The relationship between Rey and Leia is as good as it can be after Carrie Fisher's passing. That being said, her death scene gets a pass. The scene with Han was excellent, because it parallels something from this trilogy rather than take it from another. And for the last time, John Williams knocks it out of the park with another stellar soundtrack.
The whole sequel trilogy is just one massive disappointment. Looking back at how hyped Force Awakens was and seeing this as the end result is just sad. Everything was there: the original cast returning, a fantastic new cast of actors, incredible visual effects, and a whole new opportunity to tell a new story, and they blew it. The problem is that there was no plan. You can see fractured pieces of Abram's whole trilogy here, but Last Jedi completely threw a wrench in it, at the expense of the rest of the trilogy. Did Last Jedi ruin Star Wars? Maybe. LucasFilm should not have let Force Awakens come out without a solid plan for the next two movies. That was the mistake. This is trilogy is one of the biggest missed opportunities in the history of cinema.