lol @ you, Star Wokes

Rating: 1/10 (23 December 2019)

They have ruined something that has stood for decades in its own class, without peer.
I used to be one of the biggest star wars fans around. Before the first movie came out in 1977, I had read the book at least a dozen times. The marketing for the first movie was pure genius, and the movie delivered. It was great. The book was great. It was a great story and very entertaining to my young mind.
The Empire Strikes back was good. Good enough to not disappoint. The Walkers and other Empire weapons were fantastic. Return of the Jedi was good as well. Not great, but good enough. Holographic projection actually is a thing now.
Rise of Skywalker is a joke. This is not about Star Wars, it is about... I will be hones, I have no idea what it is about. Certainly isn't about the Star Wars universe, which was about the struggle of good versus evil. Everything has become so twisted in an attempt to make it seem like things happening today and to make social justice statements. This movie is about the struggle of not wholly likeable people against unbelievable caricatures they of improbable evil who aspire to things no one wants to do actually, evil or not.
And the plot is ridiculous. Star Wars was a fantasy, but spacecraft existed, space existed, god and evil existed, so things were within the realm of believability. Rise of Skywalker is so improbably written only a child might be swayed to entertain the premises of the story as being vaguely possible.
Imagine a story about a tree who aspires to learn the German language, but the old, Medieval German spoken in the days of Roman conquest. Now imagine why you would care.
Star Wokes is a better name, and watching video of the guy pooping in the San Francisco grocery store aisle is more entertaining.
I am not sure what they will be marketing from this episode, a Darth Vader mask rip-off? There is nothing here that wasn't taken from the original trilogy, except a decent storyline.
I thought that having a wireless data transmission terminal that required no authentication built on top of the Empire's repository for it's most secret information was a stupid plot development.
Until I saw this movie.