Contrived Mess - Failed Course Correct

Rating: 3/10 (20 December 2019)

Please excuse the poorly structured review. This Movie is just a mess and as such my thoughts are equally so. Where to start?
From the opening text scroll this Movie wrote its own failure. Bringing back Emperor Palpatine completely ruins the Original Trilogy. To be fair the previous installment had already ruined the legacy of Luke Skywalker and painted the story in to a corner but this Movie in no way helped correct this major misstep.
The Force powers displayed by the characters have little or no basis in lore. There's no evolution showed to explain the new found Force Abilities. An exposition of text cannot make this OK. The Force not only allows you to FaceTime (or perhaps ForceTime) but now it is possible to transport physical objects via the Force, WHAT!? It is also possible to not only Heal wounds but bring back people from death, and the cost? Nothing at times and Your own death when convenient to the plot. Rey is shown Levitating in the beginning and does not use this ability later to get her out of a situation because? Plot convenience. Its just absolute Idiocy, and insulting to any Logic.
Everything is so contrived, blatantly so and defies any Logic.

The Resistance just happened to get a message from a First Order Spy Revealing some critical information which leads to Palpatine (A mechanically life supported corpse???) setting about this whole Movie
For some reason Po ' Light Jump Skips' to evade the first order instead of just fleeing normally, Why???
Kylo Meets Palpatine and it is revealed he was Puppeteering Snoke all along. He has been in hiding all these years building an Armada of Star Destroyers all capable of destroying planets
Rey does a 'Rocky Montage' of her training but then gets fed up
Rey realises she just happens to have the location to a device that can locate Palpatine
Rey, Chewbacca, C3PO, BB8, Finn and Po embark on a journey to a forbidden planet where...
Kylo Force grabs via ForceTime a necklace that reveals Rey's location (this happens twice in the Movie)
Lando happens to be there to save them from being discovered
Nevermind, they get attacked and as a result get trapped in quicksand/ sucked underground/ find the thing they were looking for
Its a Dagger that C3PO can read but is prohibited to translate
They come across the skeleton of who tooks away Rey's parents but then...
Theres a Giant Worm ready to kill them, But Rey notices its wounded and 'Force Heals' it and it makes them a way out from underground.
They happen to find The ship of the dead skeleton??? (in a inhabited planet that has gone completely unnoticed in the open)
This ship even after a decade or more is still operational
They are about to leave when Rey senses Kylo Ren approacing???
Chewbacca gets captured, Rey fights Kylo's Tie Fighter???
Finn tells Rey Chewbacca has been captured and is being transported away
Rey and Keylo play Force Tug of War with the Transport Ship
Rey then spontaneously combusts lightning from her fingers and destroys the Transport Ship in turn killing Chewbacca (who had the Dagger)
Rey and co escape they are distraught at the loss of Chewbacca, also they lost the dagger but C3PO has the information from the dagger in his memory
Po happens to know someone who can reprogram C3PO to divulge the information
They go to another planet to meet this person and reprogram C3PO
Kylo follows them in his Star destroyer where we find Chewbacca isnt dead but actually captured
Rey senses this so they need to go and rescue him
Po's contact happens to have a First order Captains token/Clearence code to get onboard
They go to rescue Chewbacca where Rey seperates from Finn and Po
Rey is drawn to Kylo's chamber while he in on the planets surface looking for her
Finn and Po rescue Chewbacca, but then get captured, but then get rescued by the First order Spy, who then dies moments later??? WHAT???
Kylo and Rey ForceTime again, and Kylo again discovers where she is via Force Object Grab/ Teleport???
Rey regroups with Finn, Po and co and all is in place, decoded Dagger via Reprogrammed C3PO, and recovered Chewbacca and actual dagger...
That leads them to the Crashed Death Star and the Dagger is a map to the actual location of device with the location of Palpatine???
Rey just happens to stand in exactly the right spot to see that the dagger has the outline of the crashed Death Star which pinpoints where to go???
She goes there alone and finds the device and has a vision
Just then Kylo happens to find Rey, He destroys the device Rey Finds
Kylo was sent to Kill Rey So She doesnt become a Jedi???? as commanded by Palpatine. (But then later Palpatine wants Rey to Kill Palpatine and Take over as Sith Emperor???) But Kylo has his own plans???
He reveals she is Palpatines Grand Daughter
They Fight for some reason???
Rey Kills Kylo after Leia distacts him for a moment, but then heals him and brings him back???
Kylo is now good after talking to a memory ghost of Han, he becomes Ben Solo/Skywalker and throws his Red Light Sabre away???
Rey just goes off to Achto beacuse shes a Palpatine and doesnt want to be Evil

-Luke's Force Ghost gives Rey a Pep Talk and a new light sabre, a new ship, and tells her she has a way to find Palpatine

Rey some how broadcast this location to the whole Galaxy from her X wing???
Everyone makes it to Palpatines secret planet
The resistance have to take out a Comms Tower in order to ground the Star destroyer fleet, but then plot twist the First Order switch off the Tower and now Comms will be relayed from the Lead Destroyer...
This plot allows for The Resistence to launch a Ground Attack on the Surface/ Hull on said destroyer, Insert Alien Horse Cavalry charge scene. Why? Does this make sense plot wise? No, "But think of the spectacle" - I assume the writers thought. BORING!
Rey meets Palpatine and plays along for a bit until Kylo/ Ben shows up
She Force Telegrams the Light Sabre ghost Luke gave her to Kylo/Ben
Kylo and Rey are a Force 'Diad' - a Force Yin and Yang, simply put A Force Power Couple.
Palpatine discovers this and uses their life force to heal himself, he is now 100%
Palpatine Slaps Kylo/Ben down a hole
Palpatine Lightnings the whole world and starts to bring down the resistance ships
Rey confronts Palpatine - stupid words are said
Palpatine then ligntnings Rey, Rey deflects/ reflects the lightning and Kills Palpatine with his own lightning??? (He could stop 'Lightninging' and Force Push Her down the hole too!!!)
Resistance Win, Rey now identifies as a Skywalker - The End!!!

Anything good to say? Despite all the nonsensical garbage there were a one or two instances that I would say were good. Rey's reaction to thinking she killed Chewbacca was well portrayed by Daisy Ridley, I must say it did strike an emotional chord (even though moments later this was negated). Also when the unexpected news of Leia's death gets revealed to Chewbacca, Finn and Po also was quite a emotional moment. So basically all the Low/ Sad moments.
My condolences to those who read through that, and more so to those who actually watched the movie. This movie has killed Star Wars in my opinon. Its just depressing, none of the light sabre fights were even choreographed well. None of the 'big' action set pieces are visually impressive. Such a Shame.