A confidence trick of a movie

Rating: 4/10 (22 December 2019)

JJ Abrams is now confirmed as - albeit one with good intentions I would say. But, he doesn't have an original creative bone in his body. This film is an absolute mess - though for some the emotionally manipulative script and overblown CGI spectacle will leave them feeling like they enjoyed this, when really it just kept their attention.
And to do the latter, JJ makes the most caffeinated, ridiculously fast paced Star Wars film of all time. He speeds though, hoping you won't stop to consider how ridiculous a lot of what is unfolding really is - not least that SOMEHOW the damn Emperor survived the ROTJ (electrocuted, thrown down a vast hole, then blown up minutes later in the Death Star's destruction). This last plot point should be enough to make any die hard Star Wars fan suspicious...but apparently as mentioned if you tug their heartstrings cynically, assault them with nostalgia, and keep the pace at monster energy level they will forgive this. Which, to me, speaks of the lowered standards of modern day cinema goers. And maybe that video game plotting has become acceptable in films. The exposition in this is, frankly, laughable.
But the thing that irks me the most is the aforementioned lack of creativity. This really is just a bunch of macguffin, video game fetch quests until you can see that it really is just ROTJ 2.0. Even the Emperor snarls "Strike me down". I couldn't frickin' believe my ears. The way Abrams spams you with CGI spectacle is, again, so unoriginal and badly done that you just become numb. There are some beautiful sights in the film...but the space stuff is terrible. And, in Star Wars, that's just not acceptable. Like it or lump it, a good portion of what made the originals great was the use of models to make some of the best space action ever put to film. And I would say the end space battle in Return of the Jedi is STILL the gold standard for exciting space battles committed to film. I have no idea what was going on in most of the space scenes - JJ thinks throwing the camera upside down, or throwing the angle around makes these scenes work, but really once again he's just 'doing stuff' because he doesn't have any vision or eye for framing at all. He shoots stuff like a university film student would. On too much caffeine.
Overall, this film will likely keep your attention, but your ability to like it will be down to how much you can keep an open mind, let it off its various inadequacies, and unoriginality, and your appreciation of nostalgia. I enjoyed some scenes. Adam Driver was awesome as usual. The other actors did pretty good with what they had.
But, disappointment on a grand scale is the feeling I was left with, even despite very low expectations going in.