The Demise of Skywalker

Rating: 1/10 (22 December 2019)

I'm going to just gloss over the main points of this dumpster fire because if I don't this review could be a book. No explanation of how the Emperor survived the explosion of the Death Star over Endor. No explanation of WHY if he can make clones he's still using his crippled, old body when he could CLONE a new one. Palpatine is now Overdog from Space Hunter Adventures in the Forbidden Zone with a mechanical arm shoved up his posterior because you know, in Star Wars there aren't prosthetic bodies like Vader had....oh the stupid...but I digress. He's also a Space Vampire like Overdog that can drain life force to restore himself yet he didn't do that in ANY OTHER STAR WARS movie he was in. I nearly choked on my coffee when I saw him flinch away from Rey making a cross with two light sabers (like he's friggin Dracula). He uses force lightening to "attack" the Resistance fleet...nice new power we've never seen before. What is he Thanos now? No explanation of ANY of the RIDICULOUS force powers in this movie in general. Nobody trains, nobody has to work to achieve these powers, they just get them like some kind of Super Hero movie. The force is apparently a Star Trek transporter now that transports an object to Kylo Ren from Mary Sue Rey (who is God-Mod-Level Mary Sue in this) which allows Klyo to find her. Oh and Princess Leia was a Jedi, had a lightsaber, and can use the force like a master Jedi...because why not? She also so dies in the most lame way. Snoke was Palpatine's creation and he has new replacement Snokes in Jars (yeah...stupid). Also, Star Destroyers now have a planet-killing beam cannon even though they're only Imperial I style and not the size of an Eclipse or Sovereign class SSD. This fleet is hidden under ice, who knows where the crew came from, or how they were fed, none of it is explained and so it just comes off as cheap and contrived. There's a lot more, but the main reason this is a 1-star for me is because it totally makes everything that Luke did to save Anakin a moot point and a wasted endeavor. Why bother with these sequels if all these did was trash what the original trilogy established? The prequels were not great, but they didn't destroy any of what came before. They were original stories that told us how Anakin became Vader and in that they succeeded. In this Disney Trilogy everything that was created in the first 6-films is now pointless. None of it matters because Palpatine won. He succeeded in killing Kylo Ren (the last actual Skywalker) and wiping out Luke's legacy. Rey is Palpatine's granddaughter, so her taking Luke's last name (she just declares herself a Skywalker), taking his moisture farm, taking his X-wing, and essentially taking away and destroying his legacy makes me think this movie should have been titled "Demise of Skywalker".