Our lack of faith has disturbed me!

Rating: 1/10 (18 January 2017)

This movie wasn't bad because it was bad, which caused me to write a review about it! No it was just so bad that it left me flabbergasted wondering how the hell could this have made so much money!
To be honest I always had a dislike for Star Wars. The weird creatures, the stupid costumes and the inkling thought that its popular but simplistic good vs bad plot, may have been a factor in causing the American people to support the 2002 Iraq war blindly, have made me always steer away from watching it. But the sheer amount of merchandise, trivia, commercials for reboots, web pages etc. Had caused me some doubt on my prejudices. I once read that there are more web pages about Star Wars than there is about WWII. In the Netherlands people are obsessed about WWII so maybe the movie should be better than the historical narrative behind it. However.....
When I finally began to watch: cringe set in immediately, followed by annoyance, followed by sleepiness followed by a same loss of faith in mankind as when you watch a documentary on genocide, or when you wake up and realize that the world is a big fat lie, and everything that you believed turns out to be utter bullshit. This film was bad because
1: There was no character or plot introduction, not even a simple save the cat or kill the dog plot device (like in House of Cards) to make you connect with the characters. Instead it begins with boom two Lego ships firing some lasers peeuw, two dumb robots saying random stuff. , robots flee to random planet peeuw. Only 15 minutes into the movie are we introduced to Luke sky walker and during those 15 minutes started to feel asleep. Gladioter also starts with a battle, but at least they let Maximus say some lines so we know what kind of character he is. 2: The worst, cheesiest and most infantile lines and dialogues I have ever heard. 3:The worst acting ever (except that from Harisson Ford ) even for 70's standards this was bad. people die all around them and there are no emotions. The main characters was the most annoying actor I have ever seen except for that girl from the series Revolution. 4: Really inane science fiction that makes you scratch your head all the time and make you wonder, would a woman still cook in the kitchen or a man work when there are robots around? There is no thinking behind it just some fantasy landscape in space with Furies, the Waffen-SS and an actress that doesn't wear a bra under her costume. 5: The golden rule 'show don't tell' is ignored here and instead we have characters saying everything they think or feel and even explaining you plot-points like they do in a cartoon. 6:Enormous amounts of plot holes and things happening because the script forces it through, no logic at all. A prime example is that scene on the deathstar when a stormtrooper releases the robots because of a very weak excuse in order for them to save the protagonists from the garbage dump. Or when Obi wan refuses to fight Darth Vader and gets killed for no apparent reason. 7: The lack of a plot, character developments and a reasoning of why the characters do what they do. Why is the empire evil? no explanation. Instead the empire is given some WWII German inspired uniforms and hide behind masks,
Then there is this lame half explained quest of a whinebaby to become a jedi.( Which feels like it was put there almost as an afterthought. 8: The worst antagonists in movie history ever. Those storm troopers and imperial commanders act unbelievably dumb and inept. Stormtroopers never take cover they just stand there and blast away, they also don't hit anything. If you put this army of plastic Lego guys against some football hooligans high on speed and armed with bats and pocket knifes, they would all die in seconds. The Death star is filled with holes. Despite laser technology and super tech computers they can't hit a barn door. The most obvious solution for the empire is to keep up blowing up planets till the rebels surrender, but hey then you don't have a lame plot about a teenager saving the day. 9: Really bad sesame street costumes, kitschy plastic looking armor and sets, the battleships looked like they were made out of Lego. 10:Defiance of physics in space, holes are blasted into a space ship but there is no air leaking from it. Newton's laws of motion and gravity are partially rejected. Fire explosions in a vacuum universe. 11: The story plot arc doesn't make sense, Luke's family is killed, okay that set's him on his course. But why is he suddenly so dedicated to the rebel cause that he calls Han Solo on not joining it. What that happens when he sees Obi wan basically commit suicide?
Some reviewer wrote that seeing this movie made him feel like being interrogated by the KGB I had exactly that same feeling. I can't believe that this movie has made billions of dollars. How is it possible that this trash has gained the same cultural status symbol as the Iliad, Shakespeare or Harry Potter in our modern day society? At least with Harry Potter I could understand why people loved it, but with this! And what does it say about Americans when Star Wars is put on the same level as the Wizard as Oz as a hallmark of American society? I have no answer for this, but really this movie is crap don't waste your time on it despite millions of dweebs writing on the internet that you must and should. Sight sometimes I question the sanity of modern day society, and the popularity of this trash is the ultimate example of why I harbor such suspicions. should!