"Nooooooo" : why did this film have to be made?

Rating: 5/10 (21 May 2005)

It's a paradox, really. This movie feels like a mere imitation, a story without depth or feeling - and yet, it's imitating itself. The problem is that we know the story too well and so all that this film does is animate (in a far too CG-dependent way) what we already know - without the subtlety, the wit, the complex characters that the Episode 4, 5, and 6 provided.
If this film was considered on its own, without the prestige of the Star Wars name and franchise (earned solely from the original trilogy, of course), it would hardly stand up to even some of the more mediocre heartless action flicks this year.
Of course the excessive use of computer graphics indicates a rather large budget, and while I recognize the skill that goes into such effects, every scene (not to mention every frame) does not necessarily need a computer graphic as a centrepiece. My least favourite: the droid general with an honourable mention going to the ridiculous screeching lizard that Obi-Wan was riding.
The characters are frustratingly stale. I am unconvinced when Anakin becomes Darth Vader. I mean that the Vader that ends Episode 3 is not the Vader I know in Episode 4. It's rather a let down to his character that his main motivation was saving Padme ("Noooooo"), it just didn't make sense - he should be about power and power only - not a girl who's sole purpose in the film is to wear one abstract costume after another and look worried, waiting up for Anakin to get home and act shiftily/unconvincingly.
It's like a medieval passion play where the audience knows the story and its moral already, the players reciting the predicted lines, going through the motions until their destined departure. It all just feels like a poor rendition, desperately needing some life, something other than the parts we all know by heart. The film tries at points, grasping to keep doubts about the whole project away from our somewhat bored minds - ie. the mount doom-like final battle. These attempts really just made the whole thing less credible. Some scenes were absolutely unreal and not in a good way.
A final thought: I wish that the original trilogy could have be left untouched but now, alas, it is tainted by a second-rate prequel trilogy that in its very existence dispels the charm and the mystery that made the originals so exceptional. The deterministic aura of the whole film is inescapable, but did the destination have to be reached with such a rigid and uninspiring flight path?
Luke, Leia, Han, Obi-Wan, and Vader all deserve more.