Revenge of the Theatre Seats

Rating: 6/10 (21 May 2005)

30 minutes into this film I found myself thinking that I'll have a really exciting review to pass onto friends. "The new Star Wars has the best effects yet!" And that is where the excitement ended.
More than 1.5 hours later after many in the audience had left the theater early - a new low for Lucas films - I joined the audience in stumbling towards the exits with numb back and legs, wondering how this movie could "only be", two hours and ten minutes long!
Without a doubt the film series that gave birth to so many aspects of present day special effects technology had to top everything that came in the wake of its 3-decade legacy, just to make the grade. And this movie does break new ground in spacial effects realism. In a good cinema the opening scenes will have some viewers grappling with aerial-spacial phobias.
That said, Lucas must have invested in 'name' actors to sell the film, because the talent of some of the best and brightest names in the industry never makes it to the screen. There is precious little dialogue, and all of it is delivered with less emotion than a weather forecast. Some of the more intimate and human interactive scenes are shot in profile or behind the speakers. So after lousy script and pitiful acting, anything the high-paid talent might add to the scene with facial expressions, was left on the cutting room floor.
And where is the humor that characterized the earlier Star Wars flics? There is not a witty line, not even a humorous corny line, nor comedy scene in the film.
What's left? Action, effects, and plot line? Yeah. The audience is whalloped with wave after wave of action scenes, all shot in dreary lighting to make sure that no one forgets that this is the serious Star Wars flic. Most of these scenes could have been edited for impact.
OVERALL EFFECT ON THE AUDIENCE: special effects = 9, good action sequences = 8, plot = 6, visually confusing, excessively loud action sequences = -5, excessive number of loud action action sequences = -5, intelligence-insulting dialogue = -3, lack of acting = -4 TOTAL = 6