Meh when it could have been amazing

Rating: 1/10 (23 May 2005)

Oh, my how much better this movie could have been. First of all, one shred of character development could have been spent on Vader at all in the the entire trilogy. I mean really, isn't that what its supposed to be about? I would have liked to have seen EP1 compacted into 45 min and combined with a shorter EP2, leaving two more movies to develop and fully flesh out who Vader is. I've seen all three prequel EPs several times and still am mystified as to why Anakin isn't given more than cliché'd you-know-he's-evil-but-no-one-else-knows to work with.
Secondly, are Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman not the most miscast actors ever? Maybe they would have been better if they had been given more to work with script wise, but Portman's inflection (NY meets valley girl) is all wrong for the movie, and Hayden, well, Hayden acts as much as my coat rack acts. He should know that staring out of the tops of your eyes for 2.5 hours is not emoting. Oh, and i'm not kidding about the script, man that was some clunky writing. I read that George Lucas had trouble getting it out... it shows:
Anakin: 'You're so beautiful.' Padme: 'It's only because I'm so in love.' Anakin: 'No, it's because I'm so in love with you.'
That line made me literally cringe in the theatre with its badness. That whole scene in that walkway next to the pillar is full of bad dialog and horrible camera cuts. High Schoolers could have put that together better.
Given all that, Obi-Wan is played excellently by Ewan McGregor, script limitations and all. I really felt what he was feeling in the last scene, even though hey-my-clothes-spontaneously-combust Anakin almost ruined the moment. And Palpatine is pretty cool, but the relationship between him and Anakin should have been more drawn out.
This movie could have been so gut-wrenchingly good. I gave it a chance. It failed... badly...
D+