Senseless? Are you?

Rating: 1/10 (7 June 2005)

The capital letters aren't big enough to emphasise the shock and disbelief of the following sentence: HOW CAN ANYONE LIKE THIS FILM!!?
Lucas redeemed? Exuberant mood? Coup de grace? This movie was the most degrading heap of nonsense ever committed to the movie reel! Its awful, abysmal and atrocious on all, conventional and unconventional levels.
Lets begin with CGI. Too much of it. Its hard to spot a scene unruffled by some pesky and annoying droid or a badly designed alien doing something along the lines of beeping stupidly or ambling around the screen and showing off the "great interaction between human actors and computer generated ones". Rubbish. Watching this film is like watching Shrek with few human actors, although acting is so wooden you'll be hard pressed to spot the real actors. Which brings me to the next point, acting. Who do you think got paid more, the guy who created CGI or Hayden Christensen? Where on Earth did they dig this guy up? He can't act to save his life! And what about Samuel L. Jackson, Natalie Portman and Ewan McGregor?! There is no facial expressions, emotions and no chemistry, a love story is supposed to have...oooh I don't know, some love in it, maybe? Padme and Anakin haven't kissed or touched each other once!! Where is the love?! I know a Jedi is supposed to be an emotionless-kinda dude but for God sake, have some conviction on your face when you do stuff! And as for spewing out Lucas' script-committed garbage, please don't. The dialogue then.....George Lucas can't write. He didn't write the script for "Empire Strikes Back" and what a coincidence! Its considered to be the best instalment of Star Wars saga!!! Here is a tip George, instead of hiring some hapless yoyo to generate Obi-Wan Kenobi riding a giant lizard(where on God's green Earth did that saddle come from?!), how about you take that money and give it to a professional script writer? Or just give it to me as a matter of fact, I can write a better script of a toilet roll with a coat hanger. Seriously though guys, did none of you cringe in disgust whenever one of the actors opened their mouth to speak? Final point, the story. Correct me if I am wrong but, the story is complete tripe. Let's see, loads of loose ends thrown and tied together with CGI in hope that it would all work somehow. A lot of scenes serve no purpose to the movie overall and seem to be there just to introduce characters to the whole pastiche. But despite such a quick and patchy job it still leaves a lot of questions unanswered, such questions as: If Yoda is so damn great at detecting even the slightest emotional vibes how could he not sense a conspiracy coming? And why was Anakin persuaded so easily with stupid persuasions? The most promising Jedi, the chosen one seems to be as dumb as a mule and twice as bad at acting.
The whole thing is just bad, Bad, BAD! There is no soul or sense of fun to be found anywhere. The originals had a sense of humour, charm, chemistry between characters. The originals were not bogged down by CGI. The originals had a point and relevance to modern life. The last three on the other hand had none of the above, and whats beyond me is how did this movie got 7+ stars on this site. Star Wars fans should be crying in shame while George Lucas bathes in millions he made from this drivel. P.S.: Darth Vader was reduced to fighting cleaners in Burger King to promote the goodies for this movie in the latest commercials. You know the movie would suck if you see that sort of thing going on.