A tragic ending in every sense.

Rating: 4/10 (19 May 2005)

Three is really a magic number. Three legs make a tripod stand securely. There are three primary colours. Martin Luther King said "I have a dream" three times. The third in any set is vital; the master stroke of a combination.
I'll show you how this technique is used. Star Wars is crap. Star Wars is crap. Star Wars is crap.
You'd expect 'Star Wars Episode Three: Revenge of the Sith' to be the leg that holds up those other two hapless excuses for cinema we saw in one and two. Too bad it's not.
Don't get me wrong - I'm a big Star Wars fan. I download fan films. I can name five planets, at least. I refer casually to "The holy trilogy'. But I won't blindly say this movie makes up for the last two, because it doesn't.
In a series synonymous with cinematic twists, the big one here is that there aren't any. It comes off as a bloated franchise desperately tying loose ends and bustling through the expected routine plot. Action is an excuse for a one-liner, acting is passionless and blue screen, production is of a level you wouldn't swallow from anything not called Star Wars.
Episode III is a modern tragedy with all the correct hallmarks. The movie had the dramatic potential of any playwright's daydream, but Shakespeare's tragedies didn't have to sell merchandise. I couldn't help but feel, under all the lame quips, flashy CGI and token politicking, the genius of the plot was weeping.
The trilogy ends up a lacklustre, entirely predictable meander towards the actually-interesting original three. Capitalise on ILM and see this movie as big and as loud as you can, or you're wasting your time. Actually no, see it anyway - I mean, how could you not? But find a sugar daddy to take you so you don't have to pay.
Four stars. And that's out of ten.