'Death And Other Minor Ailments'

Rating: 1/10 (5 December 2009)

It started out with a realisation of the expectations I expected. Space battle! Noisy, flashy, happy cuttings editor on drugs. A grandiose hook for the biting off. Fishy audience, indeed.
THE SHAKES: They begin after short exposure to Haydn Christensen. His acting initiated severe stomach crampage. My adrenal gland was not pleased by this. Pulmonary rate increased. This was the normal... This was to be expected.... Character development was again the victim of the Overlook Hotel. My upper lip was to curl at this point. Nasty, thin presentations in the character dept. Think plants. Think VULGARIS LUCASIS.
SEVERE WIND AND DROOLING: Audience in a circular motion is not nice. No satisfactory destination being reached, indeed! Circular motion with bland plottings and a happy cuttings editor on drugs. Laser beam action time. TYPICA! without the L. Performance burial time. TYPICA! without the L. Cardboard cut out time. Nice! Droolage from the lower lip quadrant. Shakeings and droolings. Nice. Ahhh,...Wookie day. Nice! Fart time... Frankenstein reborn. Shock of the century! Laugh of the century! Genocide of all time. Shock factor 10. Repulsings.