If I could cut 5 minutes of footage, this film would be flawless!

Rating: 8/10 (27 May 2005)

This is just me pointing out the flaws. There aren't too many, I really like this movie, but it could have been perfect, and it was extremely close. George Lucas has given up on Yoda's original character, his lines don't contain wisdom, because Geoge Lucas is focused on making his dialect seem reasonable. He failed. But also, Yoda says things way out of his character, but mixes it up, so he says his lines, like Yod would say them, if Yoda was the kind of cat who says. "Hope right, you are." The biggest word in that line is 5 letters. Yoda is better than that. He is the Jedi of Jedis, and teaches the only other surviving Jedi. That's how wise he is. He would never say to Darth Sidious, "Not if anything to say about it I have." That line is a cliché, and it's a cliché in our realm, not a long time ago in a galaxy far far away. It sounds absolutely absurd when he says it. Another thing that I would cut is the dialogue between Chewbacca and Tarfful. When Yoda leaves, he says, "Miss you I will." (Stupid line) and then Tarfful and Chewie exchange grunting groan noises at each other for a whole 5 seconds. For what reason? The editor must have fallen asleep or missed his deadline and scrambled for it or something, because he missed a few spots. I do not want to see the sensitive side of Vader in the bloody respirator-suit. I don't want to see an intense, 3 movie epic transformation of a great character shat upon by one cheesy shot of an 8-year old kid (I know it was pr in a Darth Vader Halloween costume howling at the moon. Honestly, "NOOOOOOO!" What a joke. What a bastardization of what is possibly the greatest franchise in history. At least there weren't any gungans (I'm aware of the fact that he who shall not be named did appear, but not enough to make a real difference). And, I'm just curious, and probably shouldn't speculate. It's probably in the book, but I've not read it, but when Palpatine pulls the name "Darth Vader" out of thin air, did he stop for a while and plan out the fact that "Vader" is German for "Father"? I just wanted to see George Lucas justify renaming Anakin the way he did. I know all the Sith are Darth Whatever, but how does Darth Sidius come up with this stuff? Otherwise, this movie was great. Well, I don' think Yoda should be an action hero. And I don't think R2-D2 should win hand to hand combat between to battle droids. And I think Padme's birth would have been worth the employment of oh... I don't know maybe humans? The birth of the chosen one and his twin sister hardly seems like work for droids. They could have at least picked a droid that was maybe 2 or 3 notches less annoying, but all tiny details aside, this movie was great. I maybe would have liked to not see the security hologram of Anakin killing "younglings" (can't they just be called kids? I swear in episode 1, they used the word "boy". And no, episode 1 does not deserve capital letters.) I thought Episode III was stupendous though. Hayden Chrstensen actually looked very similar to Mark Hamill. Ewan McGregor is even beginning to look like Alec Guiness. Natalie Portman is very fun to look at. And these people all acted well. The evil gungan (no capitals) who shall remain unnamed stayed out of the script where he belongs, but he popped up on screen a few times with the Naboo senate posse making me very, very nervous.
But the movie was good! All my criticisms are very obscure details for the most part, but I have to recognize, that nothing in this world is perfect, not even this movie. There is good and bad to everything, and though my perceived bitterness way lead you to believe I am looking at this movie's "bad" or "dark" side, but I would like you to know that I have sided with the rebels, and my lightsaber will remain blue or green, unless I act in the miniseries and George Lucas says I can have a distinct color like he did to Samuel L. Jackson (who was great!).