A disgrace

Rating: 3/10 (27 May 2005)

Let me start by saying quickly that I am a huge Star Wars fan like many others however I have no problem admitting Ep. 1 & 2 were mediocre films. I thought to myself that if RotS lived up to the story and to the hype that it would be all better. It turns out the effect was the exact opposite. After this installment I will probably never watch the prequels again with their lack of plot progression and clunky conclusion.
The first problem with Revenge of the Sith is the same problem that plagued Ep. 2: TOO MUCH CGI!!!! We don't care about the characters or the story because we have no way of identifying with them! We knew Luke was cold on Hoth and that Tattooine was hot and muggy, we could probably guess what it smelled like, etc. This movie has no aesthetic value whatsoever because there are no aesthetics! Everything is fake so why would it be believable?
Another problem that umbrellas the entire movie is the excruciating acting/directing/writing. Frankly, my first reaction would be to blame Lucas because we all know he can't write dialog. However in this particular case I blame the actors: No one could even pull off ONE line(with the exception of McGregor, Portman and MAYbe Ian McDirmid). I realize the dialog is horrible and feels awkward for the actors but you have to be able to spin it at least a little bit.
The only thing that redeemed the prequels to this point in my mind was the choreography of the light saber battles which felt like the battles of the old trilogy unleashed to their potential. Lucas has even managed to evolve this positive in a huge negative. Now with Ep. 3, instead of precise, deliberate yet incredibly quick movement designed to deftly engage an opponent we have basically the old trilogy's lightsaber battles at the speed of pressing fast-forward. No one even fights in this movie they just swing their lightsabers wildly as fast as they can perhaps hoping to induce a seizure upon their opponent (I know I felt this way as an audience member). And, sad to say, this applies especially to the final, "climactic" battle between Obi-Wan and Anakin.
The pacing is also bad. You have somewhat interesting action at the beginning where Anakin kills Count Dooku like it's no big deal with no subtlety whatsoever on the part of Lucas. When this event occurs it is the equivalent of stopping the movie and displaying the message "Now officially changing to the dark side" on screen. To be honest the entire middle part of the movie (I'm guessing roughly an hour and a half) isn't worth summarizing because frankly nothing happens. If anything is to be mentioned it would be that the Jedi know something is up with Palpatine but do nothing about it and also willingly let Anakin hang around him knowing he is a huge threat and that Anakin is a bit unstable. They could've done something but instead they say "well let's just let it go because we read some legend that said he's a good guy so let's just go with that." The dramatic transformation and progression of Anakin from light to dark that could've been cleverly paced over three new films is horrible. After his hand in Mace Windu's death(which,like everything else seems forced) all of a sudden he's a Sith. As a viewer there is no mounting tension just "....oh I guess he's a bad guy now."
Probably the most offensive part of the movie was how they sugarcoated Anakin's reasoning for turning to the dark side. Throughout the old trilogy you assume that the dark side is the shorter but more haphazard way of learning the force and that it will turn you into an agent of evil and that the light side takes more commitment but is more fulfilling. This is a universal theme that everyone on the planet can relate to and before this movie it was tragic to think that Anakin, who had so much potential for greatness, could not resist the Dark Side. It turns out even this theme that is threaded throughout the entire trilogy is not sacred to Lucas. Instead of just sticking with it he develops a storyline where Anakin dreams of Padme dying and, well it's a dream so it must be true right?? Then Palpatine tells Anakin some totally irrelevant legend about a Sith lord who could propagate longer life and prevent dying. Based on a random nightmare or two and an old wives tale told by Palpatine Anakin is ready to sell his soul to learn this power. It would be like someone telling you the lost city of Atlantis was in Lake Erie so you dropped everything to find it. Give some of the film's responsibilities to the experts or, God forbid, ask for constructive criticism! I cannot believe that people like Rick McCallum viewed the final cut of this movie and felt confident about it. They couldn't feel that way. They've spent decades of blood, sweat, and tears to end their efforts with a jilted, emotionless mess like RotS and nothing is said? The only thing I can imagine is that with Lucas at the helm no one dare criticize him or he is too set in his vision. At any rate, this was one of those rare movies where I could've made a critical comment after EVERY scene about at least one thing. That may sound arrogant but keep in mind I love Star Wars more than any other piece of media in history so it's not like I wanted anything but to love this movie. That statement alone should make you start thinking about all the "positive" reviews this movie is getting.