The hype is strong with this one...

Rating: 1/10 (28 October 2006)

(r#94)
Reading the opinions of IMDb's users always brings a smile to my face. "Lucas redeemed!" "A masterpiece!" "The best of the saga!" Excuse me? I hate to rain on your parade, but those are an awful lot of meds you're not taking.
This movie's score is ultimate proof that in a Star Wars fan's world, such petty details as acting, plot, dialogue, or, god forbid, continuity, are completely irrelevant as long as stuff blows up and more lightsabers are thrown around than in your average prison's shower room. George Lucas proves once again that action (figures) rule acting and has realized how much more comfortable it is to shoot the entire flick in a studio of green screens, rather than on any actual location. Unfortunately for him the final product is stale and lifeless; when everything save for some actors is clearly designed in a computer, how can we believe anything that happens to be real? When the actors are reading off of cue cards, how can we believe they're characters rather than plot devices bobbing across whatever CGI landscape some geek has rendered for days and weeks?
Don't even get me started on the dialogue... this stuff makes Batman and Robin look like Eternal Sunshine. Hayden Christensen's performance makes Daniel Radcliffe, that block of wood, look like Marlon Brando.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" shouts Vader, in the most gripping and moving scene since John Hurt declared his humanity in The Elephant Man (or not), thereby accurately summarizing how I felt when I realized that I'd spent my hard-borrowed money to feed George Lucas' ever growing wallet once again. Avoid, avoid, avoid! Really awful this franchise has become! Rent "Gigli" instead and realize that maybe the "Gobble gobble" line wasn't that bad after all. Not even Samuel L. Jackson could save this tumbling, tumbling dick-weed of a film!