If you like this movie, I hate you

Rating: 1/10 (9 January 2007)

wow this was the biggest waste of my time ever I don't even know why I paid $9 to go see it in the movies I guess when you see the others you just have to, oh wait now I remember, I was 6 when I saw the others. where to begin...
1.Senator Palpatine seduces Anakin to the dark side in about as much time as it takes for you to finish reading this sentence. Nevermind the fact that Anakin knows Palpatine is a Sith lord before accepting his offer, or that Sith lords are known for doing things like, oh.. I don't know, KILLING MILLIONS OF PEOPLE. Anakin is on a mission to save his wife, Padme, from certain death! Or at least likely death. Okay, it was a dream. But it seemed pretty real during the flashback sequence, so Anakin has no reason not to believe this dream will come true, as is the tendency of dreams.
2.I didn't think it was possible but the robots in this movie were more annoying than Jar Jar, yes I said it, but what evil genius Sith lord builds robots to feel pain? you'll notice that every time one of the famed Jedi, that can do pretty much *beep*ing anything (whats the need for an army when a Jedi is one) they say "ow". Before I go on, I have to address something that all you stupid Star Wars nerds are probably thinking right about now: "But it's a movie made for kids, what do you expect?!" Even Lucas stated in an interview with the BBC that:
"the movies are for kids, but the fans don't want to believe that"
Oh really? It just so happens that this "children's movie" has a scene where a guy gets his hands chopped off, a graphic decapitation, the wanton slaughter of children, and Anakin getting his legs chopped off as his stumps catch fire while his face melts. By the way, if you haven't seen this movie yet, don't read the previous sentence
3.If Yoda's so powerful and can detect peoples emotions, how come he can't detect a conspiracy involving 200,000 storm troopers AND THE WHOLE *BEEP*ing REPUBLIC?
4. the Darth Vader NOOOOOOOOO scene. after watching it I remember thinking, What the *beep* is this? he just almost killed his wife by choking her? what the *beep* did he think was going to happen?
5.Padme just dieing. no disease no wounds, just dieing. OK if people could just will themselves to die, how come people jump off bridges and shoot themselves?
6."General Grievous" a bad guy so sinister, his very name stands for PAIN AND SUFFERING. Nice job. Tired of thinking up awesome names like "Lord Dooku" and "Nute Gunray" for your bad guys? Why not just call all your characters "Evil" and "Bad" next time? All Grievous needed was a monocle, and a large black mustache that he could twirl as he cackled "I'll get you, if it's the last thing I do!"