The Good, Bad, and Downright Ugly

Rating: 1/10 (16 May 2002)

In short, it was better than the Star Wars I -- which unfortunately tells you little. It does provide entertainment value but you'll sit there with a look of incredulity on your face at least several times during the movie, including parts which you'll laugh hysterically when you shouldn't. But read on and don't worry, I won't blow the movie for you like the trailer.
The Good: The graphics were top notch as usual. Some of the effects were so good you didn't even think about how good they were as they were very convincing. If you follow the Star Wars story, you'll enjoy meeting a few of the players and seeing how the story progresses. The Obi-Wan and Anneken characters did a decent job acting. Unfortunately, that's it. I wasn't that impressed with some of the fighting scenes but others were just amazed by it. Thought the sabre work was better in Star Wars I, which should say something too.
The Bad: The story has several holes in it, as does the ability to use the force. One minute, the Jedi are all powerful. The next, you wonder why they are totally mortal -- perhaps it is to lend a feeling like there is a dangerous situation for our protagonist? The movie editing is not good and there are so many cut scenes you'll get a little dizzy and, in some cases, a scene will be too short so you'll be confused and have to consciously guess that "significant time has passed since the scene you saw 92 seconds ago." The beginning of the movie is incredibly confusing as it throws a whole bunch of characters together whom you don't know and it assumes that you remember all the players in the first movie. Fortunately, the dizzying number of characters lessens over the course of the movie. Surprise... you will see a cameo appearance by a well known actor and you will laugh when you see him (and how out of place he is!) The best part about Luke Skywalker's and Han Solo's characters was that nobody knew who they were and it didn't stick out in your mind. Some jokes are forced into this movie and you will feel like they were sometimes funny but too often placed there because Lucas felt like he needed laughs. Other times, these little "jokes" just fall very flat. Jar-Jar is back for no reason and in ludicrous positions... and fortunately he/she isn't around for very long. Warning: bring earplugs if you have them because Lucas obviously felt that he needed as many roaring engines as possible. It's VERY annoying.
The Ugly: Oh, the script in many places was, to put it kindly, MS3K laughably bad. In fact, several times during the movie, especially with the absolutely horrifically hysterical love scenes, the dialogue is so awful that you sit there in amazement and wonder how this sappy, awkward, forced garbage could ever have made it to the screen and whether Lucas was so full of his own work that he couldn't see just how absurd it is. Some of the editing is choppy. Natalie Portman is a good actress (good body too ;) ) but her lines are so awful... well, you know. Also, you'll see characters thrown at a hundred miles an hour only to walk away and brush themselves off. It's horribly funny. Princess Amadallah will annoy the hell out of you with her wardrobe that changes in virtually every scene. I thought that some of the battle scenes, especially one at the end was funny to watch. It wasn't bad, but it was very much like a comic book character.
Summation: This movie is a B-movie with superb special effects and a story line that people want to know more about. There is entertainment value but the script is so poor in several places that you might find yourself looking at your watch during this semi-predictable film and thinking that the Star Wars movies have unfortunately deteriorated into little more than cheap sci-fi tripe with CGI. I give it a 5. It's clearly below any other Star Wars movie except the first -- but it's not better by much. You will be disappointed if you are looking for a "great" movie.