Painful Experience For A Star Wars Fan

Rating: 1/10 (25 August 2003)

I am a Star Wars fanatic. I have the toys; I've read and re-read all the books. I worship at the altars of Han Solo and Boba Fett. It hurts me so much that this film Attack of The Clones was released. I feel like George Lucas took a bowie knife and gutted me. Don't get me wrong the overly long abomination has some merit to it upon the first watching. However subsequent viewings yield such a taste of dissatisfaction that the movie actually makes the rest of the series appear lesser. To retain my sanity I now have to pretend that the new movies are an unrelated series by a different man.
We'll start with the good stuff:
1.	Very interesting and cool action. 2.	Interesting storyline. 3.	Insight into the birth of the empire. 4.	Insight into the birth of Lord Darth Vader. 5.	Natalie Portman is quite attractive.
Well that's it. Those are the redeeming qualities. The dialog is horrible. The romance scenes? Needless to say that there are more realistically acted romance scenes in the seediest most amateur pornographic film! There are also more conservative fashions! Having read the script I can say that while the dialog is bad, it's not as bad as it actually is in the movie. Why is this? Because George Lucas cannot direct. I can't even talk about how little respect I have for this once revered man now.

This movie is an abomination against all that is good in this world. George Lucas is the face of evil. Please do not see it, do not rent it, do not buy action figures. Please do not in ANY way contribute anymore money to this madman. What he has done is the equivalent of Rembrandt making stick figure paintings to conclude unfinished statements in his earlier art.
I recommend this movie to no one.
I recommend it be boycotted on every level. The fact that Lucas is making the third makes me want to weep more.