Not impressed at all.

Rating: Null/10 (16 May 2002)

Well... I had some friends waiting in line for this morning's 12:01am showing of Episode II. There were still tickets available at 6pm last night so I figured, "Aw, why not?" I should've gone home and gotten some sleep, instead.
Let me say this right away. Attack of the Clones IS better than Phantom Menace. As you know, though, that ain't sayin' much. While Phantom Menace was ALL over the place as far as plot went, this is pretty straightforward. Unfortunately, that also makes it pretty boring. Over and over, we're told what's about to happen before it happens, so there is no amount of surprise for the viewer. The only example of dramatic tension I can cite is when Obi-Wan first arrives on the planet of cloners, and there's a case of mistaken identity. That's soon eliminated, though, when he confronts Jango Fett.
What also contributes to this monotony is the dialogue and the acting. Where Phantom Menace managed to be loud, annoying, and nonsensical, the dialogue in Clones is so low key and stiff it's like everyone's reading from cue cards. Everything you may have read about the terrible writing and the completely wooden performances is true. Yoda is far more animated than most of the humans. The "romance" consists of cliche after cliche and is completely laughable (to drive home a point, everyone in the theater WAS laughing through just about all of the Anakin/Padme dialogue). And those C-3PO lines during the arena sequence? Whoever wrote those should be tarred and feathered (you'll know what I mean if you see it).
Maybe the most disheartening thing about Clones is that a LOT of sequences seem to be stolen from other sources that George has been absorbing over the last 20 years. The speeder chase through Coruscant feels like it's right out of The Fifth Element. When the speeders hit the ground and the chase resumes on foot, it turns into a moment out of Blade Runner. Padme has a total Sound of Music moment on a verdant hillside. The arena sequence shares several shots with Gladiator. There are numerous "virtual handheld" shaky, fast zooms during the clone battle which appear to be straight out of a Japanese sci-fi film. There's also a sequence with Anakin and Padme in a droid factory that looks more like a level in a platform-style videogame than anything else.
So, is there anything redeeming about the movie? Well... Obi-Wan's Jedi starfighter is pretty cool, although we don't see any use of the "force amplifier" that it's supposed to have (which is a big part of the PS2 game based on the film, I'm to understand). We see Jango Fett use just about all the gadgets on his armor (much more than we ever saw from Boba). Anankin is such a whiny jerk throughout the movie, it's kind of vindicating to see Count Dooku smack him around at the end. Kudos to Christopher Lee for being the only actor actually making an effort to sell his performance. Thank you, Darth SummerIsle! And, of course, Yoda (A.K.A. The Spinning Green Ball of Death) kicks quite a bit of ass.
All in all, I'd say take in a matinee if you're curious. It's DEFINITELY not worth the price of full admission. Better still, just go back and watch the original trilogy.