Oh Dear

Rating: 8/10 (15 January 2004)

Two films in and its now too late for Lucas's "prequel' trilogy to be regarded as anything other than the greatest act of creative suicide in the modern cinema. No matter how good Episode 3 may be (and lets not kid ourselves, it stars Hayden Christiansen - is that his name?), there can be no doubt that these bloated, portentious, self-agrandising CGI cartoons have de-constructed the Lucas myth beyond redemption.
The awful acting we expect, but Portman and Thingy make Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher look like Laurence Oliver and Vivian Leigh! If I live to be 101 I hope their mind-numbingly awful "courtship" scenes never cross my glance again. There are words to accurately describe it that the rules of posting here do not allow.
Like a lot of Star Wars fans old enough to remember the originals on the big screen, I tend to go back and see these films again. These are supposed to be the ultimate fantasy epics, the cheerleaders for modern escapism. This time, I went back to see if it really was as wooden and un-engaging as I'd first thought. George, you really have lost the plot. Lovely to look at yet empty at the core. We don't care about your worlds anymore, Peter Jackson has shown us the new way. Oh, and you owe me 12 quid.