A year later, and I'm still writhing

Rating: Null/10 (31 January 2004)

Happening upon this film, I'm nothing short of embarrassed by the fact it's been rated over a 7 (or a 4 for that matter) by IMDB readers. I distinctly remember seeing the film in the theaters, excited about a new Star Wars movie, absolutely sure there was no way it could be worse than Episode One.
I was wrong.
The plot crawls, often times making Blade Runner seem fast paced (at least that film had substance). The cinematography was no better than that of your average film student. The special effects were nice, but hardly groundbreaking. And the acting... oh the acting... Every time Portman and Christensen were on screen together I wanted to start screaming. I've seen better acting and stronger chemistry in high school plays. Even Samuel L. Jackson seemed wooden and half-alive.
This movie proves two things. George Lucas is a terrible director (he's directed two watchable films in his life in the original Star Wars and American Graffiti - THX1138 is a great example of what NOT to do) and he CAN NOT write dialogue. His stories are great. His execution is horrible.
If your reading this it's probably not because you're trying to decide whether or not to see this - and you're either agreeing with me (good for you!) or you hate me. If that's the case, so be it. Please though - for the good of American culture - ask yourself objectively if you'd like this movie if it weren't a "Star Wars" film?