When you have a screenplay by George Lucus, you know you're in trouble.

Rating: Null/10 (6 June 2004)

When I was a kid, I grew up with George Lucus' classic Star Wars trilogy. To me, they are the grandfathers of all sci-fi films. Some scenes, dialogue, and characters are so groundbreaking and unique, they'll stay through your life forever. And now, as a young woman, I look at George's prequel trilogy and quote a solemn line from a wise king in one of my favorite films: "How did it come to this?"
Star Wars: Episode II follows our heroes throughout the galaxy 10 years after the death of Qui-Gon Gin in Episode I. Former Queen of Naboo Padme Amidala (Natalie Portman) is being tracked by assassins. They hunt her down because of some separatist movement in the Republic. While under the very watchful eyes of her old friend Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christenson), Padme hides from her assassins and soon falls in love with Anakin. Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGreggor) is on the hunt for a notorious bounty hunter and discovers a secret clone army for the Republic. However, the face behind the dangerous separatist movement is still concealed. The Jedi are on a race against time before this mysterious aggressor unleashes his attack.
Despite this long plot line that I have just given you, the storyline is incredibly thin. There will be moments in the film with nonsense dialogue and totally unnecessary scenes. And where there are needed scenes, the atmosphere is totally ruined by some of the most abysmal dialogue ever recorded. Hayden Christenson is the center of attention in this issue. His most painful offering is the scene where he confesses his love to Padme. This is how he casts his magic: "I'm haunted by the kiss that you should never have given me. My heart is beating... hoping that kiss will not become a scar. You are in my very soul, tormenting me..." Jeez. First Canada gives the world Celine Dion, Avril Lavigne, and now the worst actor of all time? It was better when we were known for beer and beavers.
I'm keeping my hopes up for Episode III but after this, there's little hope of total redemption.
Grade: C