This sorry mess of a movie

Rating: Null/10 (20 May 2002)

From the unconvincing assassination scene at the beginning, to the attempt to emulate TESB at the end, this dull, unexciting movie had most of the audience in The Ritzy, Brixton, London, in fits of laughter at each fresh, clunky plot turn, or tired, dated old cliche (Anakin has a bad dream...). Although the FX are 2nd to none, and the fights, space battle and general pyrotechnics are superb, what this sorry mess of a movie lacks is a heart, a centre, someone about whom we can care. Cos God love him, not only has the Anakin character become a crashing bore, but Hayden Christiansen just cannot act. Not at all. Not one little bit. And he's more or less swallowed up by all the crash bang whizzery that surrounds him and his cohorts; Ewan Mc Gregor's Obi Wan is more dull and humourless than ever, Natalie Portman struggles gamefully with the terrible dialogue but in the end does all her emoting through her hair, and the various others involved (Samuel L and Christopher Lee especially) simply fax their performances in. One the minus side, bad dialogue, bad acting, no narrative, on the plus, top FX and a great sabre fight from Yoda. Which earns it 4 out of 10. And that's being generous...