Better? Not Quite, But Still Enjoyable.

Rating: 7/10 (18 March 2007)

Episode II is rated by other critics as superior to Episode I, but frankly I feel it is rather over-rated, as this is not quite the masterpiece for which I had hoped, upon reading those reviews. They've touted it as, "...a return to the old formula..." for which the Star Wars Money Machine is known. That seems rather ignorant to me, as this is the second prequel installment, so of course more familiar elements will be demonstrated here than were in the first, as there will be even more in Episode III. That is a given. For them to proclaim that this is somehow superior to the Introduction that was Episode I because of those more familiar elements, is just asinine. Episode I, as an introduction, was perfectly presented. This work, however, was more focused on Luca$'s obsession with teen love and an homagic tribute to his "America Graffiti," than any attempt at the actual meat of the Star Wars Saga.
While there was lots of action and some brilliant effects, this chapter of the Star Wars saga ran more like your typical teenage angst-filled romance, than what I would expect from the Luca$ Star Wars money machine.
Episode II is a literal sea of cameos by other well-known to fairly-known actors. Everyone wanted in on these movies - Check out Marton Csokas as Geonosian Archduke Poggle the Lesser (uncredited). You may remember him from Lord of the Rings trilogy as Celeborn !! .
As most of you now know, the star is Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker. Now, I've nothing against the lad, but Hayden Christensen?! The Star Wars money machine is a far cry from playing the Paper Boy in John Carpenter's "In the Mouth of Madness," and it shows. He plays the part unprofessionally. I was not impressed with this young man's talents in the least. His portrayal is stiff, as though he's been taped to a long pole which has been run up his back. He delivers his dialog as though he were reading cue cards while merely parroting the words.
Anakin is full of the usual teenage angst; rebellion, outbursts of pious whining, given to fits of sulky anger and more whining. But his execution of this performance never quite rings the bell. He appears angry, but doesn't quite demonstrate it. He appears full of pain, but is not quite convincing. The story helps to convince, but Christensen falls short each and every time. Scene by scene, his actions are designed to demonstrate his leaning towards the dark side, but he's too normal a teen aged boy for this tool to be the least bit effective. He does not demonstrate the appropriate darkness necessary for him to pull it off the role of a would-be Vader. His unimpressive performance makes it completely unbelievable that he will ever BE Darth Vader. He's too..."average." Some critics have declared that his murder of the entire village of sand people who captured and subsequently killed his mother, to be a sure indication that he is headed down the wrong path, but I daresay that were that any of OUR mothers, we might have behaved in much the same way without ever being classified at the level of evil one expects from he who will be Darth Vader. I guess this is just another one of those"wait and see" judgments I will have to make after the release of Episode III.
Don't get me wrong; you get a great movie. This work is filled with exhilarating battles, good story development (as long as you don't think about it), great visual effects, and otherwise stellar performances. It's just replete with plot holes, Christensen stinking up the screen, and devotes more time to Padmé and Anakin than it does the saga, itself.
Featured within are several great battles, including a rousing battle between Yoda and Dooku. It was rather endearing watching Yoda jump around in that battle like a little spider monkey on crack. It looked impossible that he didn't cut himself clean in half. I kept expecting to see his two, separate pieces fall individually; green blood spraying the Count.
The story which takes a back seat, but is evident, surrounds the Clone Wars. A long-deceased Jedi Master has ordered an enormous clone army to be constructed on behalf of the Republic. The "cloners" have secured the DNA of the very capable bounty hunter Jango Fett and have used his DNA to build the army. You later get to see Yoda take command of this army, though in a small way, to rescue the captured Jedi Knights and Masters from the clutches of evil.
There is also a large sweeping epic story line which is somehow lost in what becomes nothing more than a trumped-up teen love story. For some reason, Luca$ seems unable to stay on the main plot, and keeps going back to Padmé and Anakin. We all know they both violated their vows and positions. We all know they are Luke and Leia's biological parents. We didn't need for half the screen time to go to their angst-filled teenage love story. This single factor, excluding all the questions and plot holes and/or continuity problems, weighed this movie down so far from The Phantom Menace, that I can scarcely work up any enthusiasm for Episode III. What enthusiasm I do have is surrounding the possibility of Luca$ actually filling in some of these gaping holes, seeing Wookies in battle, and uplifting the prequel trilogy back up to the level where we, as Star Wars fans, need it to be.
I suppose something like a 7/10 is fair, but that will change after we see how well it introduces and sets up the story contained in Episode III, just as Episode III's rating will be determined with how well it was allowed to tie into Episode IV, so hopes are not high.
the Fiend :.