Episode 1 *was* better.

Rating: 3/10 (2 June 2002)

Remember when total creative control was a good thing? Expunge that memory from your mind, because George Lucas has ruined it for everybody.
If AOTC wasn't a Star Wars movie, it wouldn't get a good review from anybody - Lucas has successfully brainwashed people into believing that Star Wars movies are good, because, hey, it's Star Wars! This movie is full of bad things - bad scripting, bad acting, bad story, bad characterization, bad pacing. The CGI is the best thing in the whole show, and that's not a thing to base a movie on.
Remember young Anakin (Jake Lloyd) and how 'Yippee! made everyone want to stick forks in their ears? Hayden Christiansen as teenage Anakin made me want to stick forks in every part of his body. His performance is so far from believable that it's laughable, except that the movie is too serious to be funny.
Granted, a poor performance by an actor doesn't necessarily sink a movie. Unfortunately, nothing else in AOTC saves it. There's enough wooden acting here to build entire towns out of. The scenes between Anakin and Padme actually forced me to stop watching the movie while they were on - I don't remember when I was last that embarrassed for somebody else.
Jar-jar Binks was a focus for hatred in TPM - yes, he was overdone, yes, he was annoying, yes, we all wanted to see him die a gruesome and amusing death. But when I saw AOTC I was happy to see him in the scenes because then I knew I wouldn't be sitting through yet another Anakin-Padme goo-goo eyes slopfest.
Story-wise, AOTC has all the appeal of watching the Ken Starr investigation, without the sex. Does anybody really care about trade wars? Lucas has written us a saga about embargoes and unfair trade practices - well, whoop-de-doo, call the whole thing Star Economics 101 and stop fooling yourself, George.
It had some nice action scenes - but considering what I had to sit through to get there, I'd have been happier renting the DVD a year from now and fast-forwarding to get to them.