Wonderful to look at but spoilt by awful dialogue and a dull romance.

Rating: 6/10 (20 June 2002)

The original Star Wars trilogy has become the stuff of modern myth, like
James Bond, or The Lord of the Rings. People obsess about it, there are
masses of merchandising spinoffs and loath it or love it, Luke, Darth and company are a part of pop culture. There were hints that the series was losing its lustre in 'Return of the Jedi', but even so the shallow and often irritating 'Phantom Menace' came as a big disappointment to most older viewers. So here we are again, another highly-anticipated installment, another guaranteed blockbuster. Is it any better than its predecessor?
Well, yes. It's good. But it could have been a lot better.

There's a lot to like here: the visual imagination on display is as
breathtaking as ever, for example in the design of Camino, the rain-drenched world of graceful but vaguely sinister clone-making aliens, or in the beasts of the arena on Geonosis. The energy and scale of the action scenes are also impressive, with nearly-seamless CGI effects. A shame there isn't the same flair in the writing. He may think up a decent plot - and I do like how he portrays a democracy turning into a dictatorship - but when it comes to dialogue George Lucas is simply bad.
The script in the first half-hour is awful, full of lines that feel like
they've been cut from a cardboard box. While it does get better - there's a good scene in a bar early on - every now and then we get another clanging line. The romance between Padme and Anakin suffers most from corniness. Natalie Portman and Hayden Christiansen look the part: she's gorgious, he's handsome, with a darkness under his eyes that suggests anger and arrogance. But otherwise their affair has the originality and charm of a bad Mills and Boon. They tumble in the long grass, they angst in front of a log fire, they say things like 'I am haunted by the memory of that kiss that should not have happened. Do not let that kiss become a scar.' I actually groaned aloud several times.
In the original films the actors generally rose above scripts that weren't all that much better than this one, delivering lines with panache and creating memorable characters. But here, Christopher Lee aside, they can't. Perhaps it's because they were acting in front of blue screens most of the time, but when actors as good as Ewan McGregor and Samuel L. Jackson seem flat, you have to point the blame at the director for not making them feel at ease, or giving them more to work with. Lucas says he doesn't listen to critics and does things his way. He needs to face facts, step back into the background and provide concepts and an overall vision, leaving the writing and direction to people with more talent. You can almost imagine him in his
multi-million dollar ranch, being seduced by his own Dark Side. 'Come with me George, include Jar-Jar Binks again. The kiddies all loved him. Together we will rule the box office. Oh, and let's call it 'Attack of the Clones'. That's a cool title.' Like the Force, nearly every good thing about this movie is matched by a bad one: some lively CGI characters, some wooden actors. Christopher Lee and his mesmerising voice, Jar-Jar and his teeth-grindingly irritating one. The stunning images, the banal script. Just when you think the movie is beginning to soar, along comes a cliche (the assassin killed just before she can name her employer, the woman who dies with a last gasp 'I love you') that jars your suspension of disbelief. It picks up steam in the last hour but there is only one great scene: when Yoda puts aside his stick and picks up his light-saber. For New Zealanders the other highlight will be seeing Temuera Morrison and some other Polynesian faces on screen. Tem is solid as bounty hunter Jango Fett, and he gets some cool action scenes, but he's seems a bit too heroic and likeable for the role and like the rest of the actors he has to mouth some pretty rank lines.
What is hilarious is hearing the clone soldiers and little Boba Fett speak with Maori accents. Too much bro, too much.
For all its flaws 'Attack of the Clones' is enjoyable, if you're a Star Wars fan like me. But if you need to see something that makes you feel more than awed, excited and occassionally amused, something with original ideas and characters with depth, don't bother turning up.
6 1/2 /10