Christopher Lee rules!

Rating: Null/10 (4 June 2002)

"SWE2" crams a lot into its ample running time: great spectacle, dazzling action, sometimes confusing politics, several starchy characters, and often stilted dialogue (young lovers DO NOT use the word "cannot" in conversation!). Unfortunately, the Boy Who Couldn't Act in "SWE1" (Boy Vader was by far the weakest link, much more so than you-sa know who) has grown up to be the Young Man Who Still Can't Act. At this rate, we may run full circle, to the 1977 original, before we get to a guy (2 guys, actually: Dave Prowse's walk and James Earl Jones' voice) who can play Anakin/Vader effectively.
Though Hayden Christensen isn't equal to the task, it's interesting to see the path by which Anakin is being tempted to the "dark side." It's not like he's tempted to rob a convenience store or become a bodyguard to a drug lord. Who doesn't face the adolescent urge to resist the guidance of fathers or father figures (in this case, Obi-Wan)? Who doesn't enjoy the flattery and praise of men of influence (Palpatine)? Who wouldn't want to avenge the harm suffered by his own mother? Most of all, who wouldn't find his steely resolve weakened by the dishy likes of Natalie Portman's Amidala?
And poor chump, what an assignment: "Guard this girl, on whom you already have a tremendous crush, with your life. Spend time with her at a beautiful lakeside villa surrounded by lush landscapes and glowing sunsets. Picnic in the tall flowers with her while she runs around wearing flowing Renaissance/hippychick outfits. But don't you DARE fall in love with her." Wasn't there ANYBODY ELSE in the galaxy who could have taken this task off his hands? A gay Jedi, maybe?
What mystifies is what she sees in HIM. Amidala is gorgeous and radiates intelligence, and when the heat is on and the shooting starts, she becomes an action heroine worthy of being Princess Leia's mom. He, by contrast, remains as lively as a wooden Indian on roller skates, especially in the awkward love scenes between them. So when she finally declares herself to him, one wonders what she sees in this slab of Canadian bacon, eh? But no biggie; it's an action flick, a comic-book movie, of the sort in which scenes of emotional resonance often show a tin ear for dialogue.

"SWE2" is otherwise a slam-bam entertainment full of the chases, battles, spectacles, and perilous asteroid belts we've come to expect of the series. The comic interaction between 3PO and R2D2, such a staple since 1977, kicks off here. It's amusing to see the extent to which Ewan MacGregor is deliberately aping Alec Guiness's mannerisms. Good to see an expanded role for Samuel L. Jackson as Mace Windu, a hoot to see Yoda in combat (possible now that he's a CGI and no longer a puppet with somebody's hand up his butt), and always great to see Christopher Lee again! If his character, Count Dooku, is to return in "SWE3," they better start filming his scenes soon: Mr. Lee, the last survivor of the stable of Hammer Films' Gothic regulars, turned 80 in April '02.
The political context of the story made me raise my eyebrows. Some have tried to see a parallel with our current war on terror, but I think they're all wet. The crisis facing the Republic is that there are separatists who want to break off from the central galactic government. To counter this popular movement, the Republic's leader, Chancellor Palpatine, "reluctantly" calls for the creation of a "Grand Army of the Republic" (!). People, this isn't the language of 2002, but of 1860: for "separatists," substitute "secessionists," and you may catch my drift. Palpatine is the galactic equivalent of the wildly overrated Abe Lincoln, a bloody-handed tyrant who, under the guise of "preserving the Union," is instead about to destroy it, to replace the Union of cooperation with a Union of conquest... an Empire, in other words. The older I get, the more of a Dixieland partisan I become, so I found the cosmopolitical background eerily heartwarming. And the next galactic rebel I see better be waving the Dixie flag.