Star Wars can only go up from here

Rating: 5/10 (28 May 2002)

*This review contains minor spoilers*
When I first watched The Phantom Menace, I thought it was just okay. I had lowered my expectations before seeing it, and it seemed entertaining. I even bought the DVD over time. Unfortunately, the more I watch it, the less I like it.
True, it's mean to pick on the little guy, but Jake Lloyd is quite awful as an actor. I know that some kids do talk with a bland, flat, monotone, but this is just not acceptable for a kid that is supposedly as brilliant as Anakin. The rest of the cast does okay, but the script doesn't really demand much. The only actor that I thought fit the bill perfectly was Ewan McGregor as Obi Wan, which is impressive since Obi Wan is one of the only characters from the original trilogy.
The CGI ultimately hurts Phantom Menace. As impressive as they may have been at the time, the effects are actually quite dated now, and it shows. Although intended to give PM a fantastic, mythical look, it ultimately ends up looking cold and plastic. The land-speeder race, one of the movie's key action sequences, seemed dull, unsuspenseful, and artificial, like a video game.
Lukas resorts to alien creatures speaking English with absurd accents rather than have them speak different languages. Occasionally it's difficult to understand what the creatures are saying. Generally the accents are annoying, even offensive at times. It's like watching poorly dubbed Japanese animation.
The biggest failure of PM is its lack of lovable characters. Lucas tried too hard to make the characters "cool." Thus they are all serious, stoic. There is no wiley, smartass Han Solo. There is no hotheaded, naive Luke. There is no wild, yet loyal Chewie. Instead the characters of PM are bland and forgettable. The only colorful characterization is left to the desperate antics of Jar Jar Binks. Jar Jar is slapstick to the extreme; you can almost hear the *zing* and *awooga* of Looney Tunes every time "he-suh" slips and bumbles.
The one redeeming point in the movie is the thrilling, well-choreographed light-sabre battles. Darth Maul may have been under-utilized and under-developed but he is built up just enough for the final duel to be climatic. The final three-way sabre duel against Maul is one of the best of all six Star Wars movies. Unfortunately, even that battle has a clunky ending.
Overall I give the Phantom Menace 5 / 10. It's worth watching, but its flaws outweigh its virtues, and it's ultimately the weakest of all the Star Wars films.