No way

Rating: 1/10 (28 January 2007)

Alright. I'll be dating myself, but who cares? Anyone who grew up with the original Star Wars movies (Episodes IV through VI) will likely notice how horribly this movie was written, directed, even conceived. I hate this movie with a passion and refuse to watch Episodes II and III for that reason. If there is ever a movie I was relieved NOT to have seen in a theater at $15 a ticket, it's this one. The acting was pathetic. The casting was irritating. The characters were poorly conceived. The cinematography was distracting and the CGI went overboard. Jar Jar Binks has to be one of the most irritating characters to ever grace the Silver Screen. I don't know if I've written anything that might be considered a "spoiler" since this movie can't be spoiled any more than it already is. Use your time more constructively. Make paper airplanes with your kids or friends and see whose can fly furthest. Go to the kitchen and count toothpicks. Read a book by Anne Rice or J. K. Rowling. Pick the lint from your clothes dryer lint screen with tweezers. Anything you can do would be better than subjecting yourself to this movie. I normally would say the screenwriter should be dragged out into the street and shot, but I do still have a certain respect for George Lucas. Anyone who can get a movie company to make Episode II and III after this junk-fest is a genius. I may hate the movie, but you gotta admire someone who can crap a script like this and have it labeled "gold".