Phantom Menace: Aptly Named...

Rating: 7/10 (20 May 1999)

Before I begin, I have to say that this, in the spirit of all Star Wars movies, was a great deal of fun. I highly reccomend that everyone go see it, if for no other reason than to dethrone that worthless Titanic mess from a few years back...
Major Flaw 1: The characters were extremely flat: Nobody had a sense of humor. There was no Han Solo character to make jokes and be a good natured ass.All major characters had no emotional involvement. Impossible to care for them The kid version of Anakin Skywalker was written worst of all. Everything he said sounded like Lucas spouting off about things, didn't sound like a kid at all. Lucas needs someone else to do his scripts to give the characters more substance and to involve the audience in the struggles they face.
Major Flaw 2: Jar Jar Binks: Basically the anphibian version of Ewoks. Too damn cutesy and stupid. Definite over effort to appeal to kids.
Major Flaw 3: Continuity: All the space ships, droids, weapons, commuicatons devices, techno eqipment, and costuming was much more HiTech than the old wars flicks, which wouldn't be a problem except that it is supposedly all happening before the old movies. The design of space ships and droids was much more reminiscent of Stargate and Independance Day than they were of the old Wars.
Major Flaw 4: Nintiesizaton: The Force is actually based on particles in all exising cells that speak to you, not a spiritual entity.
Major Flaw 5: Offensive Stuff: Anakin was a virgin birth. I guess that makes darth vader Jesus. The bad guys costumes were the same as Bishops vestments, complete with Chasables and Mitres. The usual anticatholic crapola.
That said, It was still quite an enjoyable trip.