What The Phantom Menace should've been:

Rating: 2/10 (4 July 2018)

Look , i'm sure there's about a dozen other reviews you can read on the Phantom Menace , or the prequels in general , so rather than make this a nit-picky review i'm gonna make this to show how I would fix the Phantom Menace.
EPISODE I: The Guilty Knight ( 1999 )
Now i know what you're thinking , who's the guilty knight? Simple: Obi-Wan. Infact , Obi-Wan is gonna be the main character for the entire movie. More on that in a second. This movie is set in peace time , as in that 1000 generations of peace without the Sith. So we open on Kerry-fisch , the home world of young TEENAGE slave Anakin Skywalker. His home world isn't Tatooine becase why would his home world be the same as Lukes? That's dumb. So anyways Anakin is scrubbing some old ship parts when he comes across an old , abttered but still functioning Lightsaber , HE attempts to use this Lightsaber to threaten the guards , get a ship , and escape. But he is shot in the back , and then the saber is taken away. The guards begin to kick and punch him , so he puts his hands over his head to protect hismelf. Then he opens his eyes , and sees the guards floating in mid air infront of his hands. He drops them , and doesn't have much time to think as he is immediatley knocked out by a guard afterwards. Then , we cut to ALDERAAN. A small ships is approaching the planet , and on this ship are two Jedi Knights: Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon ( now the same age and like brothers ). Obi-Wan yearns for battle and to fight the Sith , while Qui-Gon is just happy that they're not risking their lives like in the dark times. They're heading to Alderaan to do a routine check up with the Queen and such. Their ship lands , and is greeted by noone. They then realise that the Mandalorians are there! And they've kidnapped the queen and princess! This is nolonger just a routine check up , this is a rescue mission. See now we've actually spent a little time getting to know the Jedi rather than just meeting them and then they wip out their Lightsabers. The two then notice the head Mandalorian having a holocron chat with a cloaked figure , a Sith! Obi-Wan points it out , but Qui-Gon dismisses it as ' just an old weirdo in a blanket '. The Jedi have some fun and breezy action ( which is purley shown to build and show the friendship between theses two characters. ) , even managing to steal back the princess. But then the Mandalorians get the upper hand , and the Jedi are chased off the planet along with the princess. The Mandalorians try to stop the Jedi from escaping , but Qui-Gon steers them clear. The trio decide to head back to Coruscant to tell the Jedi Council about the Mandalorians and the Sith. Unfortunatley , they noticed their ship is damaged , and make a quick pit stop on Kerry-fisch for parts. Here , a riot is thrown by the villagers against the Jedi. Streets are invaded , houses are burnt down , all manner of creature are mamed or die. Amidst the action , Obi-Wan and the princess see Anakin ( who's the same age as the princess ) , and they rush to prtoect him. But then they see him do that thing WE saw him do at the start , only with more people. After the riot , they confront him and his owner. They ask to take him back to Coruscant , as Obi-Wan had never seen uch a powerful force user since ..... Yoda. When his owner denie , Qui-Gon goes a little crazy and nearly kills the owner before he says yes. Obi-Wan attempst to talk to an annyoed Qui-Gon , who refrains from Obi-Wan. Meanwhile , Anakin and the princess get it on. They talk , they bond , and quickly become the best of friends. She even tells him her name: Padme Organa. After that , they head to Coruscant and meet with the Jedi Council. Yoda isn't shown here , but he is mentioned by name. The trio tell of the Mandalorians , the Sith , and Anakins sudden strong force abilities. Mace Windu agrees to let Anakin train with the other young Padawans. In private , Obi-Wan speaks with Windu about Qui-Gon. After this a whole bunch of character stuff happens with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan that i'm too lazy to write , but it ends with the two's freindship being compromised , and Obi-Wan a little confused and lost. Then , an attack is pulled on the Mandalorians keeping the Queen hostage. Also Anakin is left on Coruscant , and out of the rest of the movie. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan run into the Sith lord on Alderaan , and he beats the crap out of them with his force lightning. In the end , the sith lord says " Leave this imbesile and join me , my apprentice." , and Qui-Gon betrays joins the Sith Lord. This is then explained by Qui-Gon having some link to the Sith lord , and it's all Obi-Wan's fault. They then have a pretty long and saddish battle that's 100% Obi-Wan feeling guilty for this mistake. And in the end , Qui-Gon ( now called Darth Maul ) escape with the mysterious Sith. The Mandalorians are defeated , however , and the queen is taken back. Obi-Wan returns to Coruscant , tells the Jedi of what happened , and then mopes around feeling sorry for himself while the Jedi freak out about the Sith returning. Obi-Wan wanders around the temple , guilty and depressed. But then he sees a gleam of hope , in the corner of his eye. Anakin , playing with a practice Lighstaber. ' I can redeem myself , by training him. ' thought Obi-Wan. And that's how we end Episode I.
So yeah , there's my Phantom Menace reboot. In actuality , it's probably worse than the actual Phantom Menace , but i think it'd work.