Worst of the series

Rating: 5/10 (11 January 2009)

I remember buying my ticket to see this when it came out. As a lifelong rabid Wars fan, the blood raced through my veins to see this. Imagine that, a brand new Star Wars movie!! And I was still flying on the Euphoria on seeing the re-releases 2 years earlier! (in '77 I wasn't even around and but a small child when Empire & Jedi came out, so I had never seen them but on the small screen til the re-release.)
You can imagine how far on the floor my jaw dropped at the sheer badness that was Episode 1. There are so many things wrong with this movie I don't even have the space to write it all down, and am not even sure where to start.
1. Jar Jar Binks. Do I need to even say why? Easily the bamboo shoot under the finger nail of all movie characters ever.
2. The force is microscopic blood organisms. Are you freakin' kidding me?! I grew up with the movies, and the wisdom & mysticism presented in them, not to learn it's on the same level as a cold! Thanks for trainwrecking one of the most beloved concepts in all of sci fi.
3. Jake Lloyd/Anakin Skywalker. Miscast actor (more of a blonde, California surf kid, then the dark future Darth Vadar.) His immaculate conception?! What you mean like Jesus? He built C3PO?! (Welcome to plot convenience playhouse everyone!!) I can accept that he's smart, and has an uncanny ability to fix things. In face, it's easier for me to say that there's NOTHING about him that is appealing than to list all the faults.
To the reviewers who said that this part would've been better played by Haley Joel Osment, I whole heartedly agree, Osment possesses a great brooding dark quality and is a much better actor.
4. It's Booooooring!! A bunch of political dribble, dull trade disputes, pod races that go on for what seems like years. "Wattoo" talks too much I likened him more to a paroled hustler than some scuzzy repair shop guy. Really dumb & unnecessary underwater city and it's occupants. Ray Park is completely wasted and underutilized, waste of Neeson & Portman's talents. Only Ewan McGregor manages to pull off a decent performance given the undoubtedly crappy script and worse direction.
It would seem George Lucas was so involved with making his movie look "bright & shiny" with as many special effects as he could cram in, that he forgot about a decent story, good script and creating characters that we could care about. Nothing about any of these people made me want to care about them, their lives, their quests, the descent into Vadar.....nothing! (Except McGregor, who did a great job with what he had.) I was so vastly disappointed with this film that it put me off seeing Episode 2 (which was a significant improvement) for months.
Being the Wars fan I am, i'm giving this the halfway rating of 5/10 (being VERY generous, and mostly for McGreogor's & Park's performances.) George Lucas owes John Williams an apology. The score is probably the best part of the movie, but for making a man of William's talent waste time on it, Lucas, you should be ashamed of yourself!