The Force Is Not Strong In this One

Rating: 4/10 (19 August 1999)

Star Wars - The Phantom Menace
Things to like about the original Star Wars trilogy:
1. Simple yet imaginative plot. 2. Interesting and engaging characters. 3. Great special effects.
Things to like about The Phantom Menace:
1. Great special effects.
I mean, COME ON!! The original movies were pretty stupid, I have to admit, but they were fun-stupid. The new film is just DULL.
And the plot is a big problem. For a start we have a "Trade Federation". This is not nearly as scary as an "Evil Empire", I'm sorry but it just isn't. "Yikes! Here come the delegates from the Evil Trade Federation!!!" See?!? It just doesn't work. It's like "Beware the dreaded Agriculture Commission!!" or something.
The plot is supposed to be for kids, but unfortunately it seems to have quite a high "Daddy? Who are they/What's going on?" quotient. Certainly the kids in the audience with me had no idea. Especially as to who Queen Amidala actually was (towards the end it was a bit like that scene from "Spartacus" - "I'm Queen Amidala", "No I'M Queen Amidala!!" etc etc...)
Then we have the characters. Or rather we don't because NO-ONE in this film HAS any character.
I think the problem is that George Lucas thinks that when people become Learned and Wise they also become members of the Incredibly Boring Society. Kind of like Luke Skywalker in "Return of the Jedi". When Luke became a Jedi knight he suddenly became "Enigmatic" for which we can read "Dull and Awful". I thought this was merely down to bad acting on Mark Hamill's part in Jedi, but no - because Liam and Ewan are JUST as "Enigmatic" in this new film. At certain parts in the movie I thought I spotted Ewan's natural exuberance bubbling over, but at those points George obviously yelled "Cut!!!" and poked Ewan with his directorial cattle prod. The end result is that both actors look like they have had their charisma surgically removed.
Then there's Queen Amidala. She is a very different kind of royalty to Princess Leia who was kind of spunky. Amidala is "Regal". Unfortunately George ALSO equates "Regal" with "Dull and Awful". Also she seems to have gone to the same finishing school as Queen Elizabeth and as such delivers all her lines with the same passion.
Then we have the kid. Having small children in films is always a dangerous move. It's not their fault, they are just by nature irritating creatures who can't act (with the exception of Bart Simpson). Eventually CGI will have improved to the state where all children will be played by far more charismatic special effects, but for the moment George was lumbered with an Annakin Skywalker with the emotional range of a turnip. See the scene where he was separated from his mother? Now if he had been a NORMAL child, he would have done that whole chest-heaving-snot-coming-out-of-the-nose-bawling thing. But he doesn't. He didn't even look close to being dischuffed, the scene was completely bungled. Yes, yes, I know he's not a normal child - he's got a high medichlorien count or something (I think it's a bit like cholesterol) and he's causing a "divergence in the force" - but all the same, it's hard to care for young Anni.
On to Jar-Jar. A lot of people hate this character, and I was surprised I didn't really. It's not that he isn't annoying, just that he isn't unbearable either. I mean, C3PO was a lot worse. (I have my own theories as to what the "PO" in his name stands for). Jar-jar is there for the kiddies, and as such probably does quite a good job.
Is there any point spending much time on Darth Maul? I don't think so. George Lucas didn't.
The main problem with this movie is that if the characters are not interesting, we don't really care about them. If we don't care about them, we don't really care when they are in danger. If we don't care when they are in danger there is no sense of relief when things work out. There is no emotional wallop in this movie like there was in "Jedi" or "Star Wars" when the Death Stars blew up. The only emotional release I felt was when the credits rolled and I knew FINALLY that the thing was over.
p.s. Did I mention the special effects? They're ever so impressive.