An Eight-Foot Ballerina with Cool Tights

Rating: 5/10 (10 July 2017)

There's a scene when Peter Parker uses one of his main gadgets as a voice box. Although it's intended to be funny through satire, SPIDER-MAN suddenly having a deep, formidable, robotic tone actually fits the costume, which is arguably the coolest, meanest and leanest superhero get-up of all time...
Not that Tom Holland is a weak SPIDER-MAN. He's a good one. And a good actor. Sympathetic. Energetic. And while it's difficult if impossible making any high school student seem like a geek nowadays when everyone carries a personal computer/phone in their pocket, he fits the mold of an underdog who's hiding a secret while getting no credit for his accomplishments...
Which are intentionally rare in HOMECOMING. Having surpassed the field trip spider-bite origin story (it's been done twice already), there is a beginning since Peter Parker's not quite ready to be a hero of the Avenger (or any) magnitude. That aspect overrides a practically nonexistent plot having to do with former DC Protagonist turned Marvel villain Michael Keaton as The Vulture, based on the long-ago comic book and cartoon character, who should have been deemed The Junkman given his own particular origin that opens the show...
As a blue collar scrap collector... once the government moves in to clean up the mess from each Avenger battle, he makes the best of what he's already gathered-up, and has a lot of cool stuff that's being sold illegally; and after eight years of mysterious (and unrealistic) anonymity, Peter Parker's on his trail...
Which is more of a beeline, and only partially interesting given the lack of urgency to carry the story forward. Made up for by an incredible 11th (or maybe 10th) hour twist that ignites two rivals against each other in a great way, and the real action begins albeit quickly heading towards an inevitable conclusion...
If only that turning point occurred halfway through instead, Peter's large, nerdy sidekick wouldn't need so many forced one-liners (dude, we get it, you're endearingly flawed), and this HOMECOMING would be more of a high-stakes 15- Round Matchup instead of the Exhibition Bout that it is — which isn't too shabby: After all, a fight is a fight in the Marvel universe, and always fun and cool to watch/experience. But since in any superhero installment (or even a James Bond flick), the easiest way to describe the overall plot is by simply asking, "What does the villain really want, and need?" Well, after two long hours, it remains a mystery.