Does Whatever A Spider Can't?

Rating: 1/10 (7 July 2017)

From someone who has followed the adventures of the webslinger for decades, I believe that this may just be the worst Spider-Man movie ever made. It takes an established character who has over 60 years of history to draw from and tosses out everything that makes Spider-Man...well...Spider-Man.
Everything about this characterization can be summed up in one word: incompetence. This goes beyond bumbling or stumbling due to growing pains - this is a Spider-Man that can't seem to remember that he is freakin' Spider-Man! For example, when climbing to the top of the Washington Memorial, he suddenly becomes intimidated by the height that he standing at. Consider that for a moment - Spider-Man scared of heights! Isn't his most famous power the fact that he climbs and swings between tall buildings? Considering that there are over 100 buildings in NYC taller than the monument, surely he's been this high before.
I don't think he actually wins a single fight in this movie as well. If not for the interference of others (or their mercy), he would have lost every time. In fact, he doesn't actually beat the main villain at the end of the movie! If not for the fact that the Vulture decides to grab a crate of tech (that explodes) rather than finishing him off, then the villain wins and the hero is destroyed.
Tons of other internal inconsistencies abound - he's strong enough to catch cars but he can't punch through glass - he knocks himself out by jumping into the top of a tractor trailer but can have an entire building dumped on him without injury, etc.
He also lacks any concern whatsoever for protecting his identity - a problem with every Spider-Man movie before this to be sure - but here it is taken to new heights. By the end of the film, we have 6 individuals who know who Peter Parker is including the villain who figures it out within the length of a car ride. Not surprising considering he and his friend are always casually discussing it in the middle of crowded school hallways and cafeterias.
If you love the source material (comics), then do not watch this film. It will give you bleeding ulcers.