Maybe the worst movie I have ever seen ...

Rating: 1/10 (3 June 2007)

My wife and I were laughing AT this movie: the plot had no purpose until the last 1/3 of the film, the subplots meandered all over the place with no continuity or flow (probably the result of poor editing; the first hour felt like two hours!), and the inexplicable "black goo" from the meteor was ridiculous. It was like that joke in "Thank You for Smoking", where you can explain anything away with a bit of scientific dialogue: Dylan Baker's role was essential worthless, except for his two-bit contribution to the "black goo" subplot ("It's a strange form of alien aggression!"). Do the producers think we're stupid? Evidently.
Topher Grace was a disgrace; that character had no value whatsoever. At least the "Sandman" subplot had substance; it may have been the only redeeming part of the movie. The woman who plays Parker's aunt is also worth every penny you pay to see her; however, she's not the focus of the plot, obviously. The love triangle of Franco, Dunst and Maguire was stale after the first movie; stretching into three movies just made me yawn. I mean, we can only grasp the fact "MJ" sucks as an actor so many times, right? And what the hell was with that scene where MJ "dumps" Peter in the park? That was never resolved in the movie's plot, even as Lil' Osborne dies. Was Peter just supposed to forget that ever happened? Evidently, the editors thought we'd be stupid enough to not notice that plot hole.
The CG is not good for a movie of this stature; the Green Goblin Jr. scenes are just silly. The whole Parker-as-Travolta scenes are just cheesy; again, we were laughing AT the movie, not with it as I am sure the producers wished. All I can say is thank god we only paid $3.50 for our tickets to this horrible movie.