Spider-Man jumps the shark

Rating: 2/10 (29 December 2007)

This is a bad film and, by association, if nothing else, the other two have become sullied. I have to wonder if any of these films were ever any good. Maybe I've just been fooling myself.
Anyway, there is little to say in defense of THIS film and whether or not the other two are any good, this 3rd film has put me off watching them ever again. Because Sam Raimi has clearly lost the plot, if he ever had it.
The film is a complete mess. There are at least four story lines going on here, and they are rather clumsily intertwined.
First we have a look at Mary Jane's attempt at a singing career and why it fails. Of course, I was under the impression that she wanted to be an ACTOR, not a singer and that she seemed as if she would do OK as the former. It's an obvious contrivance but it's not the only one. BTW, this is the character at her utmost unlikable (and about as far from the original vivacious comic book character as possible).
Then you have Harry Osborne becoming the next Goblin. He sneaks up on Peter Parker while he's on his bike (btw, what happened to his Spider-Sense? It's entirely missing in this film) then starts wailing the tar out of him, until Peter finally turns the tables and knocks Harry out cold. After a brief scare that he might be dead, it turns out he's OK, except for partial amnesia (another weak plot point).
Then you've got the Sandman, yet another sympathetic villain (and one who comes by his powers for no other reason than that the plot requires it). In the comic, he was a thug (except for one short period) who's fairly powerful and menacing. Here, he's a caring father who pulled off a heist to get money to save his dying daughter (well cry me a river, why don't you?) and not very effective or menacing (and Thomas Haden Church, the actor portraying him, seems to concede most of the characters' screen time to a series of roaring and groaning special effects). During this heist, he accidentally shoots and kills Peter Parker's uncle Ben. The purpose of this otherwise purposeless alteration of the Spider-Man origin story is to present some sappy message of forgiveness at the end. YAWN! Why can't we just have villains that are jerks?
Oh wait, we do, in the form of Eddie Brock, a rival photographer who's attempting to land a staff job at the Daily Bugle. But if not for the major plot point of the squishy black glob from space, I'd say he comes off as little more than an after-thought. And his alliance with Sandman is never explained and never convincing. Add to that a rather poor performance by Topher Grace. That's not to knock Grace, though; I think he could have done better if there were time to focus on Brock/Venom.
Somewhat intertwined with this storyline is Peter Parker's turn to the dark side. The squishy blob envelopes him, giving him a black costume and he becomes Dark Spider-Man, one who acts without inhibition or remorse when dealing with his enemies or even his friends. We witness a campily embarrassing scene parodying Saturday Night Fever and another where he attempts to humiliate Mary Jane by interrupting her jazz number with his own (btw, it was never established, to my knowledge, that Parker played the piano).
Then, there's Gwen Stacy, a significant character in the comics, but here she's just reduced to nothing more than a weak plot device. (Also, in an ironic bit of casting, the actress's natural hair color is red, as is Mary Jane's, while Dunst's natural hair is blonde, just like Stacy's). Actually, she serves as a reminder of how the filmmakers dropped the ball from the very beginning. They failed to feature Gwen in the first movie and create a significant story out of it and now they're reduced to presenting the character as a cypher. Better not to have used her at all, I think(I've always wondered about wanton changes to comic book stories when they're adapted to film. I mean, these things are already STORYBOARDED and at least some of them are GOOD STORIES).
Added to this convoluted mess is the suggestion of a sort of "The Cult of Spider-Man." Footage of him shows up on giant screens; he's invited to and shows up at a ceremony to receive the keys to the city and get kissed by Gwen Stacy (part of another weak plot device); plus the final battle scene involving the Sandman, Venom, the Goblin and Spider-Man; and all the while you've got hordes of idiots screaming "Spider-Man! Spider-Man!" as well as a female and (for some reason) British reporter portentously describing the events of the battle. It is as embarrassing as described and it struck me that it was not unlike this in the other films, though those films were infinitely more watchable, if nothing else.
What's basically happened here is that at least a year's worth of comic story lines (Harry Osborne, black costume, Venom) is being ham-handedly smooshed into a story that already features the "touchy-feely" Sandman storyline and some angst-ridden crap about MJ. The final results aren't pretty. The movie should have focused more on Brock/Venom and left Sandman out of it. There was already enough to go on with Harry and Peter for another plot thread. The movie also could have, nay should have, done without Mary Jane's ordeals. And I think we've seen, and heard, enough of her being dangled off of something and screaming her stupid, red-dyed head off.