Wait till its out on video, and then only when its a weekly.

Rating: 3/10 (9 May 2007)

I think its best in any review to try and be balanced, to weight up the pros and cons, to be constructive with any criticism, and to praise where appropriate. So, in that context, I would just like to say that Spiderman 3 was a total dog's breakfast, and advise you to see something else.
Its a rare cinema experience to see so many keen and eager people at the beginning of a film, with their chatting, fidgeting, laughing and excited expectations; and then to have these same people at the end of a film realising that, despite their best intentions, they have been completely let down, and so they simply quietly disperse.
It fails because one senses the producers are more concerned about the survival of the franchise and the drive-thru burger license than the credibility of the story. You realise early on its all going to be so safely, completely and nicely resolved that any plot development is really only a distraction, and you start to wish the audience could have a show of hands to fast-forward thru the dull convoluted middle bits for the obvious showdown at the end.
Its such a bland soulless CGI affair that you serious start thinking that even a cameo appearance by Jar Jar Binks would improve it ("Me's a tinking me Jar Jar senses are tinkling"). At least Jar Jar would be able to hand over the award for most stupid CGI creation, with "The Monster from the Bag of Liquorice" now being clearly the most ludicrous creation of all time.
Forgetting all the logical inconsistencies and incredibly remote coincidences in the story (and thankfully, 15 minutes after you leave the cinema, you find that you do), the biggest sadness with this film is that the three characters, who you invested some emotional commitment to in the first two films, fail to develop or grow in any meaningful way. They just have a series of set pieces seemingly designed by a committee that is only missing someone in the background holding up a sign saying "They are Now Sad", "They are Now Happy", "They are Now Angry", or "They are Now Trying to Be Funny".
It you do intend to watch this film, watch the first two first; because after seeing Spiderman 3, you will find the first two forever tainted, as you know now where its all going to head. Oh; and the praise. The Morwell Cinema in Victoria has assigned seating. Fantastic idea guys, I wish everyone would do this.