Hippie Superheroes

Rating: 5/10 (24 July 2007)

I've never been impressed with Spiderman, to be perfectly honest. I thought he was all well and good until the movie came out, which sowed doubt in my mind about the whole license. If Spiderman is being true to the source material then I have been utterly tricked. Out and out, Spiderman is the biggest pansy ever committed to the silver screen.
While I hate to tarnish 75 years of tradition (or however long Spiderman has been in circulation), I feel that it has to be said that Spiderman has no edge. He takes one in this film but it's funny how this plays out. He acts like an evil emo hipster who does evil things like expose rival photographer's unethical photoshopping techniques (MY GOD PARKER, HOW COULD YOU), and then obsesses about how Sandman's gun went off in Uncle Ben's belly but for Parker to wish for his death is totally unbecoming. Especially amusing is the way that Parker snaps at the landlord who caustically reminds Parker that the rent is due - "You'll get your rent when you fix your door!" As if it was morally questionable in any sense to demand what you are promised, or set wrongs right, or god forbid, wish for someone's death every now and then (you know you have similar thoughts about someone at work). I understand Parker is a pure character... and yet the pragmatist in me utterly condemns him. Here he is, blessed with incredible superpowers, and he can barely support himself, let alone his aunt/surrogate mother.
Maybe I was an antifan from the start, I just never knew it.