No Good

Rating: 2/10 (5 May 2007)

I was hoping that after two mediocre films that the Spiderman team of Sam Raimi and his writers would wise up and provide us a movie that stayed true to the comic. Again, I was disappointed. Not only was I disappointed, I was angry. The main reason: in this 2 1/2 hour snooze of a flick only 20 minutes actually pertain to Spiderman. What is it with Raimi and his refusal to allow Spiderman a big fight scene that lasts for more than a minute? Or how about giving the fans what they want? An entertaining movie. No one goes to a film like this thinking, "I hope they show Peter Parker more, and Spiderman less." Enough rambling, lets talk about the film. The actors do what they can with the stinted dialog, especially Maguire. Thomas Haden Church does more excellent work here, absolutely running away with his half hour of screen time as the tortured Sandman. Topher Grace plays the same sarcastic, whinny character here as he did in That 70's Show and Traffic.His presence as Venom neither detracts or adds to the film. The special effects are so-so, looking like a video game at times. The script is essentially bad. It is a cliché ridden, uneven, annoying, overlong, and most importantly, boring mess. It seems like that the writers became so consumed with Peter and the gang's plights as friends, they totally forgot that they were making a comic book movie. They then added the last ten minutes of the movie, remembering what they were trying to do in the first place. It is especially sad that the coolest Spiderman villain ever, Venom, is shown for about ten minutes, does nothing to amaze us like good villain should, and is killed fairly easily. There is also a weird montage involving Peter and his new black suit, walking down the street cruising for chicks. It left me wondering, "What the hell is wrong with these people?" The bottom line is, Spiderman 3 is easily the worst comic book movie ever. It may even hold the title as worst sequel ever. (Congrats Godfather 3!) It is long and boring. It is completely void of thrills and purpose. I have been a Spiderman fan for as long as I can remember. It gave me joy and an escape from life. This Spiderman gives me nothing. Thanks Mr. Raimi!