Hollywood, please STOP

Rating: Null/10 (10 February 2005)

I just finished watching this movie on DVD, (6 bucks, "previously viewed" but probably liberated from someplace) after hearing Roger Ebert describe it as 'the best superhero movie ever' on his childish and slightly overblown, "best of" show. Uh okay...... First off, it must be the stress of being shown up by his younger co-host, or perhaps its the subliminal messaging in the paramount mountain, or the effeminate moon-boy on the dream works logo that did it, maybe its a work related injury.. damage to the cerebrum from a job that forces him to watch every movie ever made for too many years to think about without going cuckoo even the carrot top movie that no one saw because it makes people jump out windows and force their dogs to drink ink. Wait, could it be that film critics/eunuch-ed movie geeks, are paid off by studios to say this stuff? I mean their are certain movie websites, not unlike this one which purely exist as a medium for jerks to promote their own films (or fawn over someone Else's, don't know which is worse...)Could it be that a misguided culture desperate to objectify and make money off anything has elevated these losers to celebrity stature, and they don't take their jobs seriously anymore? I mean how serious could you be, when you host a television show? Critics once evoked images of Dorothy parker et.AL literati, evaluating aesthetics, creativity, talent, these days they just suck up to powerful studios between Shampoo ads. Hmmmm. Buddha say meditate on this. I watched an interview with Todd Macfarlane who had plenty to say about comic books and corporate culture. He posed the question: why can't spider-man be black under his mask? Interesting. Film reflecting relevant social issues, note: someone please crucify him or at least deport him to Europe with the other 'weirdos'.
Well, let's see why do black folks only get one superhero, and of course he comes from hell (spawn). Why do the ethnic superhero's have to avenge ghetto murders, why are their girlfriends dead or non existent? (ibid., the crow)? In short Mr. Macfarlane asks: why can't Superman eat watermelon for a change, Mr. Spielberg? Money & Politics, Todd. Whatever has the broadest appeal to the demographic is what's reflected on film, and to some extent it also serves as a way of perpetuating values of yesteryear with roots in racism, sexism, and sensational violence. These cookie cutter creations are supposed to be forgiven because they are admittedly somewhat entertaining, and of course they're, "y'know a summer blockbuster". This qualifier seems to mean that we're supposed to overlook how stupid the movie is, and just enjoy it, that is like a brain lesion triggering the aroma of burning toast, movie-houses awaken one's 5 year old inner child and ask us to abandon our standards and reason. I've been 5 years old before, and I think I'm ready for Hollywood to make some more 'mature' movies for a change, that don't require that I get drunk prior to viewing, in order to prevent throwing something at the screen. What ticked me off was the special features section on the DVD. It was illustrated to me how expensive this movie was and the neurotic attention to detail that went into making it. It seemed utterly absurd to me that these clearly educated and talented people (Laura Ziskin, and com-pats; minus the educated but including cute for some of the younger cast)could make such a predictable stupid movie. In fact why does Hollywood make such bad movies? Could it be that because as an audience we are to quick to say "y'know its a summer blockbuster", should we instead wake up and DEMAND more from these people? Sure we'll give you our dough, but how about hiring writers, and telling us a story we don't know? How about reflecting the world as it is, why not see people like, wow, us? Nope, instead studios have sold out a potentially artistic medium in order to stuff their pockets and ensure a spot at "Promises" and the DNC fund-raiser, in that order. I've officially stopped going to see movies I think cost too much, its immoral. Moreover, I won't pay a dime to watch the studio's chicken feed to the anesthetized masses, with their chalky and vapid stars, and insipid stories. I'm willing to bet that Ziskin and troupe, probably don't even watch their own movies. They're far too rich and Au currant to watch this junk, they're at the art-house cinemas, or their home cinemas? So who watches this stuff? Kids whose parents have to work late, and this stuff is like cyanide for the brain. Hollywood is corrupt, stop giving into their laziness and greed. Sure its entertaining, but don't kid yourself that something is really wrong with the fact that the only stuff that makes money is the fantastical escapism fare. I had read that the movie industry is at its peak during times of economic desperation, as was the case in the depression, there was a need to escape. Something is wrong when thats all a society's people want to do, i.e. television. Sure its okay to indulge in some eye candy as you slowly wean yourself off, like switching to menthol's to make your withdrawal easier. I'm just saying, demand more from the artistic community, and if they won't budge, at least wait for video or TV. Hope I'm not the only one out there! And oh yeah, its not the best superhero movie, its not even the best 'y'know summer blockbuster'. It didn't suck, its just stupid. ANd its sad that with all the resources they don't even try to do more, because its not
necessary that they do, little Timmy is in for merchandising and the price of admission, before the release date. Shame.