Silent uphill-struggle...

Rating: 5/10 (6 June 2006)

To stay awake mostly. Also to try and piece together the rather illogical plot and the idiotic character actions throughout the movie.
Admittedly, I gave up after a while, just letting the visual "goodness" wash over me. But there isn't much substance to Silent Hill. More like substance-abuse. Not since Event Horizon have I seen such relatively unnecessary levels of gore. And it's not as if it really adds anything to the movie other than to give it a distinctive visual style.
Forget the "plot" which, in the end, is a risibly simple witchcraft/vengeful spirit affair. Forget the characters, which quite frankly evoke no feelings of sympathy whatsoever from the viewer. Take away the graphics and the laughably (though unintentionally, I'm sure) monsters and there is little left other than the tale of a mother trying to help her daughter.
And what a mother! Hmmm! My daughter's having nightmares, drawing strange pictures and sleepwalking. What to do? I know! I'll drive across country to the town she's drawing and then.....oh well, I'm sure I'll figure it out when I get there! Oh no! A cop is pulling me over for some reason. She'll no doubt know I'm a raving lunatic who shouldn't be in charge of a kid and try to stop me! What to do? I know! I'll drive away at high-speed and REALLY give her a reason to chase me and arrest me! Ha ha! I've lost her...oops! Lost control of the car too! Clunk! And it all kind of goes (Silent) Downhill from there. I'm sure fans of the game may have more insight into what the Hell was going on, but I didn't. Why did the mad guy have a weird triangular head? Why did he have a blade six feet long and two feet wide? Why this? Why that? Why bother? It's a mess really which I don't think even game-conversion king Uwe Boll could have made any worse. In fact, I suspect he'd have done at least a much more amusing version involving visibly blunt Dural swords and maybe a cameo by a has-been star for good measure. As it stands, not really worth getting excited about unless all you want is eye gore/candy.
Silent Hill? Silent and Deadly.....deadly tedious, that is. Avoid it. It makes sniffing your own sweaty armpits a preferable experience.