Am I the only one?

Rating: 2/10 (22 April 2006)

"Are you kidding me?" That's all I could think after watching Silent Hill on opening night. I guess I can't complain all that much. I didn't exactly have the highest hopes for this movie. Most movies that are modeled after a popular video game end up sucking in a hardcore kind of way (see Doom,Tomb Raider, Super Mario Brothers, Resident Evil, Mortal Kombat,etc). The only thing that fueled me to spend some cash for the viewing of this movie was the fact that I love the Silent Hill games. I was wondering how Christophe Gans would translate the eerie feeling of hearing your radio go off...or the "holy crap" feeling of hearing a siren blast a warning to you that trouble was near. As the lights dimmed and I became engaged in the movie...I quickly learned that the acting was going to be far below par for a major Hollywood Blockbuster. Jodelle Ferland(Sharon) is one of the worst child actors I have ever had the displeasure to watch. Laurie Holden's (Cybil) acting left something to be desired. I could list all of the actors/actresses.....but it would all end up the same. Just poor acting all around.
The only excuse the actors could possibly have for their terrible performances would be to put it on their writers. Never in my day have I laughed so much at the dialogue in a movie. I'm not going to spoil anything for anyone...but just be on the lookout for some of Cybil's ignorant observations. The monsters aren't scary...not at all. I really did laugh out loud at the sight of some of the creatures. Don't worry though...it's not like you are going to care if anyone dies...you might actually cheer. If you are a fan of building up a character for an emotional attachment....you will be depressed at the result in this movie. I can't blame the director or the writers for this...because they had to take a game that took about ten or more hours to beat...and stuff it into a two hour flick. The game allowed you to care about your character because you were the character. The movie didn't have a certain "spark" that would allow you to feel for the people and what happened to them. The movie just felt clunky....as if it had something to say....but just couldn't spit it out.
Now that I've given you the bad part...I will try my best to shine some light on the good. The art design and special effects were very good. I thought at some points it felt a bit cartoonish...but not too much. I would also like to give props to Gans for taking on this task. Silent Hill is a very hard concept to bring over to the silver screen. He took a shot at it....though I felt he came up short of his mark. I would say that's about it on the good content. Sorry guys....it's just not that good.
This movie's overall lack-luster performances and B Flick horror creatures will more than likely leave you disappointed. The writers in this flick made George Lucas look like William Shakespeare. I wouldn't recommend this movie for anyone...UNLESS you are a DIE HARD Silent Hill fan. I still think even the most loyal of fans will be disheartened at the outcome. Let's just pray that someone in the not-so-distant future can take a good video game and make it into a great movie. That being said....don't hold your breath.......