Silent hill: a stupefying dud

Rating: 1/10 (30 April 2006)

I am normally of the Angelika Film Center persuasion (the indie mecca) but I thought for once, let's go see something Hollywoodish; my film major girlfriend seemed to go along with it; the mistake of a lifetime. Never has mankind's time on earth been wasted so badly. To think that people got around a table in some producer's conference-room and actually hatched this project is troublesome to me. The film is like one long cliché, with ridiculous one-liners ("don't worry, it's gonna be OK" as she prepares to face the ultimate powers of evil) and really really bad hair products (all the gory zombies look like rejects from a 'Thriller' video who've gone crazy with hair products. The movie is so bad, it's laughable (and laugh I did, no being spooked out here).
Rosemary's Baby or The Shing are worth a dozen of these. I'm not kidding when I told my girlfriend "there are people starving in this world and millions are spent this."