This Film Left Me Silent...I Fell Asleep.

Rating: 1/10 (4 June 2015)

Silent Hill (2006): Dir: Christophe Gans / Cast: Radha Mitchell, Sean Bean, Laurie Holden, Deborah Kara Unger, Jodelle Ferland: About as exciting as a bad bout of diarrhea. Here is yet another mess based on a video game. Some kid sleepwalks and has horrible visions about Silent Hill where something bad happened. Her mother travels there and battles demons, monsters, religious fanatics, and the urge to masturbate. This film is about as groundbreaking as the last dump I took and it makes about as much sense as pissing your pants above an open toilet. Director Christophe Gans fails to make any sense out of it but in his defence he probably thought that he had a winner because it is...BASED ON A VIDEO GAME! Woo-hoo! Radha Mitchell is totally expendable as the mother. With a performance this bad she would be lucky if any demons would even attempt to scare her. Sean Bean plays her husband who's searching for her. This whole conclusion where he and Mitchell cannot see each other while in the same room is about as exciting as your parents arriving at your fraternity party only to announce that you are going home immediately. Laurie Holden has a pointless role of police woman who gets burned to death. Deborah Kara Unger plays some crazy woman. Jodelle Ferland plays the creepy troubled daughter. Pointless crap should be met with silence. Score: 1 / 10