What Genre is this movie?

Rating: 3/10 (23 April 2006)

**MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS** (but do yourself the favor and read anyway)
After seeing this movie, I wondered to myself what genre best fits. Horror seems to not fit--I was not horrified, nobody I was with was horrified, and I think most people in the theater spent more time laughing than being scared, etc. There is a scene in the movie that had me waiting for Michael Jackson to jump out of the shadows in a red leather jacket--if you've seen it, you know what I mean. For much the same reason, Drama doesn't fit this movie. A drama presupposes that you care about the eventual fate of the main character, or ANY character, for that matter. I couldn't remember the name of the main character 20 minutes after seeing the movie, and to be honest, I'm not entirely sure her name is ever mentioned. I remember exactly one name from the movie ("SHARON!!") and only because of the repetition of that name in the first 45 minutes of the movie. Adventure seems closer, except for the single fact that the director tries so hard to scare the audience--not typical for an adventure film. It is definitely not an action film, as the pace is way to slow, the visual effects frankly suck, and there are no good explosions. Comedy can be ruled out immediately, except in the 'Evil Dead' sense. Finally, I know this will not fall into the 'cult classic' category, as there are no riveting performances, no unforgettable dialogue, and the film takes itself much too seriously. So what are we left with? Perhaps a musical. Well, perhaps not, but were it such, it certainly would have been better worth my time and money.