Not a movie for children

Rating: 9/10 (22 November 2016)

Warning: the following dialogue, taken from this movie, is not suitable for children and contains spoilers. You have been warned.
"S-Shrek-chan I don't think I'm ready.. I've never been with an ogre before"
"It's okay laddie" Shrek said in an understanding tone. "We're safe in mah swamp. No one has to know"
Jesus thought long and hard about this. His stiff member was reminding him how long it had been since he was with a woman. However, in the back of his mind he knew Shrek was just using him to satisfy his ogre needs. Though, a part of him wanted to be used. A part of him needed to be used.
"Oh Shrek Can you sing that song I like to set the mood first?" Jesus asked hopefully.
"Of course laddie. After all I did study opera at Julliard."
Shrek began singing with his angelic voice a haunting tune that had been passed down among the swamp folk for generations.
"Hey now You're an allstar. Get your game on. Go play. Hey now, you're a rock star. Get the show on. Get paid. All that glitters is gold. Only shooting stars break the mold"
"Clean up on aisle my panties" Jesus said seductively. He went in for the kiss.
Shrek stopped singing and they shared a passionate kiss but Shrek broke away.
"When are you going to tell your father that we're together?" Shrek asked concerned.
"I..I don't know Can't we just make love?"
"You need to come out to your father Jesus Better out than in I always say"
"Shrek-chan please stop I don't want to think about this right now!"
Just then they heard a knock on the door. Shrek got up to answer it, and was confused. There was no one there, or so he thought
"I'm right here!" Barry Bee shouted. He was so small since he's a bee that Shrek couldn't see him at first.
"What are yeh doin' in mah swamp?!?" Shrek asked forcefully.
"I'm sorry sir! I heard your singing from across the river and wanted to see where such a magnificent voice came from!"
"Shrek-chan, who is at the door?" Jesus asked as he approached the two.