A steampunk farcical desecration

Rating: 2/10 (17 May 2010)

For all those who actually have a clue about Sherlock Holmes, this desecration proves that Hollywoood is a dangerous bio-toxin: it kills what it touches. How could they possibly cast an American who doesn't even feel remotely English as Sherlock Holmes (anybody can spell Jeremy Brett?)or Jude Law for the slow-witted Dr Watson? The inane plot, probably whizzed up in a night of Californian fake "champagne" and some controlled substances, has nothing whatsoever to do with any Conan Doyle story, and is seated in a heavily steampunked London, which is a past of not our future, with a number of anachronistic details (radio is mentioned, guns look Far West improved by Luger Corp., pocket watches are of at least 50 years later build, etc). It also exhibits a number of holes the size of a whale. You will be delighted to learn that the finishing touch is to mix in a vaguely Masonic evil secret society à la Angels and Demons. Steer absolutely clear, put sandbags and barbed wire on your DVD player and refuse to get involved with this reinvented chemically pure drivel.