What a piece of junk

Rating: 1/10 (13 January 2010)

I am still reeling from the sheer terror of enduring this movie. It was a masterpiece of horror. It was a collection of platitudes and nonsense on a level that you rarely see in movies with this kind of budget. I can not find a single redeeming quality. Nothing at all.
Bad acting is excusable here, and I won't cover the obvious stiffness and discomfort of Jude Law. I'd be too if I was him. That wasn't the bad part though.
Holmes. Drug addict. Manic depressive perhaps. Prone to lock him self up in his room for weeks on end. Not good for the old physique. But oh, he's a veritable Bruce Lee meets the Karate Kid. Are you joking? Are you serious? I can suspend my disbelief with the best of them, but that is just too much of a stretch. It is actually too bloody stupid to even contemplate.
For half the movie you think you are watching some kind of a "Harry Potter has Grown Up" production. It is uncanny how much like Harry Potter they tried to make this thing. If I want wizards, I'll go see Harry Potter, the real one, thank you very much. No, Harry Potter is not an improvement on the old Dickensian movie look. Really. It's not.
Oh, and who let bloody Dan Brown into the script writers room. Honestly. The only thing missing was a bad cut to some medieval knight fighting some secret society in Jerusalem.
I hereby nominate Sherlock Holmes for the Turkey of the year, and I doubt any other will come close to this junk.