Hogan's Heroes was more realistic

Rating: Null/10 (15 September 2002)

If there was one thing that allowed the Nazis to almost take over the world, it was there revolutionary tank strategy - masses of tanks working in perfect co-ordination. In this film, single Panzer tanks just go wandering around the countryside at will, till they bump in to something.
This film is formulaic in extremis - every scene you've seen before, only better. You know the scene from a hundred films where a character is in the thick of tumultuous action, then ducks under water and it all goes silent, repeated 3-4 times? Well yes, that's here, only when the guy pops up all we get is a few popping and spluttering machine guns. The sound throughout this film is the worst ever in any war movie. Even the crumbiest soap operas today have the background hum in group scenes, bars, etc. Not here, you mostly just here the character in focus, the troop of soldiers standing around are silent. The claim to reality made by some must be down to ten dollars worth of offal spread around the bodies.
Even dialogue is without any conviction - people did use the f-word then of course but not in the repetitive way which has become the fashion now. In fact, the french referred to GIs as 'La Beetch' after the phrase which all GIs used all day long - "Son of a bitch". I didn't hear that used once in the whole film.
It is sad that such a ridiculously unrealistic and unbelievable film should be given so much ill-deserved credit. I would recommend "Cross of Iron", "The Victors" or "The Train" instead