A Travesty

Rating: 3/10 (30 March 2006)

There are many kinds of films. There are the few truly magnificent ones that change us while never ceasing to lose our attention. There are also the mediocre, abounding and forgettable.
Then there are the films so ridiculous, so contrived, so terribly self-important that it forgets its purpose in the first place, that it forever marks our memories no matter how badly we may wish to forget it. This film just may be the crown jewel of that entire lot.
Everyone knows the story. Two star-crossed lovers who despite their passion can not seem to overcome the chains from the family feud that should divide them, and by weaving a web of lies and secrecy end up destroying themselves with it. It remains more or less unchanged in the movie, aside from needed adaptations to suit the new time period, but it simply does not work. The play itself is rather contrived. To expect an audience to see people in modern day falling into the same pitfalls as their Elizabethan counterparts did is insulting to their intelligence. The director and writer does not go to any lengths to attempt to make it seem possible either.
Characterizaton is also changed, but whether it was really the writing at fault remains to be seen. The lines are almost always taken directly from the play, but atrocious acting could easily have twisted it. It certainly exists in large amounts. By far and large, the cast is horrible, with extremely overrated and miscast Dicaprio and Danes at the helm. Both resort to overblown and soap operatic acting to convey the emotional turmoil of their characters, and neither do it well enough to merit anything but a laugh.
The film is nothing if not imaginative, however. The cinematography is gorgeous, and many shots whimsical, lavish, and inspired choices on the director's part. However, this distracts from the dark, morbid tone of the story, and rather than complement it, it only makes the film lose impact during the important scenes. The director also uses gratuitous shots of Christ and crosses and wide shots to emphasize drama, but only manages to come across as full of himself in a Neon Genesis Evangelion-esquire move.
The Breakdown: Cheesy, over-dramatic, with terrible acting to boot. Not even worth a rental unless you're in the mood for a good, long laugh.