Romeo + Juliet + Luhrmann = crap

Rating: Null/10 (20 July 2009)

I watched this for about twenty minutes then I walked out, I made it up to Act 2, the end of the masked ball (for those who have read the play). I know it's probably wrong to review a movie when you've watched less than a quarter of It, but I have to warn viewers, stay away.
Baz Luhrmann's film takes Romeo and Juliet out of Verona, Italy four hundred years ago, and into the present day in what is supposed to be Atlanta or one of the southeastern U.S. cities. The film looks impressive, with accomplished set and costume design, but not for a moment does this feel like Shakespeare. You cannot take 16th century dialog and give it to contemporary character types played by talentless actors, it sounds dreadful. Hearing a ruffian American kid, say "Do you bite your thumb at us sir." as if it's status quo in modern speech, is an insult to the great playwrite. Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes may look cute together but boy do they stink at acting here. I imagine if I had made it to the ending, I would have cried with laughter not sorrow. Next to Franco Zeffirelli's film from 1968, or any other Shakespeare movie for that matter, this one is a a turkey.
If you have any respect for Shakespeare, do not see this movie.