Vader makes a choke!

Rating: 5/10 (21 December 2016)

Vader makes a choke!
Hi All, remember the good ol' days when Vader was scary? When his every word sent terror through your bones? Where his every gesture and nuance conjured fear and menace? Well fret no longer! Vader is back, but this time he has a comedy hunch-back and is cracking jokes!! He is even seen relaxing in his hot-tub before starting his day's work.
So, Darth was terrible. What did I like? Answer, potassium sulfate, the killer robot! K2SO4 WD40, to give it its full droid name.
Here's a great killer robot line from another movie:
"I think it would be better, not to die, don't you?"
Sonny, the title robot from iRobot had a great killer robot voice, almost on par with the killer robot daddy, Hal. So, in their wisdom the Disney execs decided "hey, Alan Tudyk was a great killer robot in iRobot, why don't we reprise his role to the letter in Rouge One?" (execs all nod approval). Now, for me, K2SO4 was the best character in the film, had the best acting (metallic!), the best lines, AND, the best voice! It was just a shame that he was already a robot from a different movie!!!!!
Real 3D, or Real (Painful) 3D.., for it was for me. Painful in my head (by the end of the movie, literally) and painful to my eyes, who watched with cardboard-ian disbelief. Things seems either flat, or blurred, or best of all, both. The best (worst) example being the opening "A Long Time Ago..", mostly everybody in the theatre were messing with their specs at this point! There were a few bits when I thought "cool!", but mostly I was left wondering if everybody else in the auditorium were seeing the same flat, dark, silhouettes that I was seeing. It really was a struggle to watch, so much so that intend to watch the movie again to see the bits I missed! (I think the movie may have been quite picturesque in 2D.., certainly there were tropical beaches and palm trees towards the end..)
Battlefield 1, yes, the EA WW-1 game. This was advertised at the start of the movie. It almost could have segued seamlessly into the movie itself, in fact it might well have done. Watching the tropical beach battle I was very much reminded of playing Battlefield (Wake Island). Perhaps war is like a computer game? Or perhaps Battlefield is a really good war simulator? Or perhaps pitching the final battle on a tropical beach resort was the cause of my confusion?
And then it ended. And the John Williams score started. That was the best bit.