Apes already conquered our planet!

Rating: 1/10 (20 August 2011)

What???!!!???? 8 points out of 10 for this crap??? Something's HORRIBLY wrong with IMDb, definitely... Is everyone mad?? Or are just apes voting here? Sorry, but I can't take it. The movie is a failure at all levels, starting with the hackneyed, formulaic script. It seems to me it was written out of those computer programs that tell you the exact moment for a plot point, a catalyst, an inciting incident, a subplot second act or you name it. Garbage. From the very first second of the movie you KNOW exactly what's going to happen and how things are going to develop for the rest of the movie. And that's NOT my idea for a good (or even passable) script!! Not to mention the feeble characters. Let's take a look at them: -the good scientist, played with his usual blandness by James Franco, -the beauty love interest (I suppose she is Hindu in order to attract moviegoers from that "emergent" market...), who happens to also be wise (surely she studied in the MIT) and cultured (she is reading Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar", hence the name of the ape... Oh, come on screenwriters, you could have done better!!), -the cold scientist (complete with goatee, as a hint that he's not a good guy), played by the great Brian Cox, alas!... -the bad corporation executive (why an Afro-American, guys??) -the very very bad zoo-keeper (complete with his usual companion, the retarded zoo-keeper)... Need I say more? Better let's not talk about the apes (the one-eyed bad ape, the brute gorilla with good heart, the suave and wise orangutan...): they don't even rise -no pun intended- to the category of character... they're just BAD animation!! And, finally, talking about animation: I thought if I wasn't to see a good narration, at least I was about to witness the usual "state-of-the-art" CGI show-off... And a show-off it was, sure... but in the wrong way. I mean: all that unjustified jumping around of Caesar... what's the point?? But let me tell you something else: if "Spider-man" was criticized regarding the unnatural movements of the CGI character 10 years ago, we are in the same point here. You can be very precise with the hair of the animals and the general depiction of the skin, eyes, gestures, etc (Andy Serkis: some day he'll get even the Oscar, I'm afraid). But the more wide and complex movements (jumping, running, fighting...) still are unnatural, unreal. Somehow the animators couldn't see the forest for the trees and the apes in them. Summing it all up: IF YOU SAW THE TRAILER, YOU SAW THE PICTURE, and saved money and time.