Let me describe the first 7 minutes for you, you'll thank me....

Rating: 1/10 (14 August 2013)

Let me get out of the way that I hate people who are trying to always find fault with movies, snickering at the slightest movement of a cup in the background from shot to shot, etc. So when I describe the first 7 minutes of absurdity in this movie, realize that I am doing it to illustrate just how phoned-in this script was in an effort to save you a rental fee (or know what a laugh you're in for). Onto the movie...
So we start with some chimps in the jungle. Then suddenly, African guys with AKs show up to scare them, droving them through a series of traps. One chimp gets caught and gets taken away in a metal box. It shouts in anguish and being taken from its family (seriously, it's the chimp version of KHAAAAAAAAANNNNN!!!!!! but drowned out by somewhat sad, angelic choir music).
Next scene, the same chimp is doing puzzles in a room with a handler/scientist and a video camera. The chimp is doing really well. James Franco taps on the glass observation window of the room carrying a clipboard, just doing his morning rounds. The handler tells him how well he's doing. Franco sees and in shock runs away yelling "Get me that video!"
He runs to the office of his superior and says the drug they're giving the chimps works and he wants to start human trials. His superior gives the usual "I speak only in terms of money and I have my doubts" spiel. Franco throws down what looks like x-rays onto the desk and says "The data is there, sir!".
What data? Do you know what data is James? And what the hell did you throw on the desk? Was that the papers that were already on your clipboard when you were doing your rounds? His boss says it's only one chimp. "One is all we need, sir." His boss replies "Take some more time" which is answered with "I've been working at this for 5 years!" I don't think James gets how science works. The boss looking at the paper seems convinced (seriously, what is on those pages?) but says he has to pitch it to the shareholders.
Next scene we're in the boardroom. They pitch this drug as a cure to everything neurological. Shareholders are impressed. Meanwhile a handler is being a dick to the same chimp, who they need to demonstrate its skills as proof. The chimp gets mad, so they have to lure it out and snare it (I don't know why either). It gets out and starts running around the lab between pipettes and MRI machines. Shouldn't this be a kennel sort of set up? At least have a door that keeps chimps who have gotten out of their cages from escaping entirely, surely. But no. It jumps around a lot and has an odd preference for jumping through plate glass (I count 3 times). The handlers grab dart guns.
The chimp is suddenly in the lobby of the company's headquarters. I know Pfizer does all their research on the 2 lowest floors of their skyscraper in downtown Manhattan. That's how much space research takes right? And why are their literally zero locked doors between the animal testing area and the lobby? That seems like a security risk. Our fuzzy friend jumps around, through another huge piece of glass which Franco's presentation is being projected on. Shareholders are terrified and hit the deck. Chimps are like black bears. Just curl up in a ball and they'll leave you alone. Or is that brown bears? The chimp roars at the power of standing on a boardroom table. Then gunshots. A security guard empties his clip into a room filled with the most important people in what must be a multi-trillion dollar company. The chimp falls dead and the handlers show up screaming "No!" In this company, lobby guards always know to draw down when wildlife get out. God forbid the chimp get out and then...do what exactly? It had been given a drug, not been infected with Rage. What's the BFD? The chimp dies, scene ends.
And there you go. That's what you're in for. Draw your own conclusions and hopefully my description of the movie has been more enjoyable than watching the thing was. A low bar, I'll admit.