How do you spell "moronic"??

Rating: Null/10 (10 September 2004)

Oh my god... When i think that my $ 9.25 could have bought some starving child a couple of Big Macs and I spent the money on watching this bomb...
My mommy always said to start any comments on two positive notes: here is the first: "the cast looks well fed". Now the second... Wait a minute, I cannot find anything positive to say!!! Finally, he is a second positive comment: "the trucks are clean and the wheels are well balanced".
This movie is really bad. Really... Milla Jovovich is laughably bad. Her last scenes are absolutely horrible. Sienna Guillory is painful to look at, please someone feed this chick!!
On the other hand, Oded Fehr isn't bad.
Being Canadian myself, I believe I have the right to criticize the typically Canadian-made cheap-*** look of this movie. The rule is simple: you can blow up stuff, you can shoot at stuff but never, never break anything expensive. During the movie, I could hear bean-counters in the background, worrying the movie was gonna break its low budget. The helicopter crash scene is a complete joke - you can hear the producer say "well, show the chopper in the air, then show it crashed, the audience will... imagine the crash".
The choice of location is an insult to intelligence for the Canadian audience... we can see about 10 Canadian companies logos in the backgrounds. Please.... "Raccoon City, Ontario"??
The plot holes in the story are wide enough to float an aircraft carrier sideways through them. The guy who wrote this movie should go back to writing stories for "Clifford the big red dog" or become script editor for the Teletubbies.
One last mean comment: how can a director screw-up the acting of zombies??? The zombies in that movie are the worst i've ever seen. In Raccoon City, "dead" equals "moronic looking". The extras on this movie should look for other jobs, like... playing heads of lettuce in grocery commercials.
Please, stay home and hit yourself on the head with a telephone book!! You'll save money, you'll have fun and you'll see stars that act way better than any of the cast!!