how can such a fast-paced movie be so boring?

Rating: Null/10 (15 March 2002)

maybe I shouldn't rip into this film so much, as I did see it at a free sneak preview. and I'm not really a gamer, only playing the "resident evil" games a bit, and mostly watching the game being played and picking it up at various points throughout. but I'm a huge fan of zombie/splatter/gore/horror films, and so therefore I can honestly say that if you're debating about seeing this film, my advice would be to skip it (or see it at a matinee, definitely not worth $8) and wait to rent it on video.
the strongest aspects of the best zombie films- "evil dead", "dead alive', "cemetery man"- as that they are irreverant and refuse to take themselves seriously. but paul anderson in "resident evil" takes himself much too seriously, which eventually ruins any promise the film might have had. I'm just wondering why I was bored throughout the flick. during the mansion scenes, the introductory office scenes, making the way to the Red Queen- sure there was the occasional scare and fright, but it wasn't until they shut the computer off that I thought "is it finally going to get interesting?"
perhaps I was just waiting and was expectant too much for the zombies. and they didn't disappoint. in fact, the special & visual fx of "resident evil" were quite good and was definitely a highlight to the film. as was the use of audio in providing the suspense and building tension. (although the score created by Marco Beltrami and Marilyn Mansion is garbage and unnecessary.) however, the acting was just putird. milla jovovich just CAN'T act. she's best when she just sits there and looks pretty w/o opening her mouth- as in 'dazed and confused' and 'fifth element'. sure she's a hottie, and it's quite obvious the paul anderson tried to come up with any reason to show off her body as necessary, but that's jsut sticking to the tired horror film cliche of showing the primary female in various stages of undress. nothing new there. and what's up with the complete obnoxiousness of michelle rodriguez's character. she delivered every one of her lines compeletely flat and her attempts at humor were ridiculousness. it got to
the point where I despised her character, didn't care that she was infected, and in fact felt pretty good when her character was offed. michelle sure has tumbled swiftly from her promising debut in "girlfight". you couldn't have done a more poor job casting for the two primary female roles. they definitely don't measure up to angelina jolie in "tomb raider", which although wasn't that great of a film, it is much better and more fun and doesn't take itself as seriously as "resident evil." the other cast members are incidental for the most part, though it did kind of bug me that the most gruesome deaths were saved for the characters of color. whats up with that?
and the plot kind of bugged me- I understand the computer's intent on killing everybody off once the toxin escaped, but the computer was also aware that the dead would eventually become reanimated, yet took no steps to take care of that eventual side effect, such as torching the Hive or something similar. it did have a failsafe programmed in, thus providing the countdown of our heroes having to escape from the Hive, but it was- in my opinion- too much time allowed with the possibility of escape of the toxin too high. and I didn't quite understand the rationale behind the crack team going into the Hive- the reason given was to find out why the Queen went homicidal and to take apart the mainframe, but ti seemed far too dangerous and unnecessary for me. then again, when you work for the shady Umbrella Corporation, I guess you jsut don't ask questions and blindly follow orders. even when they lead to disastorous results, as can be seen at the end of the flick.
anyways, its not as if this film is horrible or incredibly bad. I just found it boring. even Romero's epic plodding "dawn of the dead" I found more interesting than this flick- perhaps because it made me think and it stimulated my mind, whereas "resident evil" didn't. regardless, if you like loud/ fast/ zombie/ splatter films with half-naked babes and plenty of blood, then "resident evil" is the film for you!