god ? are you there?

Rating: Null/10 (26 November 2002)

I'm not going to waste your time, or try to be funny, this film is truly awful, I like action,I like zombies, I like gore, I like naked ladies, I hate this film. Should I list its offences, no, you all deep down know its shortcomings (even the ones who who think they like it). This, ahem !, director MR Anderson has to stop, stop writing , stop directing, just stop, because he cannot do any of those things, you see, B&Q's wharehouse awaits good sir, sorry I said I was'nt going to try and be funny, and this is not funny, if sources are to be believed,(yes, dinner time spent on "aint it cool"), MR Anderson is to turn his considerable lack of talent to "ALIENS VS PREDATOR", and here we reach the rub good friends. What made "ALIEN" , "ALIENS" and "PREDATOR", good films ?, would it be fair to say, very good directors, all roughly at the beginning of their careers as well known directors, I think so, directors who know how to build tension, character, emotion, and manipulate special effects to accentuate those elements, of course, but we know somebody who cannot do those things, dont we ? I said I was'nt going to try and be a smart arse, and I did a bit, and I'm sorry, I'm also sorry that it appears a film ,which in the hands of a new, talented director, just breaking through, that did have the possibilty of rising above a gimmicky concept , and could have turned in something really good, but is now doomed to live out its miserable existence, in hacksville , is heading our way, what a shame !