Garbage

Rating: Null/10 (17 August 2002)

I don't know what kind of drugs you have to take to make this movie seem good, but it's one of the most overwrought, pretentious pieces of crap I've ever seen. All the characters sound like a bunch of Gen-X hipsters sitting around on a second-hand couch smoking bongs. If I wanted to hear a bunch of doofuses deconstructing Madonna lyrics, I'd hang out at the local coffee shop. Or I'd stick my head in the oven. Or something. But if I want to see a good crime movie I'll stick with The Maltese Falcon, The Grifters, Miller's Crossing; hell, even 101 Dalmatians is a better "film noir" than this overrated stinker.