The value of life, packed in suffering and pain

Rating: 10/10 (23 December 2006)

I haven't read the somewhat 1400 comments on this movie,but I'm pretty sure that many of them tell the same. This is the only movie I've ever seen that I don't ever want to watch again, for no money in the world. But it's also one of the greatest I've ever seen.How do these things go with each other? Well, I'm a very empathic person with experience in acting, and no movie ever before could touch me so deeply and make me burst into tears. Why? It is so unbelievably cruel, honest,dark, hopeless and yet so revealing concerning the precious gift of life and the things that make it worth living. When I watched it about half a year ago, I had no idea what it would be like, I thought, well, maybe a pretty good movie about drugs, I also hadn't read the novel which I did now, it's almost as disturbing as the movie.Anyway, after about 45 minutes I had to fight to stay in front of the TV because I felt and experienced everything the characters did and I thought I couldn't stand it any longer, I thought I'd go insane. Especially the fast cut-scenes in the end and the unbelievably disturbing sound were almost more than I could sustain. I have some experience concerning drugs, and some shown feelings and situations were not new to me, but so was the brutality and honesty they were shown with, free from all disguises and useless package. When it was over I couldn't stand being alone and went to a friend, who used to live in the same house. When he opened the door he immediately asked what was going on with me, because I was so pale. I told him I'd seen the movie and he just smiled and said: "Oh, alright, I understand, with me it was the same." And then we talked about it, for more than five hours, and after a certain time I realized we weren't talking about the movie anymore but about life in general, about our hopes, dreams for the future and so on. At that point I understood the movie's value and also its beauty. It leaves you, as Frodo says in The Lord of the Rings, naked in the dark, and it's up to you to figure out whatever can help you get into the light, which means, what can make your life rich and fraught with love. And it shows that, no matter what hell we are going through, we need love to survive and we have to fight for it 'til our very last breath, like Harry Goldfarb does in the movie. If I ever gave a 10 here on IMDb for a movie without thinking, I do it for this one. Parents, if you want to prevent your kids from taking drugs, show them this movie and talk about it afterwards, believe me, they won't ever even touch a joint! After I've read some comments now that say those who like this movie don't live in reality, I have to update mine. I can give you guys only one answer: Sorry, but it's you, this movie is reality! I had a lot of friends who died from drugs and I saw them during their last time alive, two of them committed suicide. I know what they were going through and how they felt. And you want to tell me this is unreal and they just got what they deserved? You make me sick! Don't talk about anything you've no idea about just because you're afraid!