The Ukraine girls really knock me out

Rating: 5/10 (10 November 2008)

But why cast a Slavic sexpot when you really want a Brazilian bimbo? I'm talking about Olga Kurylenko of course, featured to advantage in "Hitman" as an oligarch's wife. In "Quantum of Solace", she plays Bond's sexy sidekick Camille. Trouble is she's been twisted, tweaked, and tampered with so much that you hardly recognize her. If you've seen her before, you know she's long-limbed, fair-faced, smart and stunning. But what do they do? Her sexy rack, they smear it with rust protection. Her pretty face, they spray-paint it with glitter. Her sharp eastern accent, they turn into a lame Latina croak. What a shame. The same is true for the movie as a whole. It's covered by so many layers of make-up it's almost impossible to say whether there's something good underneath, or anything at all. So thin is the fabric of the script that Bond even reverts to stealing from Bean: Mathieu Amalric, in the part of deco-villain Dominic Greene, is clearly channeling John Malkovich as Pascal Sauvage, the Greedy Frenchman in "Johnny English". I confess, however, to having enjoyed the car chase. I think it's a first, even for Bond, to shatter the Aston before the opening credits roll.