Tries too hard, doesn't know what it is

Rating: 5/10 (7 June 2012)

Prometheus is not a prequel to Alien. OK, we get it. Personally all I wanted was for it to end with terrified giant elephant-man trying to run, but we all know what happens - obviously it doesn't. The problem isn't that Prometheus isn't an Alien film. It's that it tries too hard to pretend it's not an alien film, when it actually is. First things first, the 3D is great. The acting is very good too. The aesthetic part, though apparently much praised, didn't really impress me. In a nutshell, TOO LITTLE GIGER. But the major trouble is the plot. Here you have mr Scott, telling us after 30 years that oh, you know, that's not a trunk, it's just the helmet of a giant human. Half the wonder around the Space Jockey was that he was a mystery creature who knows from where who got killed by a xenomorph who knows how. Well, the best answer they came up with was "giant humans who created mankind"? Why then not stick with the Predator idea (even that)? Oh, and it's not the Space Jockey, just some other guy who does the same job. Then, you don't want to focus on Aliens. So you come up with facehuggers who aren't facehuggers, except they are, just with a different design. That will fool people. It's not like aliens already have a gazillion different forms and reproductive ways, let's now make them come from gigantic octopuses too. Most amazingly of all though, for a film that claims it explores a different story within the alien universe, it tells you next to nothing of this new story; and by next to nothing, I mean actually nothing. Giants who made/carried cylinders that slightly remind of alien eggs but contain worms that kill you or impregnate you for no obvious reason wake up a few thousand years later to go to earth, where they created life(?) for no obvious reason, to attack it for no obvious reason*. And no, a "wait for the sequel, it will have an Alien" simply won't do. It's not a bad film; but if you're an Alien fan, it is disappointing, even if you knew it wouldn't be directly linked. *PS: also, the android (easily the best character) poisons one of the doctors for absolutely no reason.