Disappointing... of course. But why ludicrous?

Rating: 3/10 (11 June 2012)

Spoilers!! But thats why you may be reading this. After watching Prometheus today the first thing i said to myself was 'ok - i'm going to check the reviews on IMDb to see if other people found that as dumb as i did'
i'd read the mainstream reviews and they said very little and on the whole seemed very forgiving. I liked the acting generally and the CGI and scope is stunning. As others have said its not bad and you don't want to leave but as it goes on you're thinking 'OK i'm going to ignore that as i've been looking forward to this and i'm not going to ruin it because i'm getting hung up about ... that... and that... and that... the warning bells begin soon enough and it becomes a veritable tsunami of nonsensical situations that are B movie through and through.
i like SF, with 3 kids this was the first chance for me to see adult cinema for 7 or 8 years. So i wanted to not ruin it for myself and i'm still trying. i've looked at other reviews and tried to come out with some decent SF explanations. i'm also an OBGYN so i guess I can comment on the Caesarean surgery scene.
Plot holes with me trying to give a decent explanation which really should not be necessary 1. The dreams sequence. Yeah OK its SF but i think if this complex, open to abuse, tech was around they wouldn't let the creepy robot be checking everyone out in stasis
2. How did they get to the installation so quick? There are many minor details like this that i'm not going to bother with as they don't really effect the story and it doesn't bother me that much - I'm a fan!
3. Why were the crew Hollywood stereotypes? Sigh, no Main Stream Movie can escape.
4. The mapper geologist ? he gets lost in the space of a distance that the heroes cover in a minute down one way tunnels. that was really poor and there is no excuse for treating the audience like fools. but i forgave it at the time
5. Touch the cobra alien? Especially after just having witnessed a heap of crumpled dead bodies - not believable but maybe IQ's have dropped in the future. Best i can do for you Ridley...
6. Why on earth would a scientist remove their helmet? Well covered in other reviews. Ridiculous.
7. What does this black slime do that the robot just grabs for himself and proceeds to murder one his crew-mates with? we see the goo at the start where i think they are trying to say that this is the way these Engineers seed a planet and dissolve their DNA into the planet at ground level... otherwise what was that opening scene about?
8. The entire head scene is amateurish B movie stuff where i think they were paying homage the original alien...
9. Why does the head explode? See B movie.
10. Then the geologist comes back as a zombie. OK i needed some shooting...
Now 11. The 'pregnancy' - ' the laws o physics captain'
If the alien is going to get to chest-burster size within 10 hours from bodily fluid stage then it would have to be implanted on a huge blood supply - one that would be fatal for removal. Just like in 'Aliens' where people were killed removing them before Ripley and the cavalry got there She is supposed to be infertile. Did she have a hysterectomy? Maybe the pregnancy is not in her womb. An ectopic pregnancy is even more deadly because it doesn't come off its blood supply without major hemorrhage so thats no explanation
12. The 'birth' surgery - i may be able to help here as i've done several thousand myself.
To make this scene sensible all the machine needed to do was say 'Yes' - prepare for emergency Cesarean surgery - a messy operation with gore aplenty. but no its blokes only.... wait though its still zip zip and the gelatinous face-hugger is removed from somewhere (but not her uterus by the lack of blood), for a blokes machine the equipment used to remove the alien is a pair of obstetric forceps... i'm happy with a quick spray and jabbing yourself with a needle for pain relief but i'd imagine there are a few women in the audience thinking 'i couldn't walk for 24 hours after my Caesar' so its taking the mickey a bit. A few staples and she is good to goand how. Just a really naive scene where alien did it all so much better.
14. There was no point to half the people there - those 2 copilots when offered a year marooned in a survival boat with Charlize Theron say 'nah - i'll just die thanks'.... Hmm OK.
15. The Vickers line... what was the point in any of it?
18. Why does the tentacle creature expand at such a rate? after the birth it obviously hooks itself up to 20 IV's and chows down all the steroids in the hospital. i give up....
If i can help in one way i think its to say that i think it was a queen birthed at the end, and i think they are trying to say these things can take their hosts DNA on board and evolve to be at least part human...
Sadly this team cannot be allowed anywhere near any Bladerunner sequel.