A Major Disappointment...

Rating: 1/10 (13 September 2015)

"Alien" was a classic. This is yet another hypey Hollywood blockbuster that was forgotten immediately after viewing. I saw it the week it came out, in 3D. Re-watched it again just now, and it's still crap.
One word to describe the movie: "disappointing". Why? Because it felt rushed, severely under-developed, inconsistent, poorly put together, unrealistic, amateurish, and, at times, downright laughable.
Lots of WTF moments. Scientists basing most of their rationalization and decisions on "this is what I choose to believe?" It's a trillion dollar mission, yet no-one seems to know why they are there and what's expected of them? Taking your masks off on an unfamiliar planet, where air could be contaminated? What do you do when you make the most important discovery in the history of mankind -- get drunk, of course!? A guy who freaks out when he sees a dead alien body then decides to pet, and play with, an unfriendly-looking alien cobra? Running around with your abdomen sliced open and held together by a few metal staples? Giving birth to a squid less than 24 hours after intercourse with an infected individual -- and you don't tell anyone, and nobody notices, and having wanted it out of you so badly, you forget to kill it once it's out? Seeing that you're about to get squashed by an incoming alien space craft, instead of moving sideways, you continue to run *away* from it? Are you kidding me? Ridiculous. This half-arsed movie is unwatchable! It's an insult to human intelligence.
And as soon as the team meet "our creators" (for some reason, there's only one -- and he is a moody bald bodybuilder that has been abusing steroids?), the creators immediately rush to their ship to get to our planet and destroy it? Jeez, they had that option for, like, centuries; why now? Why are they hostile towards us in the first place? Not clear.
I think most of the characters were totally unnecessary. Some of them served no purpose whatsoever. It's like they had a lot of spare money, and decided to spend it on employing more actors for no apparent reason. The people behind this movie should have used the spare money to pay a competent screen-writer to review the story-line and dialogue, both of which were a complete joke in my opinion.
P***-poor acting by Charlize Theron. Jeez, she cannot pull off a role like this, sorry. The lead female was half-decent; the rest were not very good. Zero character development. The characters were unlikeable and not at all interesting. Plus, none of them could pass for an actual scientist; not in a million years. And speaking of characters: where did they all go? Some of them were killed, but what happened to the others -- it was never explained; they just vanished.
You know, watching this reminded me of watching daytime soap, honestly. Boring, over-dramatized, completely unrealistic. No tension, no suspense... just a bunch of poorly-chosen random people getting paid to act out a ridiculous script.
Some reviewers have described this movie as "thought provoking"... Well, I assure you I'm not being sarcastic when I say that I've seen some episodes of Barney the Purple Dinosaur that were more though-provoking than this. The only thought it provokes, is this: why was this movie necessary, and who is the target audience (the mentally handicapped or pre-schoolers)? The only good thing I can say about this movie: good scenery (especially in 3D). But people go to see movies primarily for the story, so the visuals alone are not quite enough, sadly.