Disappointing beauty.

Rating: 6/10 (31 May 2012)

(31/05/2012, Antwerp)
Yesterday evening had finally come. There I sat in the best seat of the theatre, the air teeming with the smell of hyped anticipation and slight nervosity. There was a healthy amount of Belgians and Dutch people present in Kinepolis Antwerp, but I wouldn't say the theatre was chock-full.
With 3D glasses on (for the first time) I was in anticipation of awesomeness. The first thing I noticed, while watching a cool trailer for The Hobbit, was that I found the 3D absolutely awful. Luckily it wasn't bad at all during Prometheus, which did a very good job as far as the 3D goes. Anyways, I will not be watching movies in 3D again, as I still find it incredibly gimmicky.
Okay, on to the real deal. Prometheus.
You'd think a search for the origin of mankind would be full of danger, conflict, excitement, wonder and probably a little bit of terror as well. Prometheus shows us it's primarily quite boring.
Even people who have never before written a novel or screenplay know the necessity of tension and release, of carefully paced out highs and lows, of a gradual build-up towards a climax. Prometheus proves us even well-paid professionals can be quite oblivious to these basic writing rules and that they can be happy about a story as flat as sweet Noomi's bosom, even though it looks stunning on the whole.
I can only tremble at the foresight of the vast tidal waves of hate that will soon reach a certain screenwriter, but I won't add to that. I will however be very wary of any film that this person is involved with from now on, that's for certain. (In case you're still unsure who I'm talking about, it's NOT Jon Spaihts, as I know he is capable of great things.)
However, even though it pains me to do so, there is someone else who I'd like to point my finger at in disappointment, someone who I know to be incredibly skilled: Sir Ridley Scott. Someone of his calibre should've recognized the weaknesses in the script and demanded they throw entire pages straight in the recycling bin. "A very interesting and fascinating take on things, boys, but please do rewrite most of act 2 and especially act 3. At once, if possible." That's what he should've said.
Alas, he did not, which means he was pleased with the result. A very painful mistake, Sir Ridley.
Just as troublesome is the fact he didn't deliver what he promised: "I'm looking to scare the living crap out of people." The etheric smell of rosemary and mint my boxer shorts are still spreading upon inspection (as always) is proof of the contrary. For an evening of intense terror I'd recommend watching another film (Alien would be a great place to start if you haven't seen it). Even the (minimal) work of H.R. Giger couldn't get me into the state of anxiety I longed for. By the way, it doesn't take long to realize the monster design in Prometheus did NOT spring from Giger's sinister brain, that's for certain.
If Ridley truly lost it, then I'm afraid I'd rather not see a sequel to Blade Runner.
Okay, all this would almost make me forget all the good things about Prometheus. The cinematography and special fx were absolutely breath-taking (we CAN thank Ridley for the former), the music was really fitting and well-placed during editing (even though it isn't particularly memorable), the acting by primarily Noomi Rapace (I still love you <3) and Michael Fassbender was excellent, and the set design was hot. Yes, hot.
To conclude: + cinematography (also excellent 3D when compared to the trailers before the film) + effects + sound + acting (Rapace, Fassbender) + set design - script is ridiculously flat, very underwhelming "climax" (if you can call it that) - story tries to be deep, but it really isn't - most characters feel like nothing but cannon fodder, one-dimensional - little emotion - monster design
Others did kind of like the film however, so I recommend forming your own opinion. But be warned. I also want to point out I had high expectations, like most of us. But it pains me to tell you I was wrong. We were so wrong.
6/10
PS: Noomi, thanks for the mint and rosemary. <3 x