Ghastly Muck

Rating: 4/10 (24 June 2012)

Billed as an original myth set in the Alien universe, the story revolves around a team of scientists - of highly dubious ability - who set off to meet and speak to our makers. Predictably, things don't go as planned and the rest is told via an appalling script and amazing - but somewhat derivative - visuals.
Rather than the film being simply set in the Alien universe, it beats us over the head with a near constant stream of Alien references which merely serve to remind us how amazing Alien is compared to this claptrap.
Prometheus is bursting at the seams with religious symbols, but these are never fully explored, resulting in a rather 'Inception'-like experience, where stupid people will be made to feel they have watched something 'deep' and the more switched on viewer will recognise this for the charade it truly is.
Giger must be laughing his head off at the creature designs in Prometheus, which are the sort of thing you see in comedy horror films. And, whilst the set designs are based upon his work in Alien, they just do not have the haunting and disturbing quality of the original design ethic.
Worst of all by far is the writing which has no focus and sees people acting in ludicrous ways which defy motivation. The dialog is comprised of lines such as, "if you go down there you will all die", or, "I love rocks!!", or perhaps, "I am only here for the moneeeey!". Truly embarrassing stuff that will have you hiding your head in your hands every five minutes. Add to this a few utterly predictable reveals, an ending only for fanboys and science that even a 4 year old knows is baseless and you have the least watchable film of the decade to date.
The only reason to watch this film is to have a Mystery Science Theatre 3000 style evening with friends, where Prometheus will provide you will ample opportunity to snigger at its many shortcomings.