Shame & Ignorance but not Pride & Prejudice

Rating: 1/10 (19 December 2015)

This should not be considered an adaptation of Austen's Pride & Prejudice. It is far more like somebody has tried to build a script from a high school pupil's crit of Austen's Pride & Prejudice. Unfortunately, they chose the crit of a decidedly below average high school pupil who could only relate to the story by turning it into a teen soap opera.
This film simply does not deserve it's name nor it's association with Austen's work.
There is honestly nothing to like about this film. It beggars belief that so many talented and high profile actors were prepared to associate themselves with a project so rotten to its core and in every single aspect.
The writing is truly appalling. It is one thing to take a few liberties with a novel when condensing it into the comparatively short form of film. It is even understandable that the language will have to be dumbed down a little for a mass market. However, the hatchet job done here on Austen's dialogue is unforgivable. It strips the story of all meaning leaving only the blandest and most uninspiring of insipid, middle of the road romances. It strips the characters of all intelligence, humour and insight leaving only dull, spoiled, nonsensical blobs trundling forward without motive or cohesion.
Every aspect of the dialogue, story, direction, sets, hair, costume and make-up relating to the period is crude and downright wrong. It is like watching a cross between a Disney cartoon and the worst of those 60s/70s period pieces where everything was a pink and orange polyester version of Victoriana regardless of actual period. It even has the ugly fruit sorbet vomit tint to the colouring.
Whilst, there was a lot of acting talent on offer, the leads were woefully miscast and are two more appalling points of this awful film.
Knightly's acting aka open-mouthed gawp is the polar opposite of the bright-eyed and subtle humour that belies Elizabeth's intelligence. However, the addition of some very obvious filler to the top lip said open- mouthed gawp does at least provide very welcome distraction from every other aspect of this film.
Macfadyen looks flabby and bloated and that is the best description possibly of his performance. Darcy is also supposed to be intelligent with an air of superiority. Macfadyen looks like the stablehand, who was already a bit simple before the horse kicked him in the head, has been asked to impersonate Darcy because the real Darcy couldn't stand the stupidity of the company on offer.
Between them, the challenging eye-contact and meaningful, longing glances of Darcy and Lizzy become the confused, expressionless, empty glass-eyed stares of someone who has had far more than one too many and is struggling to stay awake on the ride home (or the kind of glazed, bored beyond belief yet confused expression you'll have watching this film).
If you enjoy Austen, don't watch this - it is worse than you can possibly imagine.
If you have never read Austen, don't watch this - it is just a really really bad film.