More Jane Austen crap.

Rating: Null/10 (28 August 2007)

First of all, what a dull novel! I, like many other defenseless (ex-) school kids, was tortured in English class with this overrated drivel. No, not Mark Twain or Edgar Allan Poe. No, it's Jane Austen's soap-opera nonsense for the 19th century that is so often chosen for literature classes all over the (English-speaking) world.
A bunch of hormonally-stricken, very bored sisters (there was no TV or internet back then) play a game of "who-gets-whom", while a parade of men strut around, hoping their alpha-maleness and/or cash will impress the lonely/solo/unpicked/free females that surround them and regularly foam on the mouth. This crap gets yet ANOTHER version to its name, as if all the BBC shows and other movie versions weren't enough. Every time one of those sisters excitedly screams about some officer or hot (or rich) stud, I wanted to press "stop" on the remote control.
Pride? Prejudice? Don't be fooled by the pretentious title, all ye who art uninitiated. This is NOT a "deep" account with insightful or dare I say philosophical aspects. It's your average 25-cent pulp novel all wrapped up in nice (read: old = respectable) clothing. Occasionally, some character will say something semi-intelligent, but it's not much more exalted than the usual fortune-cookie stuff.
The cast. Keira Knightley is an unbearably poor choice to play the "hottest" sister, the female lead. She is as unsuitable for this role and time period as she is to being an actress. Very little talent, and "charisma" that consists of the viewer feeling sorry for her for her anorexia and lack of breasts. She is, however, at her most annoying when she SMILES: she does look like an alien in those moments. Watching her silly-shaped mouth form a smile made me squirm and sweat, and believe me it wasn't sexually exciting or anything like it. But why wonder? She is the daughter of successful actors, i.e. the doors were all open for her from day one. Jena Malone was cute and lively, Brenda Blethyn is a good actress, Macfadyen is a good choice for the "legendary" Darcy, but all of that isn't nearly enough to save this crap.
Pride? Prejudice? Feel free to be prejudiced against this crap (i.e. don't watch it) and your pride will remain intact. You can proudly say: "I did NOT watch the latest Jane Austen drivel!" I wish I could say that!
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