Not only my favorite action film, my favorite film ever.

Rating: Null/10 (13 March 2003)

<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>> When I think of movies that I enjoy, and movies that really flow well, none compare to my all-time favorite movie, The Predator. There are several reasons why the predator is just hands down the best movie ever, ranging from the cast, the visual/audio splendor and the overall feel of the film.
Obviously, someone put in some serious time behind the scenes to make this film what it is. The visual effects of all of the human-only fight scenes makes this a worthy action film, and when you couple that with the predator's visual effects, it stands head and shoulders (just the the Predator itself) above all else. The sound on this film is excellent. Dialogue is understandable, gun shots loud, and ooooh the creepy noises the Predator makes.
The cast...what can be said about the cast? Quite possibly the best possible cast ever assembled for any movie.
Arnie played Dutch like a fiddle. All of his one-liners were timed the way only Arnold can time them, and every time I saw him he looked bigger and bigger. The Cool-guy beard, the cigar, the messed up war-paint...it's so perfectly macho that you don't know what to do but stare.
Carl Weathers was perfect as Dillon. You liked him, but only as far as you could throw him. Sure he may have lied about a few things, but I think everyone makes different truths at times. He got his job done at least. In Rocky, he looked like he was in good shape. In Predator, he looked like a mammoth (if only his muscle scenes weren't next to Arnie's...shame shame shame)
Hawkins was good for comic relief, but he also gave you a character that didn't need to be there for the entire film. You liked him, but they made him just nerdy enough that you were okay with him "hangin out" instead of going on with the rest of the group, if you get my meaning.
Elipidio Carillo gave me pleasant dreams when I was younger because of the scenes in this movie...not your typical blonde bombshell, but enough spice to be just nice.
Billy was very, very well done. Sonny Landham is a cinematic formula for successful action: Good-sized + crazy eyes + cool knife = perfect action tough guy.
Bill Duke did such a good job as Mac that I do a double take every time I see him in anything else. If I see him in another movie, I expect him to say "Anytime..." or his more hysterical "gonna have me some fun....gonna have me some fun..." Plus you gotta love a guy that can enunciate so well under stress: (SPOILER) When he and Dillon are preparing a flush-and-shoot to get the beast, he says "Out there...past them treeeeeeeeeeeeees" you can totally hear every syllable being drawn out like road map.
Poncho was a good guy to have as a stabilizer. He didn't have the gruff toughness all of the muscle-head actors had, but his quips were timed as well as Arnie's, and he seemed to have some determination. I especially like his quip to Mac about "Think you could have found something bigger?" Another good one: "Strap this on your sore rear-end, Blaine (he actually didn't say "rear-end", just to let you movie review people know I DO actually know the movie)
Gov. Jesse Ventura was something else entirely in this film. I will simply list his awesome characteristics, and that should be enough. His big hat. His M-TV shirt. His BIG gun (methinks he was the first of many action stars to use a helicopter "mini" gun as an assault rifle.) The fat cleft in his chin. The chewing tobacco. Plus, he had the three absolute best lines in any movie ever: Line #3 "Old painless is waitin" (it loses some points since he was saying it to a goofy opossum-porcupine-hedgehog or whatever it was). Line #2 "I ain't got time to bleed" and Line #3 (which I think he should have used as his campaign slogan when running for governor): "You're a bunch of slack-jawed FA_ _OTS...this stuff'll make you a god-damn sexual tyrannosaurus...just like me"
The Predator...well played, despite notable lack of dialogue. No real good on-liners from him, but we'll let it slide. Very sad the Kevin Peter Hall passed away in '91, but his performance as The Predator was perfect. He sort of loped around. He never seemed to be in too big of a hurry. If I was 7'2 with that gear, neither would I.
Even the auxiliary characters were well done. The General seemed just the perfect amount of strung out and nervous. The long-haired South American who jumped into the ill-fated truck (that Arnie lifted in first major battle scene) seemed pretty jovial, which is realistic in rebel camps. I say that as if I have experience in rebel camps...well, I have seen several in Hollywood films, so that makes me expert enough.
<> One thing which I would like to point out that SO many people have seen as a "goof" or an editing error was the Predator's vision (Pv). At the end of the film, when Arnie gets whooped by the predator with all of the Predator gear, the predator takes off his mask to make it a fair fight. Initially, his vision is horrible. Almost a flat red-screen with little or no definition to anything, then it miraculously becomes heat-seeking vision like, 37 seconds later. I believe this is not an error. It's called adjusting. Turn off all of the lights in your house, be in darkness, and run around trying not to bump into anything. Then, wait 37 seconds, and try again. You'll notice the second time, you didn't hit that stupid chair that shouldn't have been in the pathway. Well, this is similar, I believe, to the Pv. His vision takes a few seconds to adjust to the lack of mask, but once he does, he can see heat. Whereas we gain visual definition, he gains heat definition. Not that complicated when you think about it. So I'll shut up about it. Oh yeah, one possible reason for his vision being all red again after Arnie drops the huge log on him: He just had a huge log dropped on him. Give it a try, I guarantee you will see things differently.
This film was so amazing. It wasn't the massive assault of aliens, like some movies, with mindless creatures being killed by twelve year olds. It also wasn't one creature taking a group out one at a time. It was a creature CHOOSING to take them out one at a time. It could have been a ten minute movie... Blaine could have said his best line ever (gotta keep that dialogue in there no matter when) then they drop out of the chopper, run around in the dirt and leaves for ten minutes, then all get one solid blast of laser to the head or heart, with a few of them getting the wicked claws of death. But no! Not this movie. They decided "Hey! Humans like to toy with things, play mind games even when they're not necessary! What's to stop an alien from doing the exact same thing!" En Garde, all of the "Alien" and "Aliens" fanatics...I love those films also, but these are my reasons for this film receiving preferantial treatment.
The infrared was pretty awesome. The Predator mask looked cool. But, above all else except Blaine's line, the two key factors in this movie was DREADLOCKS. You gotta love an alien with dreadlocks. How many times in this movie did it become infinitely cooler when his swooping and loping was augmented by dreadlocks. The other key factor? Billy's laugh. A loud powerful laugh that lets you know someone truly thought something was funny.
Plus, how many times do you see something bigger than Arnold, and how many times do you see Arnold get the doodoo kicked out of him?

This movie gets two thumbs up, four stars, 10 out of 10, and if you watch it, you too can become a sexual tyrannosaurus, just like me. And Blaine. And Elipidia Carillo.