Its a big dumb film that is too light on the fun to make it enjoyable.

Rating: 5/10 (24 September 2015)

John McTiernan's 107 minute salute to muscles is a huge cheesy mad monster movie. Everything you need to know about this movie is summed up in a hand clasp between Schwarzenegger and Carl Weathers, biceps bulging and glistening with moisture.
Schwarzenegger's team of covert soldiers (most of whom have bodybuilders physique) are dropped into a mission to rescue hostages. They do so by conspicuously blowing up every single building in the village. Imagine my surprise when the hostage turns up dead. Then maybe there's some CIA ulterior motives. They go into it, but they don't. A couple of hostile "I used to trust yous" are shouted. I don't consider these spoilers because they aren't - this is just the reason for having the team in the jungle so the Predator can attack.
The Predator lacks the cool intimidation of the Terminator or the panic inducing presence of the Alien. He looks kind of like a Native American tribal leader mated with Darth Vader. The visuals are fairly dated too, especially plasma blasts. Throughout the film, the cast of Kings of Iron battles the unseen Predator, including one incredible sequence where the entire team hurles a tsunami of lead at the jungle without even stopping to ask what Mac is shooting at. The action sequences are OK, but nothing is particularly memorable. The cheesy dialogue offers a bunch of pearls that is the biggest asset of the film: - "Stick around" - "Get to the chopper!" - "This stuff will make you a god damned sexual Tyrannosaurus, just like me - " I ain't got time to bleed!"
Did I mention that this is a salute to the male form? Boy is it. Schwarzenegger and co seem to strip down faster than the cast of Magic Mike. A couple of deliberately constructed scenes focus on Weather's rippling six pack or Schwarzenegger's huge arms.
There wasn't anything particularly dull or insulting about Predator, but its a big dumb film that is too light on the fun to make it enjoyable.