Vin who?

Rating: Null/10 (13 July 2003)

Yay, the first film that launched Vin Diesel into the series of seemingly never-ending roles where he plays bad-ass con after bad-ass con to just plain bad-ass (minus the con). I don't know if I just can't buy into Vin Diesel being some tough guy or if I'm just sick of seeing that type on the screen. This setup reminds me John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mars  people on planet and need to escape before something comes and kills them. In Carpenter's film you have possessed people who look like zombies, in this we have imitation aliens who thrive on darkness. At least Carpenter had the sense to incorporate a degree of humorous corniness and sappiness (even if it didn't go over well with audiences.)
But apparently the masses favor big-bad Mr. Ex con who no one screws with who somehow always has the upper hand regardless of the situation. I would've been at the edge of my seat hoping that the studio would have it in them to kill off this character, but then I remembered studios don't care about good plot turns and developments and only care about marketability and sequel possibilities which translates to formulas which translates to all the wrong people dying in uninteresting ways at predictable points in the film . . . or in plain English, the studio didn't have the balls to kill off that character.
And teaming the big-bad convict with an all but helpless crew who cannot survive a day without him  been there, done that, bored me then too. Why have a movie with other characters when none of them truly add anything more than a minor annoyance and act as a little obstacle from time to time? If they're going to make a film to play to Diesel's ego why not make it Diesel versus the Pitch Black monsters?
The only surprise in the film involves a laughable standoff between Vin and the creatures; why this seemingly super-human courage' and ability is deemed cool, I'll never know. But I couldn't suspend my disbelief enough to see it come out as anything but the Riddick character meeting a painful death and cries and screams just as loud as every other `lesser' character on the crew.
Hitchcock is quoted as saying `A bomb is under the table and it goes off - that's surprise. A bomb is under the table and it doesn't go off - that's suspense.' Pitch Black has neither suspense nor surprise, just obligatory and formula-drive scenarios shot in a generic manner with an altered perception every now and again in an attempt to keep its audience awake. That said, there's no reason to see Pitch Black other than to see this cast of people perform the standard space-thriller drill. Not being a fan of Diesel, I can't say I enjoyed Pitch Black.