Movie Makers....Take a Clue from the Pirates!

Rating: 10/10 (20 July 2003)

All movies should be this much fun to go see. With most of the junk Hollywood produces now, I hate to spend $20+ for two tickets, 1 medium popcorn and a bottle of water, so that my kid and I can waste 90 minutes of our life, and come out thinking, "well that movie was OK...." I watch tons of movies, but generally wait till they're on DVD so I only blow $4 at Blockbuster if it sucks.
HOWEVER, cheapskate that I can be, POTC was worth every penny!!! Even though some people here might think it was too long because Hollywood's getting us trained with the 80-90 minute flicks so they can cram in more showings at the theater, I loved every second of it. I'm 40 and my daughter's 11 and we both had a blast. And what's odd is that neither of us is particularly into "pirate" movies. It's just so much fun to watch, it's appropriate it was based on a Disney ride, because that's exactly what it is, a 2 1/2 hour long movie ride that lets you escape from reality into a wonderful fantasyland.
They couldn't have picked a better cast for this picture. Johnny, Keira, and Orlando were perfect in their roles. Keira reminds me of a cross between Brooke Shields and Jennifer Garner. She's pretty without being too perfect, but portrays the damsel in distress that can swing a plank of wood like McGwire if need be. Orlando is a great romantic anti-hero/love interest for Keira's character. And as a dirty, natty-braided, gold-toothed, and, you assume, smelly pirate, Johnny Depp was as sexy a swashbuckler as you'll ever see on film (and MINOR SPOILER...) he doesn't even do anything resembling a love scene! Any female that doesn't want to jump his bones after seeing one of his side-ways glances needs to get her hormones checked!
Filmmakers who are wondering why their movies don't make money at the box office need to take a long hard look at this one and learn some lessons.
A) If we want to see serious issues or be depressed, we can turn on CNN.

B) Movies don't have to be crammed full of blood, gore, profanity, or nudity to be a smash hit. You'll make more money when parents can take kids to a show without being embarassed or horrified every 30 seconds.
C) When we go to a movie, we know the people on the screen are acting, and the actors know we know they are acting, so let your actors have fun with this, and subtly wink at the audience every now and then. It doesn't hurt and we viewers love it!
D) Don't underestimate the intelligence of the movie-going public, even the kids. Movies can be hysterically funny with well-written, well-timed lines without resorting to stupid slapstick, pie-in-the face, or toilet-themed humor.
My kudos to the creators of POTC. They did everything right, and I predict they'll sell a fortune of DVD's when this comes out at the stores. I know I'll be buying it the first day. This is a movie I'll want to watch many times over.