Cutthroat Island 2

Rating: 4/10 (20 May 2011)

Thar be a treasure in store for Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, and it be the Golden Raspberry.
After four entries, Sadly Pirates has lost its soul. This film may as well be marketed as Cutthroat Island 2. This is not THE Pirates of the Caribbean, it's just a pirate movie with no magic or charm. Convoluted as the second and third entries were, at least they had a sense of adventure, journey and spectacle. On Stranger Tides has none of the above. It is a scrappy walk in the park of a story, with bad plotting, poor cinematography, lazy acting, and it's over with so fast that it all feels pointless. In fact, I'd say it comes close to a rip-off.
It is bad enough that there is no life to anyone in the supporting cast, but with Jack Sparrow, it is unacceptable. He's lost his persona and his zing completely, and his box of mannerisms alone does not make him a chartacter. I was also disappointed with Ian McShane. Having turned in what may be the best dramatic performance in television (Deadwood) It hurts a little to see how useless his portrayal of Blackbeard is. In fairness, he wasn't given a whole lot to work with.
More than the actors, I blame the script. The once talented duo of screenwriters Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio haven't even bothered to write anyone a part for this movie. Not only that but the dialogue is sloppy, full of needless exposition which doesn't end up explaining much.
Even as a source of mindless thrills and chills, On Stranger Tides is weak. The only time when it comes close to matching the scale of its predecessors is in one scene, which sets pirates against killer mermaids. I remember thinking to myself during that sequence, how much Disney has changed in twenty years. It would have been nice to see the cast of the Little Mermaid show up to do a song number, and considering Rob Marshall's skill with music, it might have helped the movie.
He is clearly in no position to direct this movie. He too is unable to bring much to the film, and I have a feeling he doesn't know what he's doing with 3-D photography either. Even in regular 2D, the film is quite dark, and grotesque. 3-D would be unwatchable I figure.
The movie ends in the style of setting up for another entry, which I now have little faith in. Pirates of the Caribbean, has become little more than an amateurish cash-grab.