These Guys Are Beating A Dead Pirate.

Rating: 5/10 (4 September 2014)

I'm probably not the only one that groaned upon hearing that they were making a new "Pirates" movie (And more are planning to come), but is this one worth the watch? We'll begin with the definitive answer, No. I enjoyed a few moments where the movie excelled and as the series progressed, they had become more focused in tying loose ends and focusing on performances. However, this film continues to deliberately set up more impossible scenarios, and the slapstick levels of the previous entries is jacked up significantly this time around.
Johnny Depp is reportedly getting tired of the Jack Sparrow character, and in a way so am I. He has only gotten worse since the second movie, and the star who shines the most now is Geoffrey Rush. When he plays eccentric, he delivers way beyond expectations. The newer cast members are somewhat the least likable. Gone are Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley, in come Penelope Cruz (Well-casted enough) and Ian Mcshane as a terrific rendition of Blackbeard, yet they do nothing with the character. Forgive me when I say I don't know their names, but the actor and actress whose spontaneous romance as a priest and mermaid was so damn cringe worthy it felt like I jumped into "Twilight" (2008).
Well there's a quest for the fabled "Fountain of Youth". However, in order for the magic to work they must succeed in having two people drink from two identical magical chalices, whilst also acquiring a mermaids tear. If successful, one will inherited all the other persons previous and remaining years (Those are some pretty challenging guidelines). I never remembered any of this when hearing any fables of the Fountain, but that's a lot of tasks. Luckily our heroes will have a lot to do, yet all we must do to succeed is watch two hours of this tedious bore.
Okay, I understand sarcasm is finding its way into my review, but honestly when writing all that down wouldn't yours also? Anyone who has seen this must have felt gob smacked and in the wrong way. But for the bad things I've said, there are some good scenes and fun to be had. After putting up with a load of coral reef monsters in the previous instalments, it's good to at least know they calmed down on all that. There are a lot of scenes that really blew me away such as the chase scene through London, and when the characters finally get to where their going, the stylistic look of this movie gets a thumbs up from me.
Final Verdict: Good enough, but didn't really add anything new either. The 3-D sucks and this franchise just has to finish now, but as we know, it won't happen that easily. 5/10.