Yo ho, ho-hum

Rating: 6/10 (21 May 2011)

The film begins in Spain. Two of the Spanish king's men discover someone who has seen Ponce De Leon's ship. Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) and his First Mate Gibbs (Kevin McNally) escaping the gallows. Along the way, Jack learns that someone is impersonating him to recruit a crew. They also run into Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush), whom has sold out and now works for King George (Richard Griffiths). Barbossa lost the Black Pearl ship in a prior battle, and also lost his right leg. Soon, it becomes clear that Sparrow, King George, and the Spaniards all seek the Fountain of Youth, but for different reasons.
Sparrow later finds out that it was Angelica (Penelope Cruz), a former flame, that was impersonating him. Later, its revealed that she is the First Mate of a ship captained by Blackbeard (Ian McShane). Blackbeard also happens to be Angelica's father, and he too seeks the fountain of youth.
So lets tally it up. Jack Sparrow, Barbossa, King George, The Spanish, Angelica, and Blackbeard all seek the Fountain of Youth. Did you get all of that? Along the way, we meet some zombies, a clergyman named Philip (Sam Claflin), and a mermaid named Syrena (Astrid Berges-Frisbey).
My feelings about this film are all over the place. I saw it in 3D, and I strongly advise against that. Save for one scene with large leaves, there was nothing to justify the 3D surcharge. See it in 2D if you can. While I like Rob Marshall as a director (his previous work includes Chicago and Nine, the latter also starred Penelope Cruz), Gore Verbinski is missed. The mermaids were a nice touch, I thought they were done well. That Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom did not return this time neither helped nor hurt the film. Though it seems strange that neither character gets so much as a mention, as if they never existed. Penelope Cruz is a welcome addition to the cast, as is Ian McShane. The movie just seemed to be lacking in spirit.
On Stranger Tides is a decent way to spend two and a half hours, but the series is showing its age (and not just on Barbossa's sandpapered face!). This is definitely the weakest installment in the Pirates franchise. I can see why Johnny Depp wants to space time in-between sequels. But then again, maybe this is a good stopping point. I'm not sure there is any meaningful story left to tell. Three stars out of five. See it in a matinée, and in 2D.
EDIT: I completely forgot that this is the second pairing of Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruz. They previously starred together in 2001's Blow.
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