Lost at Sea

Rating: 5/10 (28 May 2011)

There's nothing really wrong with the latest Pirates film, but it still fails to gather any real steam. Here's why:
Characters: The real disappointment here is Blackbeard. Apparently he captured the Black Pearl, but we never see that. Apparently he's a notorious pirate and is feared, but we never see that either. The first three films all had good antagonists. We saw Barbossa and his men in action. We saw Davy Jones and how he'd become corrupted. We saw the East India trading company and it's ruthless ways. We never see anything of Blackbeard. That alone almost ruins the film.
Keira Knightly and Orlando Bloom also do not return for the fourth installment, which sucks mightily. It's not the same without them.
Plot: Why is Jack Sparrow on another adventure? He has no real motive here. There's some weak attempt to do so with someone impersonating him, which makes no sense at all, but the premise is flawed. Without a real reason, well, there's no reason.
UPDATE: I noticed that I missed the reason Jack is apparently on this quest: Penelope Cruz and whether or not he loves her. Well, that's not a particularly good reason, and certainly not a compelling one.
SFX: okay, nothing amazing like the first three films.
The real reason: why this film sucks a bit? The script/story is weak. The basic idea is okay - the continuing adventures of Jack Sparrow and what not - but the story is poorly told. As I said, there's no reason for Jack to go on this adventure. He's really just along for the ride, and it ruins the film. Blackbeard's reason is okay, but not particularly good. The other characters largely don't matter in this regard.
So, to summarise, the main problem is that while it's okay, it's really just a poorly written, tacked-on new film. All the basic ingredients are there, but it fails to make an impression. Not bad, but average.
5 out of 10.