I'm Sailing with Jack Until the End

Rating: 6/10 (31 May 2017)

Odysseys evolve with every chapter. The hero grows while the scenery passes by. Then there are the disasters, with each subsequent episode so disappointing that it begs the question why we enjoyed the ride to begin with. Finally there are the cruises like Pirates of the Caribbean. Dead Men Tell No Tales is neither a return to former glory nor a promise of greatness to come, but it is enough so a fan might reminisce with a smile on their face.
I am sticking with this voyage till the end.
Pirates 5 offers no compelling new characters and a clunky plot, but has the franchise defining Jack based laughs and the absurd action sequences. Unlike its predecessor, this film is not instantly forgettable. Henry Turner (Thwaites) son of Will Turner and Elizabeth Swan, takes center stage in this installment. He is in pursuit of Poseidon's Trident, a panacea with the power to release his father from the curse of the Flying Dutchman. Hearing myths, Turner seeks the Jack Sparrow (Depp) to aid in his quest. Also enlisting in the crew is scientist Carina (Scodelario), who also seeks the trident as a clue to her lost heritage. This expedition is endangered by a cursed Spanish crew lead by Captain Salazar (Bardem) Jack's eternal enemy and greatest fear.
In Curse of the Black Pearl, there was a one golden medallion and a cursed pirate fleet. In Dead Man's Chest, there was a key, a disembodied heart, a cursed pirate fleet, and the British Empire. Now included, but not limited to, in Dead Men Tell No Tales are: a trident, a diary, a ruby, a blood moon, the compass with more rules, the Black Pearl in a bottle, Blackbeard's sword, an accused witch, an actual witch, two curses, two Turners, Jack's crew, captain Barbosa, his armada, undead Spanish pirate hunters, the British empire, and a man wearing pearls with an unattractive sister. We have lost the way. I am pretty lenient on sequels with uninteresting plots, but this is convoluted enough to interfere with the good stuff. I would say the script needs a rewrite, but I am willing to bet that's what got us here to begin with. Lone highlight is a wonderful flashback revealing Jack's backstory, an island of concise and gap filling storytelling in a sea of bafflement. The plot is a mess, but we are not here for the plot.
Unfortunately, we are here for character and these new additions just add to the boring bewilderment. I like the return to naivety in Turner contrasting with Jack's cleverness, but there is no for him chance to shine. More remarkable is Carina, who compared with original Elizabeth seems more intelligent yet out of her league. Still, she feels more like a device to advance the plot then a thinking, breathing, human. Fortunately, one woman's loss is probably a certain pirate's gain.
Depp's Captain Jack Sparrow feels like a living legend of a lost lineage. Part of a tradition spanning from Buster Keaton to Robin Williams. Cinematic comics in constant motion. Performance are more than just a pile of witty lines, but how the actor moves with them. There is more humor in Sparrow's literal hands than half of contemporary comedies. No, Depp is not as sharp or original as he was a decade ago, here he is constantly in a drunk stupor which is a typical act anyone can pull. Still, if Jack is your reason for buying a ticket you are getting a good chuckle to dollar exchange. Thank the return of the completely implausible set pieces that Pirates has mastered over the years. This film is competing another franchise, but here there is a scene with Jack bound to a guillotine that got a laugh from the audience twice as large as anything I have heard in Guardians. The musical theme is still unforgettable, and the sense of exhilaration when it plays remains. Unfortunately most of the magic is spent in the first act, replaced by impressive CGI sea battles with ghost pirates that I have kinda become used to. Pirates is too uneven and overploted to be great or even very good, but the heartbeat endures. Dead Men Tell No Tales is enough for fans to recall the wonder and maybe even return for another sequel.