The moviest movie of 2017 (so far)

Rating: 2/10 (26 May 2017)

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales stars Johnny Depp, Javier Bardem and Geoffrey Rush, and it tells the story of how Jack needs to find the trident of Poseidon. I watched the first pirates movie in preparation for this, and I thought it was average. Not my type of movie, but I enjoyed some parts of it. In this movie, I enjoyed little to nothing. The direction is non-existent, it does not have any type of vision or creativity at all. The script is atrocious, with no character development whatsoever and with the most obvious, painfully, cheap jokes any kids movie would have. The comedy is really bad, it really did distract me how much un-laughable jokes there were throughout the movie, and how much they tried to appeal to the mainstream audience. The main villain is laughable, and I do not think that Javier Bardem should've played him, he is too good for this movie. The main motivation for the villain is very stereotypical, I have seen the same motivation many times. The exposition throughout the movie is unnecessary and apathetic, very cliché as well. The action sequences are average, nothing special there. There was very little practical effects in the movie, with a lot of green screen and CGI. There are some logical inconsistencies that really took me out of the movie, as the movie doesn't care about small details. There are some minor positives. The acting is not bad but not great, I think the actors are giving everything they got, but the sad thing is that the characters are underwritten and just plain boring. The cinematography is good, with a lot of unique and interesting camera movements in the beginning of the movie. The ending really did not satisfy me as much as I wanted, since I just wanted to have fun with this movie. I don't think this movie is a mess, its just incredibly boring with nothing driving the characters to the story. This movie needed to have more self awareness and maybe I would've liked it. 2.5/10