Not Salaza's revenge, Dead men tell no tale but who cares.

Rating: 5/10 (30 May 2017)

revenge, Dead men tell no tale but who cares.
Yet again the Pirates set sale on what seems to be the last adventure, but unfortunately not. After the weak adventure of On Stranger Tides, directors: Joachim RÃ¸nning and Espen Sandberg are Captain of the ship in another poor excuse for a sequel.
Set 9 or 12 years after the events of At worlds End, Will Turner's son, Henry (Brenton Thwaites) pursues Jack Sparrow to help him find the Trident of Poseidon to help free his father's curse, but is ambushed by dead man Armando Salazar (Javier Bardem) to deliver his message of vengeance to Sparrow. This leads to a clash of characters being terrorised by the dead, and all in hopeful search of this Trident.
Although the Pirates series has never been perfect, I have always found satisfactory enjoyment in the first three, but now I have lost patients. What you have the same reused material and structure again, but really exhausted to the point of apathy. From the very beginning I immediate had no excitement or enthusiasm and just didn't really care at all. Although the main narrative thread is hat they are searching for this magic artefact, (as usual) there is also much else going on, in underdeveloped mini stories just leading nowhere, or nowhere important.
You still do have the same swashbuckling action, turned up to a ridiculous degree, moving banks, to zombie sharks, which may still be kind of fun but just too ridiculous, and wasn't enough to keep the woman sitting next to me awake, or the person in front off their phone.
What the entire film really relies on is Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) who has rightly so by other critics become a routine, but just a very annoying routine. I know the whole point of Sparrow is to e a bumbling fool, but from the beginning the character is just drunk, and stays like that for the rest of the film. It feels like a fan's very oversold impression of Sparrow, and Depp is just there to do his thing.
What I was hoping to save the film, was Barden's performance as the villain, which he appears to be the only one actually in his character and very intimidating, but is sadly not enough to save the film.
We also have the knew Keira and Orlando replacements played by Thwaites and Kaya Scodelario, both just walking plot devises helping to move the story on in no direction. Combined with their weak acting talent and the appalling script, the entire experience is just aggravating. There is even a small theme that is meant to comment on the historical social ideas at the time, which I personally fund to be quite offensive, but I don't know to what degree that it is accurate.
Which leads on to the jokes, which by some miracle amused the audience I was with, but did not impress me, besides its humour we surely must all have seen in any other family comedy, but just became another reason to get frustrated.
So in the end there is nothing really to like in Pirates 5, it may entertain a younger audience, but I completely lost patients with it. Its not terrible, but just nothing really good happens. 5.5/10