Its worst offence: it's never really entertaining.

Rating: 5/10 (13 May 2018)

'Pirates Of The Caribbean: Salazar's Revenge (2017)' is the latest in its financially viable yet creatively strained swashbuckling series, hitting the UK with a baffling alternate title (who on earth is Salazar?). The thing is disappointing, for sure; it's a huge step down for the franchise, which has been consistently good since its inception. The problems mostly come from the writing, as the visuals are typically on point. We're fed the same basic story we've been getting for the past four films, stripped down to its apparent essentials but lacking in its charm. Depp seems like he's done caring, coming across as a parody of what he once was (which was, essentially, itself a parody). He unenthusiastically stumbles about almost as if really drunk, while Bardem - in potentially his worst performance - chews the scenery like an untrained puppy. The hokey, near parodic plot pushes through its intangible, CGI-fuelled action sequences as if it can't wait to be over. It all feels somewhat inconsequential, even if it attempts to tie back into the 'original trilogy'. Of course, the thing does have its moments. Some of its action is decent and Rush's Barbossa is as good as ever. In the end, though, it's just mediocre. Its worst offence is that it's never really entertaining. How many times will this series emerge from Davy Jones' locker? 5/10