Curiously flat

Rating: 5/10 (7 July 2006)

Sadly, this movie does not succeed. It's big, there's plenty of spectacle, and lots of deep sea beasties, but it all feels flat. The closing moments bring a great surprise and give the movie a needed shot of adrenaline. One of the biggest flaws is that the movie takes little time to develop characters or recap some key plot points from the movie released three years ago. It jumps right in to the story and makes many references to much of the mystical mumbo jumbo from the first film. Before we know it, all the characters are off on another quest for more mystical mumbo jumbo all of which hinges on the mumbo jumbo from the first film. I quickly got really lost. I'd explain the plot, but it's really a secondary concern. Just know that Capt. Jack Sparrow, Will and Elizabeth all set out to sea tracking down mystical trinkets.
I was tired when I saw the movie so my comprehension was diminished, but I think if you are fully alert when you see this, you will still be hard pressed afterward to comprehend all that you have seen. This movie pays less attention to letting the audience participate in the story and more with distracting them. It's film-making sleight of hand. Jerry Bruckheimer, who produced the atrocity "Armageddon," produced this as well and it suffers from the typical Bruckheimer problem of spectacle over storytelling. It's also 2 1/2 hours which the movie can't adequately carry.
There are some amazing action moments in the movie, but they can't buoy this unwieldy spectacle. If you're like me, you're gonna go see this just for the pure summer spectacle of it, but be warned that it is executed far less adroitly than many of the summer escapes that we have already witnessed. Go see "Poseidon" or "MI:3." They're quick, slick, and easy to follow. Even better, go see the superb action film "District B13."
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