There's no shortage of pirates, that's for sure

Rating: 6/10 (24 July 2006)

Let me start by saying that I really loved the first "Pirates", and watched it 3 times. I was looking forward to this sequel. It proved to be an adequate sequel in that it connected the first movie to a (yet unreleased) third, but that is about all. Don't get me wrong: I liked many things about this movie: the special effects were great, the diversity of the pirates was enhanced (I particularly liked the hammerhead guy), and the line between good and evil was blurred, which is a good thing in a pirate movie.
The main shortcoming of this movie is that it has only two talented actors: Johnny Depp and Bill Nighy (Davey Jones). The rest give a bland, forgettable performance that does not even rise to the level of a caricature. Bloom and Knightley seem to have the chemistry of Bill and Hillary Clinton: during the fighting scene she doesn't seem to care her fiancé is in danger and doesn't come to his aid. It's each one for himself in this movie, be they engaged to be married, good friends or longtime shipmates. There is no camaraderie, there is no love, and there is no loyalty.
The fighting scenes are good at times, silly at others (the watermill wheel sequence is a good example), and the plot line is very thin indeed. I got to hand it to the director, though: no one has ever had more pirates featured in a pirate movie: with the exception of a few British soldiers and some cannibals, every one in this movie is a pirate. Even those who didn't start out as pirates become so before the end credits role. Oddly enough none of them are ever seen robbing merchant ships or innocent civilians, but occupy all of their time pursuing hidden treasure chests and Jamaican-accented witches who know how to find them.
But overall, I can't say I felt like asking for my money back. It was good entertainment for $9, and I will give the third installment a try. Who knows? They might introduce non-pirate characters and have Jack Sparrow and the Kraken live happily ever after (there must be SOME chemistry, Verbinski!).