HUGE Mistake

Rating: 2/10 (8 July 2006)

I, like many fans of the original film, had anticipated this feature for three years, since the picture was first announced. Standing in line for an hour, I was the first in my area to receive tickets to the midnight preview of the show. The theater was filled with devoted fans in costume. My, how we have been disappointed. The producers of the film, apparently only wanting to rake in the cash, have created a plot less, listless, carbon copy of the original film, which might have been a classic had it not been overshadowed by this certain failure. Pointless adventures, overblown special effects, and forced humor are rampant in the film. Worst of all, irritated fans who have waited two and a half hours for the film's conclusion must now wait another year before the many cliff hangers will be resolved. Jack Sparrow, originally a witty and lovable pirate, has become a villainous, sex-crazed scallywag with no perceivable humor. Depp cannot be blamed; it seems the script was cranked out of a Pirates of the Caribbean factory, where identical plots are slightly masked by new (and less intriguing) characters. All I can say is: perhaps Barbossa can save number three. He seems to be the only fun character left, as the others have been drained of any entertaining or honorable qualities (this doesn't includes Will's now-dull romantic dramas). And, finally, where have all these random histories come from? And what is the purpose of so many strange ancient civilizations? So many plot lines will shoot out of nowhere and go nowhere from thence, it is truly mind-boggling. Writers, I for one am sorely disappointed, and rather angry. In earnest, I feel that we devoted fans are owed an apology.