Pointless Sequel

Rating: 3/10 (8 July 2006)

I knew this film could not possibly live up to the original, but I enjoyed the first Pirates of the Caribbean so much I thought this one would at least hold my attention. Sadly, I wasted two hours and six dollars on this pointless excursion into the realm of idiocy.
In The Curse of The Black Pearl, a touch of the supernatural was cleverly and naturally woven into the plot in the form of the Aztec curse that turned the crew of the Black Pearl into living skeletons by the light of the moon. That made sense; we believed it and its presentation--after being discussed, hinted at and skeptically dismissed as impossible by some of the characters--was a shocking and creepy payoff. In the sequel however, right form the start we are supposed to accept all manner of zombies, slimy undead monsters, sea dragons...I don't remember what else because it was all forgettable. Is this Harry Potter? Have Captain Jack and Co been transported via the Hogwarts Express to a magic world? In the first film these characters scoffed at ancient curses, now they are positively overloaded with fantastic legends and no one bats an eye??? Yo-ho-ho indeed.
This film also regrettably suffers from the insidious disease of senselessly regurgitating dialogue that was cleverly used in the previous film. The second time around it just reeks of a desperate attempt to recapture the success of the original. I suppose the audience is expected to be delighted by the sheer familiarity of hearing the old lines. I wasn't. Silly me, I was actually expecting NEW clever lines instead of the same ones.
I could go on, but basically if you're the type who would enjoy watching Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom grocery shopping or filing their income taxes, you should see this film. Otherwise, don't bother. I like watching them too, but there's a limit to what I can tolerate. Dead Man's Chest goes way beyond that limit. I think it was essentially an excuse for the cast and crew to get a tan in the Caribbean and waste some money on grand effects. The only positive comment I have is that it looks as though it was fun to film. But not to watch.