Where are the Pirates of Yesteryear?

Rating: 1/10 (11 July 2006)

went to see pirates today and realized i've been misspelling Caribbean all my life. who cares. have you seen it yet? BOMB. ugh. NOT GOOD. for a 3 hour movie, capt. jack is in it for about 45 minutes all told and then is just a shadow of his former glory. convoluted, cluttered plot line, too many minor characters, too much emphasis on gags that aren't that funny and have nothing to do with the plot, although with that plot, you could throw in north Korea and global warming without too much trouble. ugh. i was SO disappointed. there i was, settled in with my popcorn and diet coke, not too many people there, ready for a 3 hour johnny depp-with-long-hair-and-eyeliner fantasy and wham! 5 minutes into it, i knew we were in deep doodoo. well, enough about that. i guess we wait for #3 which actually has a long lost friend in it. this one could have had the Mormon tabernacle choir in it, and no one would have noticed. in fact, they may have been in the Tortuga scene.