Impossible to follow

Rating: 4/10 (5 December 2007)

*Big spoilers in this review.*
Now I watched this last night, so I might be forgetting a few things. The movie starts off with a long line of people waiting to get hanged, and repeated pulls of "the lever" to hang people. After about three pulls, a little boy is to be hung, and before he hangs, he starts to sing this song which we find out later, I guess, forced these great pirates, nine of them, to meet, "The song has been sung," Barbossa says to another pirate lord. Cheery, start.
Here are some, not all, of the plot lines in the movie:
The stabber of Davey Jones' heart must take his place as Captain.
We find out that Tia is some super lady named Calypso with some sort of powers, and she brought Barbossa back to life so that he can assemble the 9 pirate lords to free her. Barbossa plans to use her to save them against Beckett and his armada.
Tia is the one that Davey Jones loves, and she loves him.
Davey Jones was suppose to be ferrying souls that died at sea to somewhere, then once every 10 years he gets to go ashore.
The reason Davey Jones was so mean is because Calypso didn't meet him after 10 years, and the reason why he won't ferry souls back and forth, and the reason why everyone is turning into sea critters.
After being dead, Jack schemes the whole movie to stab the heart so that he can sail forever.
Will and Elizabeth play hatesies throughout most of the movie so that you can wonder if they will ever get together. Then miraculously Will proposes in the last battle, and Barbossa marries them in the middle of that battle, which is just in time for Will to take a fatal stab in the heart.
People come back to life right and left, yet Will getting stabbed is somehow permanent. Shows how bad a movie is when you don't think that a main character getting killed is serious. "Oh that's not serious, they can just resurrect him."
Calypso (Tia) with all her awesome power gets freed, and right afterwards Will tells her that it was Davey that got her locked away in human form all these years. Supposedly, she has a deep love for Davey as well, yet after being freed, she never talks to Davey, sees him, confronts him with this new information, or anything, but create a big whirlpool with the Black Pearl and the Flying Dutchman in it. That's it. They spend all that effort and time in the movie, and that's all she does, turns into a crabs and makes a whirlpool, LOL.
Every single main character (Asain pirate, Barbossa, Tia, Davey Jones, Beckett, Jack, Elizabeth, and Will) has their own backstab plan, and a side plan to go with that, and they intermingle with about half of the others. It's literally impossible to keep them all straight. So right before the end, the combatants come ashore to talk with one another for some reason, the outcome of the parlay is to trade Jack for Will, and I was like what the heck was that all about? Davey Jones's locker looks a lot like the Utah salt flats with an ocean in the unseen distance.
You get to Jones' locker by sailing to Antarctica, off the edge of the world, and down a waterfall which will wash you ashore next to the desert next to the Utah salt flats.
So at the end we are treated to Will and Elizabeth being in the same position that Davey and Calypso were in. So they can meet once every 10 years, and we, the viewing audience, knows that it will work out since they have such a strong love. But wait a second, Will is dead, and supposedly will not age. Elizabeth will age normally, and is expected to meet him once every 10 years. What kind of relationship is that, and who would expect someone to wait 10 years for them. Why not have Will pull a Davey Jones and bring her into the crew.
The ending was as convoluted as the movie.