"It's just good business."

Rating: 8/10 (3 June 2007)

Another big dumb movie from Hollywood! But like the other two films in this series, it sure is a lot of fun. These Pirates movies are the closest thing to kids movies The Hound will subject himself to in a theater. And indeed there is something prophetic about that final line that Lord Beckett keeps repeating as his ship is blown to bits around him. These films are all about $$$$$$$, but as long as they entertain, is that such a terrible thing? Though this film is currently under performing in terms of meeting its financial expectations, one wonders if there will in fact be another one in the future. And just which of these cast members will sign on for another voyage?
The plot by now has wound itself around in knots more complex than any sailor has ever tied. The early parts of this film deal with the cast members trying to rescue Capt. Jack Sparrow from his virtual prison in Davey Jones's Locker. Once this feat is accomplished, (of course it would be!) the ultimate aim seems to be for all pirates left on Earth to band together to defeat Davey Jones and the East India Trading Company. It looks like there will be an epic battle staged with hundreds of ships, however the final battle seems to consist of only the Black Pearl battling the Flying Dutchman. Each cast member seems to switch alliances with every other cast member at least twice before this 2 hour and 48 minute film finally comes to an end. Muskets are fired, swords are thrust, goddesses are captured then released, destinies are fulfilled, and about 1,000 blue-coated East India Trading Company members are killed.
The film has some funny moments, but neither sequel had as many as part one in terms of laughs. Maybe the funniest thing I saw in part 3 was Davey Jones standing in a rotten old tub of water on a tiny island since he cannot touch dry land but once every ten years. With so many little rules and alliances, I'd hate to have to be a script supervisor on a set like this! How do they keep track of all these things?? Was it great cinema? Well... no, but I got what I paid for. By now most people know what these films are all about, and I really can't see how someone who liked parts 1 or 2 would not enjoy this one. What better way could I have spent $6.50 on a rainy Friday afternoon? 8 of 10 stars.
The Hound.