It's already been said but I'll say it again...awful don't even rent!

Rating: 1/10 (9 July 2007)

This movie was awful. It seems that the golden age of sequels has been tarnished lately like the new Star Dorks and Matrix. There are a few exceptions of course (LOTR), but with Pirates 3 I wasn't expecting much but no matter how much money you throw on crap, it is still crap: Plot - It was confusing because there were too many subplots. By the end I didn't care who lived or died (maybe they should have waited until they did a second draft before they started filming. The audience wanted Jack to be happy (maybe the writers should have made him captain of the Flying Dutchman?) Children getting hung on the gallows at the beginning? The explanation wasn't enough to warrant a scene. Why do we need to have the dog come back. Wasn't he on Cannibal Island? Let me guess he managed to escape from the cannibals and swim hundreds to thousands of miles. Enough with Jack the the undead monkey! CGI - I'm a little old school when it comes to CGI. I think there is too much of it in the cinema and most of the CGI in this film was useless. I don't mind what was put in the first 2, but what's with Calypso turning into the fifty-foot woman who then transforms into a ton of crabs? Oooh CGI neat! We have ships going down the vortex shooting cannons at each other while an armada of pirates and British vessels wait while a few ships duke it out? I guess they CGI geeks spent so much time on the tidy bowl battle that they forgot that they could have a full naval battle. Also, the lead ship for East India Trading Co./British Navy goes down so the pirates win and the rest of you can go home. That should have insulted everyone in the UK. The British ruled their empire with their navy.
Too Long - Actually this one was 168 minutes too long.
Don't waste your money like we did and watch this drivel. It'll be on TV in a few months and hopefully they'll condense it for time.