grotesque

Rating: 1/10 (9 June 2007)

After the end credits of POTC3 which last fifteen minutes, one's head is spinning. How could thousands of people who contributed to this idiotic movie believe it had anything going for it? The problem here is the problem of life: meaning. Virtually any movie that makes even a token stab at meaning is better than this, which doesn't even try. Each meaningless, arbitrary development arrives and is dispensed with without ever engaging a viewer. Your eyes are occupied by the shrill visuals, but none of it reaches your brain. About ten myth extensions show up the very second they're needed to get the characters to another special effects sequence, which is dependably more overdeveloped, tedious and moronic than the last. It's all pointless and loud. Ultimately the myth in the movie has no internal logic whatsoever. Because the plot arrives only as needed, up until the ending, a viewer has no hope of figuring out if the movie has two big sequences left or twelve. All this and a villain who's a total femmy wussbag.
I lost interest in deciphering the stupid plot at about the 20 minute mark, and I was numb loooong before it ended. Any of Sparrow's charm or Depps talent from the 1st film is now completely squeezed off the screen. A whirlpool sequence goes on for twenty five minutes until any semblance of a threat has been neutered. That goes for every sequence. Here's how you can write POTC4: Add another rule to the myth, crank the volume & blow some sh*t up. The movie is also a study of bad skin.
The duo who are supposed to be the comic relief are some sort of weak, corny writing I haven't seen since the 70s. It's family-oriented crap like you might see in Pete's Dragon.
The first movie was a comedy, a pirate movie and a romance BUT became a blockbuster. The next two went straight for blockbuster, and just became crap. Noisy. Insipid. incoherent. shrill. exhausting. bloated. charmless. laughless. overproduced. overdeveloped; the same hideous qualities that we refused to watch in musicals from the 60s & 70s. How did we get to a place where we think this is entertaining instead of stupid and obnoxious? ...Oh that's right, Star Wars killed the 1970s film renaissance, and introduced thoughtles drivel as the norm.
At World's End is every bit as terrible as Dead Man's Chest, which I walked out of at the 2 hour mark.
The AMC theater chain owes me two hours of air conditioning after turning it off after the first hour. Find another way to cut costs and max profits, you jerks.