Full of Sound and Fury - Signifying Nothing

Rating: 3/10 (28 May 2007)

I gave this picture three stars as a salute to the fabulous special effects (except for the 50-foot woman, whom I felt was better played by Darryl Hannah) I particularly enjoyed the shivering monkey (note to all the animal rights activists out there - no monkeys were actually frozen in the making of this movie).
I have no clue where the writers of this film thought they were going. The plot lept wildly about, like a well-dressed schizophrenic on amphetamines. The friend with whom I went to this picture kept nudging me and mouthing "What's going on?" as though I had any better an idea than he. He also brought along his young nephew, who spent half the movie covering his ears to protect them from the din, and the other half yawning.
The writers needed to provide the audience with some sort of clue as to where the locations were - like some print saying "The Afterlife", or "Davey Jones' Locker" - I mean, how in the (pardon me) is any reasonable person to know that the Sahara desert is the afterlife, and that if you want to get to the Afterlife yourself, you have to go over a waterfall near the polar cap? Like everybody knows this. Yeah, right.
And this went on for three hours. How unspeakable. How monstrous. Wonderful effects, and Captain Jack was entertaining in his swishy cavalier way. But God...somebody should have put this thing out of its misery. What an absurd expenditure of money.