sadly lacking

Rating: 5/10 (23 May 2007)

In spite of a talented cast, a remarkably appealing concept, and all the money in the world, Pirates 3 falls sadly short of satisfying.
As promised, it was visually appealing, with special effects on a scale to match its epic image. But, like all things of unnecessary grandeur, the effects are compensating for something... the absence of which detracted significantly from the movie experience. A purpose. True, entertainment can be considered a purpose, and it is here for the finding, but entertainment need not be as painfully drawn out as this.
So, if not entertainment, what is the point? Certainly not to tell a unique or provocative story. It's absolutely baffling how a film with a stomach-churning number of plot twists can still be predictable.
The final result is that neither casting, (the inclusion of Keith Richards while unnecessary, was inspired) expensive effects, nor a plot as twisted as the tentacles of the Kraken can rescue these Pirates from utter vacuousness.
Yet it doesn't seem to matter, Pirates 3 is an inevitable blockbuster. This Pirates owes its predestined box office success to 2003's "The Curse of the Black Pearl", an exceptional film, easily eclipsing its counterparts in quality, entertainment, and does so in less time.
Perhaps guaranteed success will assuage the guilt on the part of the filmmakers for inflicting this film upon audiences worldwide. Or perhaps audiences are simply foolish to expect anything of substance from pirates such as these.