Still a huge fan of Pirates, despite this display of weirdness

Rating: 6/10 (3 October 2009)

This movie starts out with a huge line of pirates waiting to be hanged by the British for no other reason than just being pirates. The camera focuses on a little boy pirate with a coin in his hands. As he's brought up to the gallows, he starts singing. Then all the pirates start singing. Then the British are like "What the..." Then the movie switches to Elizabeth in a canoe on a river in who-knows-where singing that same song. Then she and Barbossa, who was brought back to life, start talking to this guy. Finally you find out they're in Singapore, but you don't really know why. Then there's a really fun cool action sequence that makes you forget your confusion.
Much later, the screen goes black and you hear voices, gunshots, and yelling pirates. Then the screen goes white, and you see a nose. The nose is sniffing around for a while and then comes to a peanut. Right about now you actually think you had gone into the wrong movie, until you see that it was Jack Sparrow's nose. Then there's a long scene of multiple Jack Sparrows for some reason, then they all fade, when you realize the real Jack was just hallucinating. Then it shows his ship, which is in the middle of absolutely nowhere, then a bunch of rocks appear that turn into crabs. WHAT????
The part that made me most upset, in this movie was the dying romance between Will and Elizabeth. Why did they fall apart? There was no reason for it.
The most confusing part of the plot was the whole thing about Calypso, the sea goddess, who turned out to be that Jamaican lady who's name I never really got. At this part, all the pirates want to release her from her "human bonds". So they do that, and she grows to gargantuan size. They all bow to her, then she starts yelling. Only, it sounds more like King Kong bellowing in Japanese than a person yelling. Then, she explodes into a million little crabs. WHAT????
Of course, Jack still provided funny moments, and the action was amazing. Don't listen to those losers who say the action scene at the end was too long, because it was really cool and exciting and I was actually sorry it was over.
I hated what happened to Will at the end. NOT COOL, Disney!!!! I won't give away what happened, but just know it's not fair.
I still can't wait for the fourth movie (and yes, they are making a fourth) and I still like this movie, but I HOPE AND PRAY they will not make as many mistakes as they did in this movie. This movie is good, but it's not amazing. I still like it, but I am still confused.
Disney, come on. Get some writers who know how to write and directors who know what a truly incredible movie is.