Leaden, lifeless, emotionally empty direction and a pace that will render mind and bum comprehensively numb

Rating: 2/10 (23 May 2007)

Unfortunately, the third Pirates of the Caribbean film is destined to join the dreaded list of trilogy disasters.
At World's End is a messy maze of complicated plot twists and convoluted characters that coasts along on the success of the first two films.
It spends the first third wrapping up Dead Man's Chest, the second third trying to explain its massively complex plot and the third vainly attempting to make it all sound meaningful.
Hardly the stuff of successful movies - let alone trilogies.
If it feels like a rehash of the first two films, that's because it largely is. There are precious few new characters, and director Gore Verbinski relies on Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) and his camp goofiness so heavily it should be called the Captain Jack Sparrow Show.
As the plot builds towards a final showdown, the love story continues to revolve around William Turner (Orlando Bloom), Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley) and their 'will they-won't they' merry-go-round. Snore.
It's a similar story with At World's End's special effects. They're impressive, but it feels like we've seen them all before.
The best are stolen from the far superior Dead Man's Chest, with only a short sequence featuring Sparrow hallucinating in Davy Jones' locker showing any signs of inspiration.
Thankfully, the much-hyped appearance of Keith Richards as Sparrow's father is well worth the wait. Richards is brilliant, and if there were more of him he could have single-handedly saved the film.
But it's a wasted opportunity, much like the rest of the film.
To get to the climactic overblown whirlpool battle, you'll have to navigate a massively complicated plot that features more twists, turns and double-crosses than a con artist convention.
You'll need more than a compass, an eyeglass and a map marked with 'X' to understand what the heck is going on. By the time you get to the end, you won't remember how you got there or why you're supposed to care.
To make matters worse, the final scenes hint a fourth movie could be on the cards.
Come on, guys. Successful movie quadralogies are even rarer than trilogies. Surely it's time to give Captain Jack Sparrow and his merry band of pirates a rest? Review: Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End By CHRIS SCHULZ - Stuff.co.nz