The Rocking Of Opportunism

Rating: 2/10 (13 April 2009)

Trying to satisfy the most ends up, as is usually the case, not satisfying anyone. The blatant attempt to be cute turns out out to be rather nauseating. Not a single moment of truth, not a single moment of beauty. It is quite simply atrocious. It also felt endless and I'm not giving it a 1 because there are some spot on musical moments within the otherwise opportunistic score. I like(d) Richard Curtis but he is taking his formula of odd ball characters to a place where no human being (the thinking kind) ever ventures. A French farce with typically scatological British touches. And Philip Seymour Hoffman? What's with this guy? Very good actor but his dishevelment is starting to get on my nerves. Even as Truman Capote I felt he needed a shower. Emma Thompson has a grand cameo but, quite frankly, it belonged to a completely different film. None of it ringed true and if I sound angry it may be because I am. I left my house, I drove under the rain, had to park, paid outrageous fees for parking, tickets, a drink and then I had to sit through this mess of a thing. There is a moment on the last third when the characters, hit by a Titanic style emergency, have to transmit their boat's location and you wait with unbearable impatience for the inevitable crowd of boats coming to their rescue. Oh dear, Oh dear. Kenneth Brannagh comes to elevate, slightly, the boring proceedings with a fine tuned cartoonish villain. Lost at sea, that's how I felt and as you may very well imagine, I didn't like it one bit.