What a waste of eight bucks

Rating: 4/10 (27 May 2001)

The movie Pearl Harbor, through the previews i originally saw, looked like your typical Bruckheimer/Bay film. The film had everything it needed to have hype: blockbuster actors, (Cuba Gooding Jr., Affleck, Voight, Alec Baldwin, Dan Akroyd, etc.) amazing sound and special effects, and some cliche taglines. Thus, coming into this movie, I was expecting the worst, yet the hype, which was a blatant corporate onslaught for the last four months, made it seem bearable, at least for the first of the three hours.
As I entered the movie, in my somewhat intoxicated state of mind, the movie started with an overused example of a boy saving his friend from his deadbeat dad after he and his friend got busted for accidently flying his dad's plane on the typical midwest farm. After watching this, I knew it was going to be a long movie. As the movie progressed into the time of World War II, we meet the older Affleck, who we learn is an aspiring pilot, yet is somewhat illiterate, which is rarely touched on in the film. Thus, in an effort to join the navy, he sweettalks the eye exam nurse into letting him pass his exam becuase it was "his dream ever since he was little to fly with the birds". Consequently, Affleck and the nurse hit it off, yet this proceeds for another 90 minutes, until Pearl Harbor is even mentioned. Affleck and his friend compete for Evelyn's love, until the attack on the Harbor, which was a blatant attempt by Hollywood to make the Japanese look like murderers. After the attack, you can probably guess how the movie unfolds, the good guy getting the girl, and so on. All in all, this movie sucked. The appearance by Cuba Gooding Jr. was irrevelant, and Roosevelt is portrayed as a god. There was no mentioning of the legacy of the attack, and the events leading up to the attack were completely misrepresented. I wont digress into a history lesson or anything, but America did know that an attack on either the Phillipines or Guam or Pearl Harbor was imminent. In this film, all the chiefs of staff are clueless, and try to act as befuddled as possible when they lose sight of the Japanese fleet. The story surrounding the movie was as thin as ever, very Bruckheimer-esque. Basically, the story was merely a backdrop for the attack scene, and also so the movie could be shown on two tapes. The bottom line, save your eight bucks, and go rent Tora, Tora, Tora.