Three hours of my life that I will never get back

Rating: 1/10 (5 September 2001)

What can I say about Pearl Harbor that is nice. Well, it did make me laugh all the way through it. I've seen some bad movies in my life, but then I was subjected to the hell that is this movie.
I'm not saying that this movie didn't have anything good about it. It is immensely quotable, with lines such as "No, we have lost surprise," said by Admiral Yamamoto. Or the line said by Jimmy Doolittle "We're going to Tokyo, and we're gonna bomb it!" Other than that, there was nothing redeemable about the experience.
First, being a history buff, the way they portrayed the attack was laughable. The subplots were sub par, and often times, I found myself wondering why this movie was called Pearl Harbor, when only a few minutes actually dealt with the raid. Then again, there were those shots of kids playing baseball, which just warmed my heart. Too bad that they were playing ball at seven in the morning on a Sunday. The eagle squadron in England was not comprised of volunteers in the US Army Air Corp., because anyone who wanted to fly with them had to relinquish his commission. Finally, the whole story about FDR standing up was atrocious. FDR was paralyzed from the waste down due to polio. There is no way, save perhaps a miracle from god, that he could achieve that feat. Then there was the flashback sequence at the beginning, which broke every rule of what not to do in as script. Can anyone say "Titanic"?
In the end, I would recommend that this movie be shown to people by the defunct KGB as a torture device. Only people who like to make fun of movies or masochists should watch this on purpose.
"You ever seen Pearl Harbor at sunset?" "yes." "No, have you ever seen Pearl Harbor at sunset, in an airplane?" "Have you ever seen Pearl Harbor at sunset in an airplane...on weed?"