Insipid

Rating: 1/10 (24 June 2001)

It's really depressing just how bad a movie can be and still be
commercially successful. And this is one really, really bad movie.
Like Mr. Bay's previous insult to the intelligence and taste of the
movie-going public, Armageddon, this film chokes on some of the
most nausea-inducing dialog ever written for a major motion
picture. A few samples:

"You're so beautiful it hurts!"
"I'm gonna give Danny my whole heart, but I don't think I'll ever look
at another sunset without thinking of you!"
"I think World War II just started."
"Sir, it's risky, but it's bold!"
"God help anyone who gets into a war with the Americans!"
"I'm not anxious to die -- just anxious to matter!"
barf, barf, barf, barf, barf, barf.
This, of course, doesn't even begin to touch on the inane story:
suffice it to say that absolutely nothing of any interest to anyone
with an IQ over 70 happens during the 80% of the film that isn't the
attack scene. It also leaves out the egregious historical idiocies,
perpetrated by Disney in order to avoid offending the Japanese.
The violence will appeal to teenage boys, and the love story, such
as it is, to teenage girls. They won't learn much about Pearl
Harbor, and what little they do learn will be mostly wrong, but there
are probably more harmful pastimes. I'd seriously question the
intellectual capacities and aesthetic tastes of anyone over the age
of 17 who enjoys this swill, however.