Deep Independance Titanic Armageddon Harbour hits theaters - Who cares?

Rating: 6/10 (30 May 2001)

Do we really need a three hour exploration of a love triangle with a Pearl Harbour background? Thats what this movie is - do not be decieved by the trailers - this is not "Saving Pearl Harbour". It is the same as every single other big blockbuster. You basically have two seperate movies - one with a hackneyed, cliched, "I've seen this about a million times" love triangle between two young friends and the woman they love, and the other a kick-ass action sequence which accurately portrays the complete and utter surprise the Japanese caught the Americans in. The lines in the first hour and a half are SO CHEESY - but not GOOD cheese. I can't believe Ben Affleck did not crack up saying his lines, they are that bad. "I may be going to die, but thinking of you is what will keep me alive. I can't die - I've only just met you." That is the caliber of dialogue between Affleck and Beckinsdale.
I have to say, once the action heats up, and the planes start coming, the movie moves into what it should have been all along - get rid of the love story between the three main stars - concentrate on the horror and shock the attack inflicted on the American troops. The producers and directors got this right - Pearl Harbour was caught not just with their pants down, but off, hanging on the chair, and neatly folded. Problem is, you've been lulled to sleep by the horrible dialogue, cheesy acting and bad script, that the attack loses some of the punch it otherwise might have had. Thats not to say its not powerful, but the people behind Saving Private Ryan had it right - shock the hell out of the viewers FIRST, then insert great story (Bruckheimer would have to get a good story before he tries it, but its not in this cookie-cutter movie). Also, the bit with Cuba Gooding Jr.? Did that not seem horribly tacked on to you? Did it have ANYTHING to do with the rest of the movie, except to get another big name (not to mention black) star into the movie? I'm sure the story of his character - the first black man to win the Silver Star - is an interesting one, but its just kind of thrown in there, as a side show (I kept seeing "TOKEN BLACK MOMENT" flash across the screen for some reason - this story deserved more emphasis and care then the producers gave it here - I feel sorry for Cuba..)
In short, you've seen the movie before. But at least Titanic had the cool bad guy. Everyone in this movie is so whiny (Titanic also had Kate Winslet naked, but Beckinsdale expects us to believe she would make love with the man of her dreams with her UNDERWEAR ON...not terribly important, but another stupid moment in a stupidly conceived movie..). Its worth going on cheap night to see the action, and the final moments with the squadron of B-17s attacking Tokyo (a little known historical tidbit dealt with quite well, and an aviation feat quite spectacular), but it doesn't overcome the first hour.