Absolutely Speechless

Rating: Null/10 (25 May 2001)

Oh wow folks. I saw "Pearl Harbor" the other day at the grand extravaganza on Ford Island in Hawaii. I'm a journalist, and I don't have any motive to bow to the Hollywood machine, just the truth. However awful it may be. Let me begin by saying that if I did have connections with the fine fine folks of the machine, I would be hanging my head in disgrace over this $150 million dollar waste of valuable resources. I'm not sure what happens to people when they reach the top of the entertainment ladder, but it ain't good. Somehow these kind kind folks received approval for the horribly lame script and gargantuan budget before anyone seriously questioned whether or not the movie would actually be any good. I was in LA a couple weeks ago, and on every other block there's a gigantic billboard advertising Pearl Harbor. It seems that this sprawling city has absolutely no shame in being an advertisement of itself, to itself. This wouldn't be so bad of course, if the movie itself wasn't such an insult to film making and the audiences that shell out the bucks that allow them to perpetuate this sham. **SPOILER ALERT** Pearl Harbor was bombed by the Japanese, folks.