No one can hear you scream ('cause it's so deadly boring)

Rating: 1/10 (26 October 2009)

This is yet another "Blair Witch Project" copycat that is seeking to maximize bucks for minimal expense and effort – except when it come to viral web marketing.
It is "Blair Witch Goes Suburban," where café lattes, wine, a flat screen TV and plush furniture replace roughing it by camping in the Maryland woods.
The film fails miserably at any kind of horror unless you get scared at lots of loud thumps, gratuitous screams, and things being pulled with transparent fishing line.
The only brief attempt at horror-show is some cheesy imagery that is shamelessly stolen straight from "The Exorcist." The ghoul makeup was supplied courtesy of the Wal-Mart Halloween aisle.
It has boring, repetitious and claustrophobic cinematography – if you can barely call it that -- given that most of the videography involves running up and down the stairs ad nauseam.
It's really hard to get spooked about the self-imposed cage the couple puts themselves inside in the middle of San Diego. Don't these saps have friends to stay with? At least take a walk!
The bedroom scenes are monotonous and predictable. The two-person cast is so whiny and bitchy they soon grate on your nerves and you're rooting for the demon to finish the job. The boyfriend's macho response to all the creepy antics is impossibly implausible. A wimpy psychic offers a brief diversion, but soon we're back to prowling the modest sized house that is anything but a haunted mansion.
This Blair Witch genre is so insipid I wish it would just die. But the old adage still holds, "there's a sucker born every minute."