Cthulu v Transformers

Rating: 1/10 (25 May 2014)

It took two sessions for me to watch this drivel. I fell asleep about half way through and had to see part two the following day.
As far as I can make out this is about giant sea monsters vs transformers. Charlie Day and Burn Gorman play the gravediggers from Hamlet, badly. The two stars of Sons of Anarchy prove that they can't act their way out of a paper bag.
Meanwhile Idris Elba puts in an embarrassingly bad performance ( Imagine the key speech from Gladiator written and delivered by Worzel Gummidge.) Action has been replaced by acres of CGI that might satisfy an eight year old but will fail to impress sentient beings evolved beyond the level of igneous rocks.
The only redeeming feature of this film is that it is, at least, better than the pretentious and unoriginal nonsense that was Pan's Labyrinth.