Aesthetically pleasing but lacking brains or a heart

Rating: 4/10 (3 July 2020)

An aging actor and his best friend/stunt man try to come to terms with how Hollywood is changing into something they no longer recognize and are no longer central to.
There is a mix of fact and fiction throughout; some people real, some made up; some events real, some made up. Visually this film is breath-taking at times, some lovely scenery, and some gorgeous retro costume, sets, and vehicles. The actors in the film carried off their roles quite well, albeit without being engaging enough for me to really care about too much. Pitt and DiCaprio's bromance drives the film forward, and Margot Robbie provides a more light-hearted side story.
So why the poor rating for what some people are calling a 10 out of 10 film?
Well, unfortunately I did not really enjoy this long winded "what if" look at Hollywood for a few reasons. Just to be clear, I am not "new audience" and I do enjoy some of Tarantino's other films, this however was a struggle for me.
I felt that the film was trying too hard to be cool and culturally relevant. It came across as aesthetically pleasing, but with truly little substance. A summary which pretty much explains how I felt about the entire film.... it looked good, really really good at times... but it didn't have substance, it lacked a real heart or brain, or in this case, a decent plot. It was just lots of beautiful things thrown together without ever going much further. If it has of been a "paint by numbers" film, then it had all the elements it needed to make an extravaganza.... but the final masterpiece that was put onto canvas almost felt too manufactured and forced. Sure, there was a little character development from DiCaprio; but not enough to care or show growth. Sure, there was action in it from Pitt, but not relevant to the overall vehicle of the movie. Sure, there was sex appeal, but it did not contribute anything, it just was.
"Once upon a Time... in Hollywood" is a really long film with a small climax that is far-fetched in the context of the rest of the film. In fact, the climax of the film it the one true Tarantino signature - you watch that part and you know you are watching one of his movies. The 2 hours prior to that though, it would be hard to see clear signatures of his famed auteurship.
I was left unfulfilled and robbed of the time that I could have been watching other films. I find it hard to recommend this film and staggered and bemused by the amount of people who have awarded this a perfect 10 out of 10. If you have seen this, ask yourself some serious questions:

Would this have as much fanfare and prestige if it were not a Tarantino movie?
Would you have looked at the film twice if it did not have De Caprio and Pitt in it?
Would you have rated it as highly if Margot Robbie's legs were not on display? (Just to clarify, that is not me being sexist for objectifying female anatomy, look at other reviews and count how many times you see the aforementioned legs mentioned as a driver to a decent rating!)

If the answer to the above is probably not - then how can this be the film of 2019? If the answer to the above is yes, then be careful with that growing nose.
Not the best film I have ever seen, not the worst film either. An exceptionally long and at times disengaging film. Lots of beautiful aesthetics, no heart or decent plot. A 'just is', "what if" film that will surely divide opinions that I personally did not enjoy greatly. 4 out of 10.