It's official, old buddy, you're a has-been.

Rating: 4/10 (21 August 2019)

'Once Upon a Time ... in Hollywood' isn't a good film. It's dull, far too long, very baggy, and quite simply a bit boring on the whole. Even in its best scenes, where it's a little more interesting, it's never truly engaging and this is primarily because the whole affair is rather aimless, seeming to not have a real purpose. For a film with a run-time of 161 minutes, it's extremely light in the story department and what is happening is hardly interesting at all. Every beat of the narrative is pretty much in the trailer (minus the stuff in the final third), which is very surprising as it seemed like the marketing department must have been keeping something hidden to deliver a better experience. Surely then, the character work is excellent and Tarantino's signature dialogue keeps things interesting, right? Nope. While DiCaprio and Pitt are at the top of their games, the actual characters are very uninspired and the dialogue is pretty standard. It doesn't help that there is hardly any development in that department, either. Rick Dalton has a very tiny arc, even if it's basic and just told to you in a clunky third-act exposition dump, but the rest of the characters stay the exact same throughout, which obviously makes things far less compelling. Sharon Tate is hardly even in the picture, which is very bizarre considering that Tarantino began the screenplay about her. She's just used as a tool to try and build tension in the audience as they anticipate what is going to happen to her. This links with another major issue with the piece. It's a half-fictional, half-based on reality narrative about a made-up actor and stuntman that's telling the story of Sharon Tate and the Manson murders. It doesn't sound like that's a good mix, and that's because it isn't. It simply doesn't work. Supposedly, this is Tarantino's love letter to Hollywood, but it just seems like he hates it and everybody in it - just look at the Bruce Lee scene. The way that Tarantino portrays, and even treats, him is horrendous, which is very strange considering that Lee was clearly an inspiration on some of his earlier films. When asked about this scene, Tarantino has said that he accurately portrayed Lee because that's what he was like in real life. Tarantino didn't know the guy so there's no sure fire way of him knowing that and he just comes across as arrogant himself when he refuses to accept that he's in the wrong, especially when people who actually knew Lee in person have spoken out about it. The final act of the film has been much discussed and, for the most part, has been heavily praised. I'm not going to spoil anything here, but let's just say that it's dealt with in typical 'Tarantino' fashion. However, where it goes is very predictable - I guessed what would happen correctly after seeing the trailer - and it's actually dealt with in pretty poor taste to the point of being rather disrespectful. I know what Tarantino is trying to do with it, but the message is rather messy and the final result rather uncomfortable. Look, while the whole thing is pretty bad, it's not completely without merit. If anything should be being praised about it, it's definitely the performances. They're fantastic all round, with DiCaprio and Pitt truly giving almost career-best ones, but unfortunately that's not enough to make this thing worth recommending. The other great aspect of the film is the production design; you truly believe the 1960's Hollywood aesthetic. Again, though, that's not enough to overcome the bland screenplay and total lack of narrative investment. People are saying that it's Tarantino's most emotional movie to date, but I felt absolutely nothing for its entire duration. Although, after thinking about just how much of a waste of time the experience was, I find myself rather irritated. I guess that's something. It's certainly a polarising picture, one that Tarantino has said he wants people to discuss. I doubt he meant discussing how disappointing it is though. 4/10