As a bevy of snickering young ladies streamed out of . . .

Rating: 9/10 (31 July 2019)

. . . my showing of ONCE UPON A TIME IN H0LLYWOOD--beaming with ear-to-ear grins--it was difficult to believe that H0LLYWOOD writer\director "Q.T." had ever been accused of "misogyny." While the main female character here is portrayed as a dirty-soled adulteress with a thing for 12-year-old boys, at least she doesn't eat any of the canned dog food. The latter distinction belongs (more or less) to the second-fiddle H0LLYWOOD female, who has her entire face mashed in by a full can of canine chow being fired into it like a fastball. (After just ten minutes of noisy suffering, this wailing banshee is mercifully dispatched with a flame thrower.) Though some might argue that the Alpo-visage chick's fate pales in comparison to that of her female companion (a demise involving being partially EATEN by a bulldog, THEN having her mug shattered and flattened against eight extremely hard and hateful objects), let's not forget about the harpy battle-axe "Janet," who only has the side of her car caved in when "Rick" tosses "Cato" halfway through it.